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This just pointed out by someone else........I am bossy ( My explanation...if I ask something of you that I do not mind doing (dont leave your shoes in the middle of the floor) and I even put a please on the end of it just pick your shoes up
I prefer to call this TIDY |
I've been told that my need to "fix" things for others is an overwhelming aspect of my personality. I own this one for sure. I am working on toning that down .
I come across as demanding at times when I am not actually, it just comes out the wrong way i say things. I see myself as a selfless person, always ready to help anyone in need if I can truly help them. I've been called a doormat for my past relationships I've been in and I OWN this one too. I've let people in my past walk all over me. I'm learning to change this about me. I am constantly looking at who I am and trying to figure out if there is anything else I notice about myself, that may need to change. I am not able to focus enough to even read a sentence and have it make sense in my own mind so I can keep reading. It sucks too. I'm constantly trying to work on this issue. I'm sure there is more, but my brain is on overload from the yelling at me my sister did tonight. If I remember anymore then I will come back and post herere. |
This is a great thread idea :)
Ok here goes *deep breath* 1) I tend to shut down when I am hurt. It is me defense mechanism. It is as if though I go into somewhat of a survival mode. Before that moment, I am 100% open, the second I get hurt, it is like a light switch. It is incredibly difficult for me to get back to normal. 2) I work too much! I mean really! I take on too and neglect myself. I have to work hard at making time for me. My past relationships have suffered some because of this. Learning how to actually leave work at a decent hour, and accept that the work will be there in the morning. 3) Forgiving is easy....forgetting has always been quite hard for me. 4) I am my toughest critic. I beat myself up for so much. 5) somedays I feel fierce and beautiful...most days, I don't even like to look at pictures of myself. I struggle with my self esteem. 6) I can be a cynic. This is just to start....I will be back! |
Thought of another....
It is hard for me to accept any type of help even if it is minor! I remember a friend of mine offered me hys hand when we were walking down a rocky path. I refused it. I don't know why I do things like that! Even something that little!!! |
I can be really competitive, especially when somebody is bragging.
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I've been told that I am too emotional to be butch. That I over emote. wtf is that shit? anywho.......
I've been told that how I show my emotions, usually crying, is over reacting. Do I see these as faults, no but in a past relationship she did and I think it's because she's never dealt with anyone that showed such raw emotion, she usually shut down. I see them as being human and being able to express pain or deeply felt love, something soo deep it's like it runs through my veins because it's soo very very deep in my heart. |
I believe in people, even when its proven they cannot be trusted I still try to believe there is good in there somewhere. This can be to my detriment often.
I like things done my way, don't ask, don't suggest, just DO.(grin) I often choose to stay at home in my comfort zone instead of hanging out at/with friends. |
I have been told I dont clean the house as well as they expected. My fault is that I dont give a rats ass about this. I use to clean my houses until they were spotless. That was when I was more able bodied and not hurting all the time everywhere. My attitude is a fault as well as not keeping up the house like I use to. I am too damn old and too damn much in pain anymore to care if there are dishes in my sink overnite.
I shame easily. Boy does it piss me off now when I realize I am accepting someone else's shame. I have a wicked tongue. I do not hold back. I am 85% of the time easy to get along with, and kind and sweet. But god help you if you snark at me. The more you deserve it, the more you get it. I procrastinate. I am disorganized. I dont eat well. I have started some bad eating habits..I eat boxed things, like rice a roni. (high salt and chemicals), lots of sugar, aspartame, caffeine and high cholesterol foods. My Dr just scolded me for this. |
I have a huge need for structure and the leads to frustration if I feel disorganized
I expect a lot of myself I can be selfish (but catch it quickly) I can be really direct I can easily get caught up is things that pleasantly distract me and then find myself retracting when I come down from the rush having over spent my time and resources. I shut down when I am trying to support someone I care for. I have yet to master my own compromises (I still find myself at times trying to adjust my life to get what I think I need from someone) example: wanting to get in better shape because maybe then she will respond to me the way I hope. |
I can be very literal and miss spontaneity.
I don't play "the game" even when I know it needs to be played just to prove a point. Which is taken as difficult. I can avoid what I don't want to do or am nervous about doing by doing everything else. Even when what I am avoiding is the priority item. I'm working on this one. I am sparse with my encouraging feedback to adults I am work with or that I am in relationships with. Again working on it and making headway! The expectations I have for myself are high, very high. And I have them of others too. Oh especially of folks in positions of power/authority/leadership. I am slow to adjust to changes in plans and directions. I have a sharp tongue and quick wit that is imbedded in my typical speech and missed by many or taken as serious (when clearly I am being facetious or sarcastic). I am disorganized or overly focused on organizing. I don't seem to balance the parts of this well. If I am overwhelmed nothing is getting done until a bolt of clarity occurs. Might as well wait for it cause you can't rush it. |
I am an isolater.
