Butch Femme Planet

Butch Femme Planet (http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/forum/index.php)
-   Singles Mingle (http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/forum/forumdisplay.php?f=125)
-   -   Single FTM's & Femme's (http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1044)

atomiczombie 12-05-2011 11:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ScandalAndy (Post 480477)
I don't know where else to put this, but I have to get it out, so I hope you all don't mind me putting it here.



One of my close friends is in the beginning stages of transition. We went to Friendly's because he had just finished a long recording session, and I'm never one to turn down ice cream. As is my custom, I survey the table we are going to be seated at, and position myself to best avoid conflict. I noticed that the table to the left had two high school aged girls facing our table, and the table to the right was unoccupied, so of course I sat on the right so I could keep an eye on the high schooler situation. Five minutes after we sat down they both got up to "go to the bathroom" and peeked over at our table repeatedly as they passed. Fifteen minutes later one of them went to the bathroom again. As they were about to leave, both of them went to the bathroom AGAIN, and on their way back, as they're standing next to our table one looks at the other and says "oh my god you're right, it IS a girl".

They went up to the front counter and stood next to their mother and I turned ten shades of red. My friend looked at me with big eyes and said quietly "did that really just happen?" I had a five second debate with myself, tossed my phone on the table, and got up. I walked up to those two girls and I said to them "It is completely inappropriate to repeatedly walk by someone's table and look at their chest to try and determine their gender. Furthermore, you should use "he or she" if you think someone is a boy or a girl. The use of the word "it" is completely dehumanizing and utterly unacceptable." Then I turned around and went back to my table to try and comfort my friend, who was shattered by the whole experience.

I put my happy face on and joked, cheered up my friend, and kept an eagle eye on those two girls who were with their mother in the front entryway, gesturing wildly. Luckily, they left.

Our waitress came over to our table and asked if we needed anything else. I apologized for causing a scene, and she said "Honestly, I heard them talking but I had no idea they were harassing you. If I had known something was going to happen, I would have had it taken care of. I'm so sorry, they need to grow up".

I was so angry I was shaking, but I never once raised my voice with those girls, and our waitress was on our side. Now if only we could get to the point where people don't have to act like this and hurt others.

Thanks for listening, all. Let me know if this should be moved to a diff thread.

Good for you for standing up for him! That's awesome. You are truly a good friend. :)

Heavenleahangel 12-05-2011 03:56 PM

Just popping in to say "Hi" to everyone! Been gone a while....

atomiczombie 12-21-2011 04:36 AM

*ahem*

<----single. :D

GPS 12-21-2011 04:52 AM

Its nice to see more ppl interacting with FtM's
have a great day

Leigh 12-21-2011 08:03 PM

Just saying hi to everyone :)

ScandalAndy 12-22-2011 07:25 AM

Good morning guys and girls!

I've been struggling a lot with being lonely. Since we're all single, and at least some of us are open to finding a relationship, I figure I'm probably not the only one.

How do you deal with it?

I love to give gifts, come up with little surprises just to see the smile on the recipient's face. There are so many things I want to do, but they're too romantic to do for friends.

How the heck do I help myself get over it and move on? You can't force a relationship, and you can't make someone like you if they don't think of you that way. Now I need to figure out what I CAN do to keep myself out of gloomy town.

Any suggestions?

GPS 12-22-2011 07:35 AM

Just wanted to wish you all a Happy Holiday Season!

veryfemme 12-24-2011 09:29 AM

I am a very femme single who loves sweet FTMs :) I hope everyone has a great holiday season!

Liam 12-24-2011 09:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ScandalAndy (Post 490464)
Good morning guys and girls!

I've been struggling a lot with being lonely. Since we're all single, and at least some of us are open to finding a relationship, I figure I'm probably not the only one.

How do you deal with it?

I love to give gifts, come up with little surprises just to see the smile on the recipient's face. There are so many things I want to do, but they're too romantic to do for friends.

How the heck do I help myself get over it and move on? You can't force a relationship, and you can't make someone like you if they don't think of you that way. Now I need to figure out what I CAN do to keep myself out of gloomy town.

Any suggestions?

Volunteer. Become a Big Sister. Adopt an elderly person. Refocus that energy toward those with whom you will not have romantic feelings for.

sarahwho 12-28-2011 09:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Heavenleahangel (Post 480672)
Just popping in to say "Hi" to everyone! Been gone a while....

Me too! Thought I'd say hi again!

Leigh 12-28-2011 11:42 PM

Still single & hoping :)

Library_girl 12-29-2011 02:05 AM

Ditto
 
(Ditto to my friend Matthew......still single and still hoping!)

I've been away from the Planet for a few weeks so I had to drop in and say hello. Too much work, not enough time for myself.

