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-   -   What Do You Think of TIME‘s Breastfeeding Cover? (http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/forum/showthread.php?t=5030)

SweetJane 05-10-2012 09:19 PM

I was a La Leche League leader. I breastfed both of my children. Both until they were about 2 1/2. By that time it wasn't for food or antibodies as much as it was at bedtime to calm them from a busy day or when they were ill. I also practiced attachment parenting, but we never called it that---it was simply good mothering, being attentive to your child, realizing their was a reason why they cried, and putting their needs first as you slowly helped them to become very independent human beings---and both of mine were.

I did support other mothers who nursed their children far longer than that. It was their particular choice and usually varied from child to child.

I nursed my children in public, usually under a pretty shawl.

But I never could understand why some people thought even knowing what your child was doing under that shawl was somehow offensive. Especially, since some of these same people wore clothing that showed more than I ever did.

I never wanted to feed my babies in a public restroom. How would you like to have spaghetti in a bathroom?

I do think the Time cover was provocative and meant to create controversy. That's a sad shame really because it puts a lot of mothers in a bad light because they choose to nurse a child beyond a year and it casts a cloud over the content of the article about attentive mothering.

SugarFemme 05-10-2012 09:43 PM

I agree 100% with everything you said:)




Quote:

Originally Posted by SweetJane (Post 582556)
I was a La Leche League leader. I breastfed both of my children. Both until they were about 2 1/2. By that time it wasn't for food or antibodies as much as it was at bedtime to calm them from a busy day or when they were ill. I also practiced attachment parenting, but we never called it that---it was simply good mothering, being attentive to your child, realizing their was a reason why they cried, and putting their needs first as you slowly helped them to become very independent human beings---and both of mine were.

I did support other mothers who nursed their children far longer than that. It was their particular choice and usually varied from child to child.

I nursed my children in public, usually under a pretty shawl.

But I never could understand why some people thought even knowing what your child was doing under that shawl was somehow offensive. Especially, since some of these same people wore clothing that showed more than I ever did.

I never wanted to feed my babies in a public restroom. How would you like to have spaghetti in a bathroom?

I do think the Time cover was provocative and meant to create controversy. That's a sad shame really because it puts a lot of mothers in a bad light because they choose to nurse a child beyond a year and it casts a cloud over the content of the article about attentive mothering.


Scuba 05-11-2012 12:05 AM

Color my clueless I guess but mothers have been nursing their children since the beginning of time. It's how baby's get fed. Whoa and get this the wee one gets all of the appropriate nutrients and antibodies necessary for sustaining it's life. And God forbid we should demonstrate effective methods for parental bonding in public. Do we gasp and close our eyes in horror and shame when we see a kitten nursing? Someone want to tell mamma Polar Bear she really should find a more appropriate place to nurse her young? Sound ridiculous? It should...

Funny how SOCIETY sexualizes/objectifies and shames women all in the same sentence.

I am SO over the patriarch and it's ignorant agenda that I just cringe anymore when articles like this are published. It's high time some people just get over themselves and grow up.

**steps off soapbox**

Thank you for the 5 minutes...

Scoobs :)

SugarFemme 05-11-2012 01:18 AM

Kudos to you for this post. I agree with you that the sexualization of feeding your child is inappropriate. And that Time Magazine would stoop so low is sensationalist reporting nonsense. What they call "Extreme Parenting", is being done in MANY cultures all over the world currently. And because it is not a part of Western Culture it is wrong according to the naysayers. What an arrogant, closed minded, and provincial attitude towards parenting and women. Not only is it sexist, but it is classist as well.





Quote:

Originally Posted by Scuba (Post 582647)
Color my clueless I guess but mothers have been nursing their children since the beginning of time. It's how baby's get fed. Whoa and get this the wee one gets all of the appropriate nutrients and antibodies necessary for sustaining it's life. And God forbid we should demonstrate effective methods for parental bonding in public. Do we gasp and close our eyes in horror and shame when we see a kitten nursing? Someone want to tell mamma Polar Bear she really should find a more appropriate place to nurse her young? Sound ridiculous? It should...

Funny how SOCIETY sexualizes/objectifies and shames women all in the same sentence.

I am SO over the patriarch and it's ignorant agenda that I just cringe anymore when articles like this are published. It's high time some people just get over themselves and grow up.

**steps off soapbox**

Thank you for the 5 minutes...

Scoobs :)


Breathless 05-11-2012 02:29 AM

I breast fed both my children, because I was lucky enough to physically be able to. I covered up, a little, as I was uncomfortable being stared at, but I was not about to allow my child to sweat like crazy while trying to nurse. I absolutely support and encourage breast feeding for the nutritional value, and bonding opportunity that it provides. I totally disagree when it is done for shock value and attention.

Beloved 05-11-2012 04:54 AM

http://www.flickr.com/photos/21013206@N04/7175802318/

girl_dee 05-11-2012 05:22 AM

one thing about the photo, it got our attention

always2late 05-11-2012 06:16 AM

ex·ploi·ta·tion (ksploi-tshn) n.
1. The act of employing to the greatest possible advantage
2. Utilization of another person or group for selfish purposes
3. An advertising or a publicity program.

