The "scene" that my wife and I were into 12-14 years ago is MUCH different than our lives now. We both loved the lesbian bars, and the Long Beach area had several...Que Sera, Executive suites (not exclusively lesbian all nights), etc etc...but as we settled down to raise my daughter and live our boring average life, we stopped hitting the bars unless it was for a special occasion like a birthday.

Gay men ( of which I have a large group of friends) love to go out drinking, dancing, have stranger sex and party every weekend and several week nights. They keep the gay bars open and thriving, when I've had a drink and gone home for the month.

We turned to women's RV camping groups and lesbian golf clubs when we need "family time", but mostly it is Church and family and regular every day life for us.

And run as fast as my feet would let me....:|

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I will never see myself as invisable ~ if I do I'll put on red ~ "hello "red is my color :)

location, location , location ~ Living in Masschusetts ,( gaychusetts ) has always made being a gay woman easy, and the community visiable.

Kate McKinnon talking about being a lesbian-I did not know she was!
 

Her skits on SNL are the funniest I have seen in years. She is uber talented!

OMG I had NO IDEA she was:awww:

Living in New Orleans it was the same. Out and proud. Now I am in a rural part of the country and have to watch myself.

Do not like but I am NOT going to hide either!

:bouquet:

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Good 4 you , btw, hi gorgeous !!!!

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To Ms Tinkerbelly,
I am fortunate to have been in my area when a group of savvy women banded together to bring lesbian entertainment to our town. We were able to see Suzanne Westenhoeffer, The Topp Twins, Vickie Shaw, Zrazy (I think...don't quote me) and many more that I can't name right now. The women in my area were most fortunate, for over 20 years, I believe, we were able to be entertained by top lesbian talent...Holly Near is another one. They have, unfortunately retired now. But that was one way of being visible in the community. I don't know whether it was the economy or what, but attendance did seem to taper off towards the end. But if you know of any women in your area with an enterpreneurial bent, this might be something to look into.

Surprisingly, given that the city I live in is Britain's second largest, IMO the lesbian scene here sucks, at least in terms of provision. There is one - count them - one - small lesbian-centric bar, and a couple of other places where lesbians are often to be found at times. But even in the lesbian-centric bar it seems entirely random as to whether you'll find wall-to-wall women (yaay!) or mostly gay guys and their often straight female friends.

I was lucky enough that my first two visits to the scene, lesbian women were out in strength, and I had great nights out. The last couple of times, though,were deeply frustrating. Here I am, libido ticking over nicely, and I'm in the lesbian-centric bar. Damn. Gay guys and their female straight-looking friends.. Check the pool room - two lasses that cant understand my English well. Check the yard - plenty of women there, but clearly already in their own social groups. Suddenly an influx of women into the bar - yaay! DAMN! It's a hen party - complete with inflatable male doll. Sigh... The other two venues - one was mostly full of gay guys and drag queens, the other had me scratching my head to label the clientele, but dykey it certainly was not.

Now, I don;t mind a smattering of hetty women mixing with us, I really don't, so long as they behave sensibly and politely (If you're female and enter a lesbian bar,you may get hit on by women. Decline politely!), but I'd really rather not have guys about at all. Is it too much to ask to have ONE evening per week at one venue that's women-only?

Grrrr.

As for personal visibility,I've never in adult life been too bothered about what others think of my sexuality, I had bigger problems to worry about.

There is nothing where I live specifically geared towards lesbians. I have a couple of gay bars, but nothing specific for lesbians. I wish there was like a butch group where I can met other butches and older butches. I just want a space where I could talk with other butches face to face about our experiences and bond and learn from the older butches who came before me. I feel like there is no space for me where I live even in the LGBT community it really feels like lesbian is considered a bad thing and that needs to stop.

I just need a space and there is none.

I am very happy to hear you'd enjoying talking and learning from older butches! I fear some day that all the history of the LGBT will come by the wayside.....

Create your own. Try Meet Up. You may find you're not alone. You can meet wherever your want; it doesn't have to be anyone's home at first.