ScandalAndy, I appreciate your post about loneliness, and I love Liam's suggestion. I struggle with loneliness too, sometimes, as I'm sure many of us do. I'm guessing lots of us nodded our heads as we read that post. The holiday season doesn't make it any easier, right? Since I don't have a partner to spoil with gifts, baking, other special holiday stuff, I just give all of that "holiday spirit" to my niece and nephew, my dad, my friends, my employees. And when it comes to just plain old loneliness, I try to focus on other things, like family, friends, pets, work, anything to keep the brain occupied. Liam's idea is much better, though! But when my time is short, I just have to keep my brain busy. There are times I just HATE being single. Sure, there are a few good things about being single, and I even have married friends who envy my "freedom", and so on. (whatever!) I will happily trade in those little "advantages" any time, any day, no hesitation.

Ok, enough rambling!

veryfemme 12-29-2011 02:53 AM

I know we are all single and looking for love but I am curious as to how many would actually relocate for a possible relationship? I moved for my recently failed relationship and I am looking to move back to my home area within a year to two years. Just a question I thought I'd throw out there.

Leigh 12-29-2011 03:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Library_girl
(Ditto to my friend Matthew......still single and still hoping!)

I've been away from the Planet for a few weeks so I had to drop in and say hello. Too much work, not enough time for myself.

ScandalAndy, I appreciate your post about loneliness, and I love Liam's suggestion. I struggle with loneliness too, sometimes, as I'm sure many of us do. I'm guessing lots of us nodded our heads as we read that post. The holiday season doesn't make it any easier, right? Since I don't have a partner to spoil with gifts, baking, other special holiday stuff, I just give all of that "holiday spirit" to my niece and nephew, my dad, my friends, my employees. And when it comes to just plain old loneliness, I try to focus on other things, like family, friends, pets, work, anything to keep the brain occupied. Liam's idea is much better, though! But when my time is short, I just have to keep my brain busy. There are times I just HATE being single. Sure, there are a few good things about being single, and I even have married friends who envy my "freedom", and so on. (whatever!) I will happily trade in those little "advantages" any time, any day, no hesitation.

Ok, enough rambling!

(((((((((((Library)))))))))))) I miss talking to My friend, I hope you are doing well sweetie ......... lets chat again sometime :rrose:

Quote:

Originally Posted by veryfemme
I know we are all single and looking for love but I am curious as to how many would actually relocate for a possible relationship? I moved for my recently failed relationship and I am looking to move back to my home area within a year to two years. Just a question I thought I'd throw out there.

I would definately consider moving for the right one. Right now I am registered for college and should graduate by the end of October 2012 so after that I am free to go where I want ~ this time would be perfect to get to know someone thus if I ever was to move I will know its right :)

spritzerJ 12-29-2011 09:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by veryfemme (Post 494095)
I know we are all single and looking for love but I am curious as to how many would actually relocate for a possible relationship? I moved for my recently failed relationship and I am looking to move back to my home area within a year to two years. Just a question I thought I'd throw out there.

I moved for a relationship that didn't work out. It was a spectacular fail. I don't think I'd relocate again. At least not the same way. I'd do it very differently if I could be convinced. I don't know if I will move back to my home area or not yet. We'll see. :rubberducky:

kannon 12-29-2011 09:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by veryfemme (Post 494095)
I know we are all single and looking for love but I am curious as to how many would actually relocate for a possible relationship? I moved for my recently failed relationship and I am looking to move back to my home area within a year to two years. Just a question I thought I'd throw out there.

I moved to my current location for a relationship. Before I moved, I got a pretty good job here. Even though the relationship failed, I tried to make the most of it, and give the city a chance. Six years later, I still don't like this area, and I'm planning on moving, but I am accomplishing some stuff: I bought a house and I'm going to complete my masters. I think I've made lemonade out of lemons.

I would do it all over again for the right woman. However, the next time, I will be more selective.

sarahwho 12-29-2011 10:25 PM

Probably wouldn't move. My parent's are here, work, my son's academy......sigh....then again, some day down the road, I might change my mind....it's been known to happen.

ScandalAndy 12-29-2011 10:26 PM

I've done it with disastrous consequences, but I would probably do it again after taking my sweet time making sure the person I'm considering doing it for would absolutely do the same for me. It's a respect thing.


Quote:

Originally Posted by veryfemme (Post 494095)
I know we are all single and looking for love but I am curious as to how many would actually relocate for a possible relationship? I moved for my recently failed relationship and I am looking to move back to my home area within a year to two years. Just a question I thought I'd throw out there.


atomiczombie 12-30-2011 12:23 AM

I can't move because I need to be close to my daughter. And my parents are elderly and need my help a lot too.

VintageFemme 12-30-2011 10:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by veryfemme (Post 494095)
I know we are all single and looking for love but I am curious as to how many would actually relocate for a possible relationship? I moved for my recently failed relationship and I am looking to move back to my home area within a year to two years. Just a question I thought I'd throw out there.

I did it once with disastrous results but then there were some very extreme circumstances that surrounded and led up to that relocation. Would I do it again? I don't know. I'm very rooted where I live but then I have done a lot less for love so, yeah I probably would .... if it were the right thing to do. Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

Julien 12-30-2011 11:07 AM

Would I move for a love relationship? I think I would if the circumstances were just right for me and her. Especially the job front. I think it would put undue burdens on the relationship if one of the couple has no job prospects. Am I being too realistic not a romantic? The question is how do we know when the circumstances are right? A lot of honest communication and visits. A bit of a reality check along with the romance of the relationship, that is where honesty comes in. I can dream can't I?

veryfemme 12-30-2011 11:39 AM

I think the job aspect is extremely important. I was lucky when I moved for someone I got an awesome job and that is what has kept me where I am, if not for the job I know for sure I would have moved back to be closer to my family. I guess the move question is the hardest of them all.