I have difficulty making friends. I tend to expect people to have the same standard as I do and am often disappointed (Mostly in a work setting). Sometimes I think I am tragically unique. What do you mean the world doesn't revolve around Me??? Sarcasm is my second language. |
I have none. Absolutely not one.
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When I haven't been able to get out in awhile, I REALLY embrace the freedom LOL
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I drop the F-bomb in inappropriate places (like work), frequently.
I interrupt people too much (while on the phones at work, this is necessary, a lot. Not so, with loved ones and friends).My mind is going 100 miles a minute, every moment that I'm awake (and probably while I'm sleeping too). I tend to anticipate (mostly correctly, but not always) what someone is trying to tell me, and I make them feel less valued by finishing their thoughts, with my words. I have a constant need for instant gratification. I want answers, and I want them now. I speak my mind, often, and sometimes without realizing my bluntness may anger or hurt people. Not intentionally, I just speak before thinking sometimes, and assume that what I am saying is as clear to the person I am speaking to, as it is to me. This leads to a lot of explaining. I hyper focus on things. Sometimes, this keeps me from moving on to other tasks/responsibilities/activities that need my attention too. Sometimes, I talk myself out of accomplishable goals. I am the queen of procrastination, I seem to like speeding around and doing things at the last possible second. When I take on tasks at a reasonable pace, I tend to get distracted easily by other things. I can be overly kind to others who have been extremely hurtful to me, out of a sometimes misplaced wealth of empathy for what they may have experienced in life. When someone that I care about, or have respect for, thinks I have done something, that I know I have not done, and it is a mean or hurtful thing that they have assumed I am guilty of, I try to explain, but end up in a torrent of tears/sobs, because I can't believe someone that I care about, or who truly knows me, would think I was capable of such a thought or action. This is followed by me clamming up, and shutting down. I have a tendency to then try to blame myself for their assumption, which takes up a lot of emotional energy. Eventually, this leads to an "ah ha" moment, when I realize I am doing that co-dependent thing my mother does, and I am feeling guilty for their thoughts and ideas about me, that have nothing to do with who I am, or any action of mine. This moment sometimes takes way too long for me to get to. I write/type run on sentences constantly, and I am stubborn enough not to care (See above), because it is also the way I express myself in person, and no one ever complains about my punctuation then. :) I am stubborn, resistant to change, and my mother has often told me I would be willing to debate with a stop sign, if I felt that I have a valid argument. Sometimes she appreciates this about me, and says she admires my backbone, sometimes not so much. |
its so nice and gloomy
walling up, and pushing people away before they have a chance to hurt me
overly considerate to the point that it debilitates me (i.e. i need help moving, but dont want to inconvience anyone cause i know they have their own lives and have their own things to worry about and i dont want to ask for help and add more on their plate, so i wont ask and then they get mad cause i dont ask for help and i feel bad for not asking cause then i feel like i made them feel bad.. vicious damned cycle) still learning emotions, and often been seen as aloof. and many many more.... |
I often hold grudges long & hard.
I find I have the propensity to take a strong dislike to certain people, even where they have not shown me any ill will or harm. My instinct is often not to respect other cultures or backgrounds and I have a difficulty embracing many forms of cultural assimilation. |
As strong and independent as I am, sometimes I can be needy especially when I am feeling a little lost. That doesn't last long before I am back to being in the saddle and on my merry fairy way.
I can also play the other role, being the one to be there for somebody else even when I have my own things to concentrate on. |
Quote:
Please don't think I'm being confrontational in anyway as I am not meaning to and, furthermore, my query is not only for you but some others who have posted on this thread. However, I am wondering if some of these are necessarily faults? Rather, some appear to me more as characteristics - for example, I would guess most people want a coffee and kiss in the morning (of course, whether they get either is another matter) and I am not sure how it is a fault, per se, unless there's an additional context or layer? In her post, Cailin used the word "debilitating" in relation to one of her faults and I've been thinking of faults within that context as, if it's not debilitating in some way, I'm not sure it's a fault? |
<---- messy!! I can't help it! Clothes belong on the floor... Lol :)
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When I am in procrastination mode I can become easily addicted to activities. For instance the forums or watching youtube cat videos. I am hoping this fault regulates as I work towards other goals.
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