Butch Femme Planet

Butch Femme Planet (http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/forum/index.php)
-   Singles Mingle (http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/forum/forumdisplay.php?f=125)
-   -   Singles dating: online VS real world? (http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/forum/showthread.php?t=3840)

SugarLips 09-14-2011 06:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DapperButch (Post 417791)
I concur! Not even the relationship or in love thing.... I think it is even weird for people to say they are "dating" before they meet.

What the heck?

I think you can be committed to a person before you actually meet them... That to me would be dating. Maybe not your traditional dinner and a movie kind of dating... But you can still get to know a person (sometimes more so) online just as you can in person. Which is all that dating is anyway.

Not sure if I could go as far as getting married online without meeting the person in real life... but I certainly won't invalidate what someone else perceives as a "marriage" for them.

Nadeest 09-14-2011 07:19 PM

I've gone out both with people that I've met online and through blind dates. I haven't been out with someone that one of my friends have dated, however. I think that both methods have possibilities, but I probably tend to be more wary when meeting people for the first time, when I have met them online.

JAGG 09-14-2011 07:56 PM

Do you (or would you) go out with someone you met online, such as from a dating site, chat room, BFP, etc.? (this can be local or long distance or both) I have so that would be a yes. But I really want something local .
*Do you go out on blind dates? (set up by friends, co-workers) never again.
*Would you go out with someone who has dated someone you know? No. Seems like a bad idea all the way around.

*Which do you think is better: meeting and dating people from an online source, or meeting and dating people you meet in real life? Hands down with out a doubt, meeting someone in real life.

Julie 09-14-2011 07:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JAGG (Post 417876)
Do you (or would you) go out with someone you met online, such as from a dating site, chat room, BFP, etc.? (this can be local or long distance or both) I have so that would be a yes.
*Do you go out on blind dates? (set up by friends, co-workers) Once and never again.
*Would you go out with someone who has dated someone you know? No. Seems like a bad idea all the way around.

*Which do you think is better: meeting and dating people from an online source, or meeting and dating people you meet in real life? Hands down with out a doubt, meeting someone in real life.

So here is a question to all of you who would not date someone who dated someone you know...

Our community is fairly incestuous - be it online or real time. How can this be avoided? Seriously.

JAGG 09-14-2011 08:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Julie (Post 417882)
So here is a question to all of you who would not date someone who dated someone you know...

Our community is fairly incestuous - be it online or real time. How can this be avoided? Seriously.

It does limit your choices. But that's life. At least for me.

Julie 09-14-2011 08:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JAGG (Post 417887)
Well it's partly why I'm still single, not a whole lot of choices.

No, not a whole lot.
You could find a Virgin Bride.

JAGG 09-14-2011 08:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Julie (Post 417889)
No, not a whole lot.
You could find a Virgin Bride.

Virgin???? Heck no. I want someone who has been around the block. I like experience. Virgin has nothing to offer me. BORING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SugarLips 09-14-2011 08:18 PM

lmaoooooo.... omg... you all have me dying in laughter over here!

DapperButch 09-14-2011 08:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JAGG (Post 417887)
It does limit your choices. But that's life. At least for me.

Yep. It's a butch code thing for me, personally. No offense to the choices others make.

Julie 09-14-2011 08:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JAGG (Post 417896)
Virgin???? Heck no. I want someone who has been around the block. I like experience. Virgin has nothing to offer me. BORING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Jagg...
Back to your original statement.
You will be single forever.

Virgin or Has Been Had.
The choice is yours.

(snort)

clay 09-14-2011 08:31 PM

Julie...good question....seriously! For me, I lived in Atlanta,GA for a few years...it was so huge as a community that anyone I did date, hadn't been with anyone in the "community". PLUS I tend to gravitate towards Nurses/Medical People....and that "pool" is not so much a "community". Then I was in a 5 yr and a 15 year relationship...pretty close together. Since being single the last 3 years...I have dated people I met from dating sites...and none were in the community, so to speak. Each person was either an hr. or up to 8 hrs. away...soooo..that kept me from being in the "community" where I lived. I have dated (IRL) 3 people from a site...online...and again, each was from a few states away...and I hadn't thought about your question, until you brought it up. So that is how I manage to stay away from the pool...I tend to steer clear of the "community" just for the "incest part". I was at a potluck a few months ago, in Jacksonville,FL. My first, and only foray into the "pool". The group I was conversing with began to talk about who all each had "slept with" at this particular function...one said "8", one said "5", and one said "almost all the femmes here". It startled me so...and I just thought to myself...I am NOT interested in anyone here. I think it is disrespectful to "kiss and tell" like that....and I didn't want to be a part of it. So, I come online and steer clear of that, if possible. This is just what works for me...and my own opinion...<smiles>
Quote:

Originally Posted by Julie (Post 417882)
So here is a question to all of you who would not date someone who dated someone you know...

Our community is fairly incestuous - be it online or real time. How can this be avoided? Seriously.


DapperButch 09-14-2011 08:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SugarLips (Post 417835)
I think you can be committed to a person before you actually meet them... That to me would be dating. Maybe not your traditional dinner and a movie kind of dating... But you can still get to know a person (sometimes more so) online just as you can in person. Which is all that dating is anyway.

