Not a FTM but as a trans I think I should bump this thread now that I am single and looking. I am 45 for those that don't know me just call me Alix. I am going to refrain from putting out a whole what I am looking for post. Just a hi and where are all the single ladies?

Single lady here. :)

Just read some of the past few pages, and wanted to comment on the distance/moving issue.

I have seen it work for someone to move literally halfway around the world (CA to Finland, to be exact) to be with somebody that they had spent little time with in person. But I really think that that's the exception.

I'm 53, have a great job that would be hard to replace, have a pension with that job which is almost impossible to find these days (and at my age in this economy, that's priceless), and my grands (who I've raised/helped praise for most of their lives) live here and I'm not willing to move a long distance away from them.

Unfortunately for me there are basically no known single butchs/Transguys/FTMs in this area. I could date someone from the Philadelphia, Baltimore, or DC areas and only be a couple hours away, but that's still becomes a big issue if we would end up getting serious and want to start living together.

I know that this can become an issue even if you live in a big city, but when you're in a much smaller area, you really run out of choices fast.

Been a while since I have been here...still single and patiently looking and waiting. Life is good!

I did say it was thread bumping night.....
 

Because there is no transguy or queer single thread.

I know some of you know me or have seen me around some of the threads this year but for those that do not I thought a little intro was in order. Especially since I change my avatar and about me on a regular basses..like when I am bored.

My name is Alix, I am 45, and very single but not looking to settle for just anyone. I am okay with being single just no longer wish to be. I am not a FTM, I fall more into what one thread on here called the "Bravehearts". A TG guy that can not or choose not to transition. I am also a Top/Dom/Daddy even though I do not use the BDSM avatar and my about me does not say it...at this present moment.
The most important thing and or quality a person can have is respect whether they are my friend or that special someone that caught my eye. All else develops from respect and time in my opinion.

I did read some of last years conversation on relocating. Since I live in the middle of the country and everyone seems to be to the left or right of me this is something I have put a great deal of thought into. I have done and have been successful in LDR. The successful ones I did relocate for that person but not until a lot had taken place. One of which was time and considerable communication. One is real time together. The length of real time before I relocated is not set in stone and with the advent and popularity of Skype will vary. (I need more Skype friends and I was referring to non sexual Skype btw). So the question is not will I relocate but will make me relocate? To answer that I would have to say many things would and one of them would be my ability to answer the "what if" question. What if it does not work? Since I am getting older and already know I do not want to live in my hometown anymore the answer to my what if question will determine if I can take the relocate step. Relocate does not equal move in...two different questions.

Well I tend to be long winded and ramble a lot when I am nervous, so if you would like to no more feel free to post here, on my wall, or send me a message.

Now where are all the singles that like a guy like me? I know your out there!!!

we are all over the place....here.....and in the world. I honestly have not seen this thread until now...

Found it last night....
 

oh gaea I know your all over the place here and in the world...hence why I post everywhere..LOL...

I know I found this thread last night and instead of making a separate single mingle thread again I thought why not use this one??? I found if it is on the front page of the site people tend to visit...
I have no problem making a separate single thread btw if others would like me to.

Late night bump...for those of us up after midnight....

where in my home stater are you from???? I hail from Peoria originally :) even though i have been here a very long time i stall say Back Home when talking about Illinois

Cool to find this, thank you for the bump. I didn't see this thread when I joined last month, then again, there's hardly any activity - pathetic! There are more singles around, I'm sure of it.

I hail from Rockford, the big city with the small town attitude, that is stuck in a time warp while having an identity crises *laugh*

I know Peoria well and I would kill to be able to say Back Home and mean Illinois again. I keep escaping this town but coming back...I think to let go of another unwanted or unneeded piece so that I can finally say Back Home for good...

rockford? where is that near? sounds familiar....I have a lot of family still in Illinois...peoria, Chicago and up near iowa....just over the bridge.

I agree Hominid I know there are more singles around here. I think it might be the title of the thread *shrugs* who knows. Then again unless we keep it on the front page of the site or near the top no one will find it. Took me over 6 months to find it I just knew there had to be a non butch/femme single thread. Now if we can only find the singles and get them to start posting in here *laugh*

Rockford is about 1 hr and 30 minutes west of Chicago 20 minutes south of Beloit Wisconsin. About dead center of the state and as north as you can get without going into Wisc. territory.

that sounds like its cold there.....*shudders at the thought of snow* headed to the pool now :) (yes its a hundred degrees here)

Not cold yet....but it will be and I so do not want to be here when the 80 below windchill factor hits...it was bad enough with the humidity of this past summer...it is not going to be fun...but it is Fall and one of my favorite seasons so trying to enjoy it....I am now official jealous gaea pool and 100 degree sounds nice....

it is very nice especially on my skin

personally I would be house bound with a fire going at the 80 below windchill lmao..funny my auntie never worked during the winter time as she refused to drive in the snow .....I imagine I would be much the same as her. lol

Well it is a good way to get killed especially that first snow fall all the drivers in the city *blink* and loose their ability to drive in something they have driven years in....but snow is not the worse it is the ice covered by snow especially when the city runs out of salt and plow money...happens every year...I so have to get out of this state *laugh* for many reasons that being one

Screw all singles, I just want more women!

