we need a what NOT to do in a relationship...for us relationship challenged individuals.....just sayin' :blink:

I think it's vital to be selfish sometimes. Selfish in the way I interpret that word at its root. Be focused on your self. Have a rich inner life. Be complete unto yourself so that you can bring a whole, fully formed you to the mix. That whole "you complete me" thing disturbs me. I don't want to complete you, but I'd love to be your balancing counterpart. I'll gladly be the savory to your sweet and want you to be the acid in my base.

I like this! In fact I just had a conversation with a friend about a similar topic. I am a hopeless romantic but stand on my own two feet. I want someone that compliments me and I them. Thanks for sharing.

I'm a big believer in least said soonest mended but sometimes you have to call someone about how they're treating you. Sometimes being too understanding, too patient, trying too hard to be kind for fear of offending someone and hurting their feelings, sometimes all this does is tell them you think they're too weak to hear the truth. That's not respecting or loving someone or yourself.

When I was splitting from my ex husband because I had woken up to my sexuality, there was no direction to run because of our little girl, except to scrape the barrel of the cess pit where our relationship was and tell each other some bare truths. In the end it made us realise how much we really cared about each other, because after everything was said we were still there, neither of us ran away. I have a good friend who I know I can always count on now.

I've found less is more..less expectation/judging means in the long run more contentment..if you need a lot in a relationship, it's realistic to expect you're going to have to deal with a degree of disappointment..less money, the more money we make the busier we tend to be and tempted or have to devote a lot of time outside of your relationship..I think you have to be on relatively the same page when it comes to finances..but if you can both downsize you are paid back with time to spend however you both decide pursuing happiness, less worrying about your happiness, more about your partner..if you have the right one, this is almost brilliantly selfish for no doubt they will catch on and try to outdo you..less problem, more solution..be the person he/hi/she loves to hang around, be fun & every once in a while plan a surprise..or be the surprise..

uhermm
 

When She wants to just take a quick peek in the mak make-up place or that sephorium something place and you know her quick peek means blowing all the money in your wallet and the peek is now an hour and a half later and you feel stupid in those stores Then what to do is smile and nod and say babe you dont need any of these things bc you are naturally beautiful.


FYI : it doesnt stop her from buying stuff but its what you should do .
Ya know smile and and nod and keep the compliments going .

It's the big things that sometimes seem little.
 

Remember that the darkness, right before sleep, is the perfect time to whisper sweet nothings into your lovers ear. Intimacy, it's a gift.

Do not tell your better half everything!
They dont need to know the sort of poo you just had! Or that you just dug out a really huge booger from your nose. And space. You don't need to be stuck to their hip all the bloody time. (If you have been with this person for more then five years, then none of this applies.)

Do everything in your power to see that your words match your actions. Better yet, fewer words, more actions.

if...
 

if they offer to help you mop the floor..marry her/hym/him (Keeper) jk but not rilly:toast:

They'll always be there ...
 

In a relationship,
- Remember that there are three entities involved: me, her, and “us”.
- Balance the attention and care given to each entity.
- Treat entity with kindness and respect.

Because a life time is a long time ...
 

kiss often

Respect and be attentive!

Do
 

Trust her and show her you love her dont just say it.

keep your eyes on him/her

Daktari
 

Interesting..care to explain?

Savor her.

Remember to take time for each of you and to savor the time you get to spend together :)

Celebrate each others foibles. Try to keep sight of the notion that part of your initial attraction was that her quirkiness is unlike anyone else's.

Make the little extra effort every single day:

Here's mine:

*If you have areas where you are irresponsible, change this. I believe your irresponsibility affects your partner, too, even if you don't merge lives.

*Get real with, and deal with, addiction.

*If you have issues from the past, work on resolving these before you get too involved with someone new.

*Essentially, get yourself as emotionally, spiritually, and physically healthy as you can be, then stay that way. Don't look for a partner to "fix" you.

Was I even close?

play and romp like puppies and kittens

growling and romping without biting hard or taking it too seriously

Cherish all of the memories, reminisce about them (with each other) often.

Typical answers, but for the love of cake, communicate and respect one another's space.

Amante, I love that StoryCorps animation! The rest of the series is also wonderful, but Danny and Annie's story was so touching. <3

If you're mad, hold hands.
 

My wife and I used to hold hands when we were mad at each other. There was a time or two that I thought she was only holding my hand to keep herself from slapping me, so maybe it was worth the effort in the end. Holding hands when you argue makes it hard to disconnect from each another and it makes it hard to escalate too. We took space when we needed it but I swear holding hands when you're mad is the secret to successful marriage.