QueenofSmirks 12-30-2011 11:53 AM

I think the much bigger question is "What would it take for you to move?" The moving itself seems inconsequential if you have a great job lined up, you've spent every other weekend together for a year, and a continuous week twice in the last six months, and you're compatible, in love and the planets are aligned.

However, that rarely seems to be the case, and I'm continuously astonished at how quickly people move out of state for someone they've only spent a few days with real time. Yes, there are phone calls every day and tons of time online, but it boils down to a few days in real time, and that just isn't long enough to get to know someone, in my opinion. I think there are definitely success stories, but I also believe there was a lot of luck involved there, because again, how can you really make a truly informed and intelligent decision on whether to live with someone if you've only spent 10 or 20 or even 30 days of face-to-face time with them? I'm definitely not old fashioned - I'm just cautious. I'm also not someone who needs to be with someone; I'm perfectly happy being single, or just dating, so there is no driving force for me to want to live with someone, and the older I get, the more I appreciate my own space and don't want to live with anyone. Less fuss that way :)


Leigh 12-30-2011 11:55 AM

Just wanted to come in & say hello to everyone :)

veryfemme 12-30-2011 12:11 PM

Hiiii :) back

Quote:

Originally Posted by Matthew (Post 495047)
Just wanted to come in & say hello to everyone :)


sarahwho 01-01-2012 07:42 PM

Happy New Year to all!

Heavenleahangel 01-02-2012 08:32 AM

Just popping in to say "Hello" to all and wish everyone the happiest and healthiest of New Years!

atomiczombie 01-02-2012 10:38 AM

Happy New Year everyone! :)

VintageFemme 01-02-2012 10:59 AM

Happy New Year Everyone ♥ !!!

ScandalAndy 01-05-2012 10:01 AM

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! Let's get with the excellent newness!

Leigh 01-09-2012 12:40 PM

Hey everyone, just came in to wish all of My friends and fellow singles a fantastic 2012 :-)

**waves hello to veryfemme** :rrose:

TenderKnight 05-02-2012 12:57 PM

Hello, all :)

I have been away from this site for well over a year now, but thought I would swing on by and see what was happening.. Some may remember me and some may not, lol

I will refrain from posting a full out personal ad, but I am looking to date some folks.. Not really looking to move in with someone or move across country, lol.. But if you and I happen to be in the same area at the same time, coffee and conversation never hurt anyone, has it? :)

I see this thread has been a lil slow lately, but i will keep my eyes open :)

-Tony

Leigh 05-07-2012 07:58 AM

Not exactly in your area Tender, but figured I'd say hi anyways as well as to everyone else in the group :)

TenderKnight 05-08-2012 11:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Leigh (Post 580038)
Not exactly in your area Tender, but figured I'd say hi anyways as well as to everyone else in the group :)

Well hello, Leigh :) Thanks for the "hi".. Where in Canada are you? I visited the East Coast of Canada a few years back, never been to the West Coast..

Leigh 05-13-2012 10:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TenderKnight
Well hello, Leigh :) Thanks for the "hi".. Where in Canada are you? I visited the East Coast of Canada a few years back, never been to the West Coast..


I'm actually in the middle of the country, in Manitoba, where we are getting absolutely gorgeous weather! I had a nice walk this afternoon, the sun was shining and while it was warm I enjoyed just getting out of the house ~ hopefully your getting nice weather in your neck of the woods too :)

TenderKnight 05-13-2012 11:35 PM

:) Leigh, it was actually very nice weather today.. Even got to go for a swim in the ocean for a bit, first time this year.. Have to admit, the water was COLD, lol. Glad you got to get out and enjoy your day :)

Leigh 05-13-2012 11:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TenderKnight
:) Leigh, it was actually very nice weather today.. Even got to go for a swim in the ocean for a bit, first time this year.. Have to admit, the water was COLD, lol. Glad you got to get out and enjoy your day :)


It'll be nice to be near the water this summer, though I burn easily so I'd better make sure I keep alot of sunscreen around or I'll be a lobster lol ~ I did very much enjoy my day thank you, I'm glad you enjoyed yours too :)

Kent 06-12-2012 10:30 AM

Just a little Bump...

Licious 06-12-2012 06:53 PM

*giving a curvy nudge to bump*

Licious 06-13-2012 08:27 PM

Hmmm.. should I specify what I am looking for? Friends first, dating if we are sympatico, down the road if it is right, much more. Butch over 45, smart, compassionate, cuddly. Partially disabled or health issue a plus, we would both be moving a bit slower... but together. Must like femmes.


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 05:00 PM.

ButchFemmePlanet.com
All information copyright of BFP 2018