Does the mother in the cover photo actually nurse her child in the manner depicted in the photo? Or was it staged to provoke a reaction? I have no idea. However, if it WAS staged, then it is an example of exploitation. Do I have a problem with a woman nursing in any way or manner she sees fit? No. Do I have a problem with a woman nursing her child beyond the "accepted" age as prescribed by society? No. Would I have a problem with a magazine depicting a cover photo of a woman publically nursing her child in whatever manner SHE chooses? No. Do I have a problem with a magazine staging a photograph of a woman nursing in order to provoke a reaction or sell their issue? Yes.

Kobi 05-11-2012 06:57 AM


The cover got our attention.

The story, however, is about Motherhood not breastfeeding. I want to read it cuz it is supposedly about mothers who go to the "extreme". I want to know what is is considered "extreme" and who is doing the determination.

In the current War on Women, this kind of stuff makes me real edgy.


girl_dee 05-11-2012 07:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by always2late (Post 582719)
ex·ploi·ta·tion (ksploi-tshn) n.
1. The act of employing to the greatest possible advantage
2. Utilization of another person or group for selfish purposes
3. An advertising or a publicity program.

Does the mother in the cover photo actually nurse her child in the manner depicted in the photo? Or was it staged to provoke a reaction? I have no idea. However, if it WAS staged, then it is an example of exploitation. Do I have a problem with a woman nursing in any way or manner she sees fit? No. Do I have a problem with a woman nursing her child beyond the "accepted" age as prescribed by society? No. Would I have a problem with a magazine depicting a cover photo of a woman publically nursing her child in whatever manner SHE chooses? No. Do I have a problem with a magazine staging a photograph of a woman nursing in order to provoke a reaction or sell their issue? Yes.

Regarding your last statement (((( FC ))))) i would venture to say the magazine would deny using it to sell issues but rather to bring attention to the subject at hand, motherhood. We all know anything regarding a breast will sell anything.


THIS is what kills me;

(Rant)

Way back when women stayed home, cooked cleaned and had the house to manage ( i am not talking about abusive, repressed women, but about women who felt happy and content doing so, not those who wanted to work outside the home and were not allowed to) hubby/kids/dog to feed, get kids to appointments/lessons, after school snacks, PTA, volunteer at school, homework etc.. all this was fulfilling to her, this was her part, this was her pride, this was what she did. THEN they said no, to be a *real woman* you have to go get a job, only they didn't tell her she STILL had to do the house, manage the kids, feed the masses, be a soccer mom/ideal wife ALL after working 8 hours a day. So the kids went off to day care, mamere's, crazy aunt loo-loos while mom went off to work. Baby is 6 weeks old? That's old enough for day care! The kid is 12, and a latch key kid now, all so mom can be a (what society deemed) *real woman*. Now this can work out of course, but the notion that we have to do it ALL to be a *real woman* KILLS me. SOOOOOOO then they say nope too many kids in day care, too many kids home alone after school, too many husbands complaining that they have to share housework now, too many kids home playing on the internet while mom is at work, kids eating breakfast and lunch at school, fast food for dinner, SO now, mom you need to stay home and nurture and coddle your babies, how can you even THINK of bringing a 6 week old to a day care center? So if you don't go to work and stay home with your babies you are a now *real woman*.

HOW about society keep their mouths shut and let women/parents decide WHO WHEN HOW WHAT WHERE they want to bring up their younguns... and stop putting demands on us in order that we may be *real women*?

(/rant)

Kobi 05-11-2012 08:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cajun_dee (Post 582759)
Regarding your last statement (((( FC ))))) i would venture to say the magazine would deny using it to sell issues but rather to bring attention to the subject at hand, motherhood. We all know anything regarding a breast will sell anything.


THIS is what kills me;

(Rant)

Way back when women stayed home, cooked cleaned and had the house to manage ( i am not talking about abusive, repressed women, but about women who felt happy and content doing so, not those who wanted to work outside the home and were not allowed to) hubby/kids/dog to feed, get kids to appointments/lessons, after school snacks, PTA, volunteer at school, homework etc.. all this was fulfilling to her, this was her part, this was her pride, this was what she did. THEN they said no, to be a *real woman* you have to go get a job, only they didn't tell her she STILL had to do the house, manage the kids, feed the masses, be a soccer mom/ideal wife ALL after working 8 hours a day. So the kids went off to day care, mamere's, crazy aunt loo-loos while mom went off to work. Baby is 6 weeks old? That's old enough for day care! The kid is 12, and a latch key kid now, all so mom can be a (what society deemed) *real woman*. Now this can work out of course, but the notion that we have to do it ALL to be a *real woman* KILLS me. SOOOOOOO then they say nope too many kids in day care, too many kids home alone after school, too many husbands complaining that they have to share housework now, too many kids home playing on the internet while mom is at work, kids eating breakfast and lunch at school, fast food for dinner, SO now, mom you need to stay home and nurture and coddle your babies, how can you even THINK of bringing a 6 week old to a day care center? So if you don't go to work and stay home with your babies you are a now *real woman*.