I really had it in my head that I would have a snuggly and someone for whom to build a fire this fall/winter. I guess the snuggly remains the boxer and I'll build the fire for the parrot and save a tree at Christmas time. Ho hum and Bah Humbug.

Hang in there, Hominid. You never really know when that special person is going to come into your life.

!
 

Evening everyone...first day of the week and first day of the month...three months left in this year....anyone have Halloween plans...one of the times I wish I had children and the best memories I have of walking my nieces and nephews around...except is almost always rains here that night and is usually so cold by then that the kids have to wear coats over the costumes....I haven't decided if I am doing anything this year but I am sure I will do something...anyone else....I will at least hit the pumpkin and apples that are every where right now...

Hi to morningstar, Heavenleangel, leigh, and Hominid, Kent...and anyone else I forgot

Rambling Property Woes -
 

Retaining my sense of humor ...

An opossum was brought in by the dogs last night ... I thought it was an old, wet stuffed animal and I got really close and it was a young one, and it moved a leg - so I flipped out, got help from a friend who visits once a year (thank God bigger than me) and hid behind her ... when we returned it was gone. Damn, those things are nasty so I was even more ascared! Finally found it on the couch, my brave butch friend let me hide behind her while she gathered it and took it to the woods.

I can handle all modes/forms of dying people ... not animals. A bit of transference?

This morning, young, dead squirrel by my truck when I went to work.
And this evening, one of the dogs broke through a window on the garage trying to get to the birds in a nest which was built in the garage because I never close the door ...

Weird goings on ...

Yeah I sometimes get that way around the holidays with not having anyone, but when its the right time someone will come into your life and it'll be amazing :)

Everyone has someone out there for them, and as hard as it can be to keep the faith (i know that too well), we just have to know someone is out there waiting for us too :)

Aww I know ~ its so easy to adopt that way of thinking but with the holidays around the corner, I know atleast for me I can't stay in that mood too long!

Evening now morningstar, but I hope you had a good day :)

i still can't decide what i am gonna do but its too bad You didn't live closer Alix, You could help me to give out the candy cuz i will likely be giving the candy out alone this year booooooooooo lol :p

At least I can work for other people who have their kids and families at home - my Christmas gift to my amazing peers.

My biggest problem in meeting people is my work schedule. And being an introvert. And living in such a queer-strong area -sort of. Grown up queers/FtM's, etc. are few - it's very traditionally crunchy at my age. I lean towards slightly younger women, and that generation (early 30's) is more butch-femme ... or bisexual women. Lots and lots of bisexual women. But it seems they are more interested in EITHER a born male or a woman ... dick or no dick seeming to be the focus. BUT ... in you're in your early 20's and FtM, you have it made. Very much known and femmes are very interested. I'm not sure how that will look at those cute boys become balding, hairy men ...

Anyway, it's really odd to be in such a queer friendly place and just disappear into the liberal masses as an apparent cis-male. When I flirt with "my type" - slightly andro women, strong straight women, or funky tattooed geeks, I am looked at like I'm nuts. I wonder if this at all parallels the experience of the "invisible femme". Then again, I just want to move in the world at large as male, even though I'm not sure how I would announce what is in my pants or how I was born.

More prattling ... trying to keep the board going more than whining ... no dead animals in 12 hours!

It definitely gets 'interesting', Hominid, having to have that 'talk' with someone that you are interested in, when you tell them that you are ts, and what that implies. I've had to do it once, with a male, so far, and he completely lost interest at that point. A pity, but it is a lot better response then what could have happened.

well now i want a BFP halloween party with a bonfire!

I have to say something.....
 

The bolded section may be your experience, but I just want to say there are femmes (including my young fine twentysomething femme self) that care a lot more about than c*ck/No c*ck.

I've been partnered with one of those young twentysomething (very hot) transguys, that you think may have it made. Please talk to these guys. Talk on this site. Just to see if their experiences validate your opinion.

We all have a tough road... femmes that feel invisible and trans men that don't pass. Men that deal with the exact issues you speak of. It might not change how you feel, but you might find some people to share your experiences with. Maybe they'll hook you up with a hottie tattoo'ed geek they know. As a trans-sensual femme, believe me the dating scene is no easier on us. I feel/have felt like I need a sign on my forehead.

Maybe you should try talking to some queer Id'ed or pansexual/sapiosexual/ whatever new beautiful word-- some of these ladies have. Gender identity for femmes/females is just as varied as with the trans community.

And, as a woman, I would hope that my love for my partner would surpass any barrier. I will someday not be my young fabulous self, and I would hope that my man would want me JUST the same. Love is all encompassing. Lust is just the physical.

Nice step off for some discussion!

Adding my voice...
 

Alix, Leigh - Thanks both. I'm not sure I suggested I don't talk to lots of femmes/butches/FtM's - but to keep my reply succinct (not very good at this) - I talk to all sorts of people, and glean my opinion/experience of this area from that in particular, which is why I have thoughts about the experiences of some of the different gender presentations and identities and what they experience compared to myself. I know far fewer FtM's - my friends are on different parts of the queer spectrum, from butch lesbian bottoms to femme tops.
As you pointed out in bold, this is my experience, a generalization of the gender politics and identities and how different generations move within the continuum and relate where I live.

Another Saturday night ...
 

Just popping my head in ... there's an echo!