Not sure if I could go as far as getting married online without meeting the person in real life... but I certainly won't invalidate what someone else perceives as a "marriage" for them.

Yes, I agree. I can be "committed" to someone (that is as simple as not seeing anyone else), but I think that I have to meet someone first in order to "date" them. Half of the image one has of a person prior to meeting them (even if they talk 50 times a day on skype), is what they create in their own mind as to who they perceive/want the person to be.

JAGG 09-14-2011 08:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Julie (Post 417916)
Jagg...
Back to your original statement.
You will be single forever.

Virgin or Has Been Had.
The choice is yours.

(snort)

oh no don't be jinxing me Julie.HAHAHA Are you saying I have to lower my standards? Single forever? Well guess I'll just play out the hand I was dealt then. Somehow I doubt I'll be single forever. It will work out for me, it always does.

JAGG 09-14-2011 08:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DapperButch (Post 417925)
Yes, I agree. I can be "committed" to someone (that is as simple as not seeing anyone else), but I think that I have to meet someone first in order to "date" them. Half of the image one has of a person prior to meeting them (even if they talk 50 times a day on skype), is what they create in their own mind as to who they perceive/want the person to be.

I agree, you have to meet someone before you can call it dating. Otherwise, you're just TALKING.

SugarLips 09-14-2011 09:18 PM

semantics... lol :P

atomiczombie 09-14-2011 09:49 PM

I have done the online relationship thing, and it just doesn't work for me. I have been burned too many times from it. I would rather have someone I can actually spend time with in person and have real dates, sex, etc. I think it is just too difficult to really get to know someone only through online and phone conversations. And I just want a flesh and blood hand to hold.

I have never been on a blind date.

I would not date the ex of a friend of mine.

RiverBoi 09-14-2011 09:57 PM

I give up on both lol ;)

Gráinne 09-14-2011 10:12 PM

Do you (or would you) go out with someone you met online, such as from a dating site, chat room, BFP, etc.? (this can be local or long distance or both)

I've done so before, and met a wonderful woman. Unfortunately, she was pretty far away and both of us had rotten timing. We're still great friends. I'd go out with someone I met online, as I don't go to clubs or bars, especially a site where the person's character could be vouced for (like BFP).

*Do you go out on blind dates? (set up by friends, co-workers)

Not again. It's a shock learning what your friends think your "type" is, or what you'll settle for. Now, a party or dinner in which said person was also invited but not as my date-that's OK. It's not just about the fix-up, that way.

*Would you go out with someone who has dated someone you know?

Generally, no. It depends. My best friend's ex, no way (she's straight, anyway, but I mean a very close friend). An aquaintance, again it depends. I'd rather not date if the community was that insular.

*Which do you think is better: meeting and dating people from an online source, or meeting and dating people you meet in real life?

In real life, because you get to see the person "in action", and probably doing something you already like to do.

dixie 09-14-2011 10:30 PM

*Do you (or would you) go out with someone you met online, such as from a dating site, chat room, BFP, etc.? (this can be local or long distance or both)

Yes. I have and I am, and I would again. I have met local and long distance, my current being long distance.


*Do you go out on blind dates? (set up by friends, co-workers)

I've done that a couple times. Once worked out well. Or rather, the dating didn't go so well but I made a very dear lifelong friend out of it.

*Would you go out with someone who has dated someone you know?

Pffft. Have you ever been to Asheville? My entire group of local friends, we have all dated each other, each other's exes, each other's relatives, yada yada yada. It isn't a very large place, and we all just seem to know and understand. Rarely does anyone ever have hard feelings about it. Usually, no matter who is dating or breaking up, we are all still one large group of friends for the long haul. Maybe it's just become tradition, because we all seem to pass one on to the next...lol

*Which do you think is better: meeting and dating people from an online source, or meeting and dating people you meet in real life?

I actually prefer meeting them online and getting to know them that way for a few months before meeting them in person. To me, first dates (and the entire early stage of dating) is awkward and I don't really feel like I can be myself the way I would like. Getting to know someone online allows me the opportunity to open myself up to them without the awkwardness, the physical aspect (lust/shyness/whatnot), or any of the other clouding my mind. Then, by the time I do meet them in person I am much more comfortable and things seem to flow much more smoothly. This could also be because I am a painfully shy person when it comes to the whole dating thing. *shrug*

MysticOceansFL 09-14-2011 11:12 PM

Sure I would date someone from online but only if I chatted with them over five years.
I don't do blind dates nor do I date anyone who has dated someone I know or known for years.
online source and real time are both considered good and you have to becareful in both.







Quote:

Originally Posted by Library_girl (Post 417390)
Hello singles,
I'm starting this thread just to see what everyone thinks about online dating vs. real-world dating. Any and all comments are welcome!



*Do you (or would you) go out with someone you met online, such as from a dating site, chat room, BFP, etc.? (this can be local or long distance or both)
*Do you go out on blind dates? (set up by friends, co-workers)
*Would you go out with someone who has dated someone you know?
*Which do you think is better: meeting and dating people from an online source, or meeting and dating people you meet in real life?


Any other comments on this subject would be great.....these are just questions off the top of my head. :deepthoughts:

THANKS!



All times are GMT -6. The time now is 07:50 PM.

ButchFemmePlanet.com
All information copyright of BFP 2018