HOW about society keep their mouths shut and let women/parents decide WHO WHEN HOW WHAT WHERE they want to bring up their younguns... and stop putting demands on us in order that we may be *real women*?

(/rant)


Um, at the risk of elevating your blood pressure even further.....dont forget mothers are now being blamed for the obesity rates. ;)

Apocalipstic 05-11-2012 08:02 AM

I bet a lot of people are buying Time Magazine and talking about Time Magazine about the controversioal cover. There is no bad publicity.

About mothering and breast feeding? Its nobody's damn business. People need to stop being offended over every damn thing.

girl_dee 05-11-2012 08:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kobi (Post 582779)

Um, at the risk of elevating your blood pressure even further.....dont forget mothers are now being blamed for the obesity rates. ;)

yaknow what they say...

If it's not one thing it's your mother

dark_crystal 05-11-2012 08:40 AM

I think breastfeeding is appropirate anytime and anywhere and i think employers should do everything possible to accommodate breastfeeding mothers

However, i am a little disturbed over the debate because there is starting to be some shaming behavior directed at mothers who are not able to breastfeed.

A climate is emerging where formula in a bottle seems to be looked at as the equivalent of antifreeze

There are very valid reasons why some mothers feed formula

girl_dee 05-11-2012 09:16 AM

i once saw a show where a woman was still breastfeeding her 5 year old. The child was assessed as having delayed behaviors because she had no independence developed.

dark_crystal 05-11-2012 09:29 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by June (Post 582823)
Breastfeeding is natural. All mammals breast feed their young...until they're old enough for solid foods.

When I had my son, one of the things they told me was that not only was it good for the baby, especially early on, but that it also was helpful because it made your uterus contract in order to expel all the afterbirth.

I don't agree that it's emotionally healthy to continue feeding your child after they reach an age where they have teeth and can eat solid foods. I don't believe we were built for that. When people used to have more children, they did not keep breast feeding all of them, they were weaned when the next one came along. This feels privileged, and something that has been created for parents with too much time (and money) to navel gaze.

YES. Privileged. That is what I was trying to say! Thank you!

Rockinonahigh 05-11-2012 10:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cajun_dee (Post 582759)
Regarding your last statement (((( FC ))))) i would venture to say the magazine would deny using it to sell issues but rather to bring attention to the subject at hand, motherhood. We all know anything regarding a breast will sell anything.


THIS is what kills me;

(Rant)

Way back when women stayed home, cooked cleaned and had the house to manage ( i am not talking about abusive, repressed women, but about women who felt happy and content doing so, not those who wanted to work outside the home and were not allowed to) hubby/kids/dog to feed, get kids to appointments/lessons, after school snacks, PTA, volunteer at school, homework etc.. all this was fulfilling to her, this was her part, this was her pride, this was what she did. THEN they said no, to be a *real woman* you have to go get a job, only they didn't tell her she STILL had to do the house, manage the kids, feed the masses, be a soccer mom/ideal wife ALL after working 8 hours a day. So the kids went off to day care, mamere's, crazy aunt loo-loos while mom went off to work. Baby is 6 weeks old? That's old enough for day care! The kid is 12, and a latch key kid now, all so mom can be a (what society deemed) *real woman*. Now this can work out of course, but the notion that we have to do it ALL to be a *real woman* KILLS me. SOOOOOOO then they say nope too many kids in day care, too many kids home alone after school, too many husbands complaining that they have to share housework now, too many kids home playing on the internet while mom is at work, kids eating breakfast and lunch at school, fast food for dinner, SO now, mom you need to stay home and nurture and coddle your babies, how can you even THINK of bringing a 6 week old to a day care center? So if you don't go to work and stay home with your babies you are a now *real woman*.

HOW about society keep their mouths shut and let women/parents decide WHO WHEN HOW WHAT WHERE they want to bring up their younguns... and stop putting demands on us in order that we may be *real women*?

(/rant)

I couldnt agree more about all you have said.

Sachita 05-11-2012 10:50 AM

As Dee pointed out the pic gets your attention. beyond the content of the article I'm sure it was meant to strike a chord and sell issues. Kudos to Time for taking risk even if it is the most natural thing in the world.

I breast fed my son the first 6 months. I may have gone to a year or teeth but it just wasn't an option. I had to resume work after 8 weeks and back then the pumps were not nearly as fancy as they are today. I use some daycare but could depend on my family too. I hated using daycare and I think its sucks that a woman can't have that choice if she wants it. I think its France where the government supplements a mother for up to a year for maternity leave. But our system is so screwed up, we are raped in health care and a tax system that supports corruption rather then support american families.

Abigail Crabby 05-11-2012 11:11 AM

I see nothing wrong with breastfeeding in public, attachment parenting and more.

We are more than sexual beings, we are Mothers who (ok some don't always) love their children and do what is best for them.

Screw Time for trying to exploit something natural and beautiful if that's what they are doing I've not read the story and guess I will have to go buy the issue to find out...


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