Well of course! It just struck me funny how that conversation might go... :jester:

Her: I'm a stone femme

Me: Oh... uh ... so... is that with the space or without the space?

Her: Sorry? *looking confused*

Me: Well... ya know... is that... capitol S space capitol F? Or... just capital S ... no space.

Her: *looking more confused*

Me: Ya know... penetration good *makes goofy happy happy face* ... or penetration bad?? *makes exaggerated sad face*

*waitress overhears, turns and walks slowly away from our table*

Her: Umm... I'm going to powder my nose ... I'll be right back. *looking a little nervous*

Me: Oh sure... certainly... *oblivious*

*Her leaves table... heads towards restroom and then darts the opposite direction out of the restaurant*


Yes, these are the things that amuse me. :p

I didn't know there was a difference between Stone Femme and Stonefemme.

What I found very interesting is that, in one article, they discussed the difference between a high femme and a Stone Femme / Sonefemme (incorrectly).

They made Stone Femmes / Stonefemmes sound like sirens and high Femmes, the prize.

I realize labels are fluid but I am, in no way, a hard stone that doesn't feel anything and adapts because I learned how. That is how Stone Femmes/ Stonefemmes were described.

I identify as stone because i don't naturally default to an active role, but my only hard limit is around the wearing of toys.

Outside of that, i will do things that are outside of my default role, but there has to be a specific and direct request lol

I have loved the world of BFP because I have learned so much that I never knew.

I have been out since 1978 but much has changed since that time. My world got smaller during my 19-years with the same woman.

I have appreciated the frank discussions on the threads like this and I have appreciated that one could honestly admit a lack of knowledge (respectfully, of course) and that there is always someone that will step in to educate (also respectfully).

Sometimes, I get touchy because it has been difficult for me at times, when, on occasion, I feel as though I need to stand up and represent for those of us that still identify as lesbians.

No one loses their shit however, and I appreciate that too.

To me it has always been a constant as well, but things seem different among the younger generations. I think they feel a need to define things in a way that is more specifically personal for the way they feel about their sexuality and gender identity. My generation was extremely naive in comparison. I don't think it ever occurred to us to explore the diversity of emotional gender, we just accepted (or rejected) the labels already in place without question.
Life used to be a box of chocolates, now it is a bag of skittles.

However, when I stated that things were more fluid I didn't really mean that stone is fluid, I just meant that gender ID and sexuality in general is more fluid than in the old days. Young people are far more informed about sexuality and feel comfortable exploring gender ID and redefining labels or creating new ones. In the old days we were far too busy trying to avoid being arrested for not wearing three articles of clothing associated with our biological gender. lol

I should also state that there is nothing wrong with just identifying as lesbian, nor is there anything wrong with not identifying s butch or femme. No one way of identifying is better or worse than another. I think what you feel you are is what you are and we should embrace and celebrate the diversity in the GLBT community.

*falls over laughing

How about saving that conversation for the second date?

You know, I buck the system anyway. Technically, according to everything I learned about Stonefemme and Stone Femme, I should be Stonefemme but I don't like the way that looks in writing, so I say Stone Femme. Because of grammar.

Whatcha gonna do with THAT?

It's a good thing I'm already taken cuz there might not be hope for me.

I agree with this. Plus it's the 'me, me, me' generation now, so I think that plays into it too.

For the record, I'm totally stealing this -----> "Life used to be a box of chocolates, now it is a bag of skittles."

Priceless!

Yes it's nice that the younger generations have more room to explore gender and sexuality in some ways. I have also seen stone discussed for some as something that is fluid for them, or they are stone-in-the-moment. To me the very essence of stone is its constancy, and I am very happy to be that way rather than fluid - even if that is all the rage, lol. For those who have a different personal definition of stone and what it means to them than I do that's perfectly fine.

I am really happy to be a dominant stone butch Daddy partnered with a submissive stone femme and have our old school dynamic. I was just talking to my girl yesterday about it. Our roles are "set in stone" and we are very happy that way, but that doesn't mean there isn't room for spontaneity or personal and relationship growth.

I dunno!! lol Maybe I'd be the one dartin' outta the restaurant! :p

I think I will continue to avoid using the word stone to describe myself, and correct those that try.

I think for now on I'll just tell girls my switch is broken :tease:

`Pops head around door`....

Excuse me, not wishing to interrupt but I`m sure there would be a thread here about Stone Femme identity but I`m struggling to find it, anyone able to send me off in the right direction please ?

Many thanks

I searched the site just a minute ago, and didn't find a stone femme thread either. I would suggest you start one, but I think perhaps the reason no one has yet, is because they fear thread crashing. (That is what I call posts from people who for some reason feel the need to be publicly criticize others whose
way of identifying, or other subject matter they either don't approve of or don't understand)

Note: I'm not trying to put anyone down or make any accusations, I've just noticed that thread crashing happens a lot on ALL forum sites. Doesn't matter what the purpose of the forum is. I've even seen this activity on parenting/grandparenting forums. If more than two people come together for any kind of discussion there is bound to be a certain amount of judging and conflict.