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It wasn't today but yesterday
I was in NH and passed a self storage place and the sign out front read " hoarders welcomed here" that was funny in itself then I read the name of the place its call "why self storage". I Damm near lost my drink |
baby brother -vs- big brother
baby brother = 4 yr old
big brother = 7 yr old setting : restaurant 4 yr old running in behind Dad : Daddy I get to sit with you!! Daddy I GET TO SIT WITH YOU!! hey! I get to sit with Daddy! ! (all 3 go to buffet ...the kids return first) 4 yr old to brother : I get to sit with Daddy. 7 yr old: that's ok. You're not cool. When you get older you'll be cool and cool kids don't sit with their dad. 4 yr old ( in sad whimper) Daddy says I'm a big boy and I'm cool..Daddy says I'm a big boy! 7 yr old: you're not cool 4 yr old: I'm a big boy! I'm 4 and a big boy! 7 yr old: I'm 7 ... I'm 3 and a half times older than you and I'm cooler than you! 4 yr old whimper: I'm cool . poor baby brother ... he has a few years before he can tar-n-feather his bully big brother |
A friend sharing a funny story - still laughing.
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at work yesterday.. rollin' along in the security golf cart going down a hill with my mentor and thought we were gonna bif it. LOL!
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I am LOVING the new Geico commercials! The happier than a witch in a broom factory type ones...there was a new one on the other day....I just sooo look forward to them
That and the Discover card commercials. We treat you the way you would treat you...lol omg....I totally did it! Yes, I'm easily amused...I'm ok with that |
I think my car is possessed ...
just arrived home. turned off engine ...listening to rain while playing on BFP...doors still closed...keys laying next to me, suddenly the interior lights come on with no prompting or buttons hit... *raises eyebrow* crazy Beast! |
Cracked me up
This song Online-Brad Pasley (the stuff people believe) LOL!
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I'm back in here again... Another grandbaby story but not my grandson. Instead it's my oldest granddaughter (2 months shy of being 2yo) that lives in SC.
I had a conversation with my daughter this evening that was fun and holy crap I miss her so.... Anyway................ Mckenna: mommy? daughter: what? McKenna: I don't know. *giggle* Mckenna: mommy? daughter: what? McKenna: I don't know. *giggle* Mckenna: mommy? daughter: what? McKenna: I don't know. *giggle* daught: of course you don't. you didn't know any other time either. :sigh: :rofl: Maybe not what was being said but how my daughter said... I loved that moment of laughter with her. She is such a momma!! :D |
While watching the wild critters feed this morning I saw a squirrel come down the tree, cross over the edges of a resin doghouse, two steps to cross a 5 gallon bucket, then to the ground.
As he got to the ground he jumped straight up about a foot high, arching his back in the air as if in pain. I watched him do this probably 8 times very quickly. There are a few briars over there so I thought maybe each time he landed he was landing on a briar. I kept watching and realized he was playing with a bird. A tiny little bird. I kept watching for a bit, jumping squirrel, flittering bird, back and forth back and forth. Finally 2 more squirrels came racing down the tree and game over. They were twitterpated, one chasing the other then about face and the chaser became the chased. |
I woke up at 2 a.m. and brought the laptop to bed with me, so I could watch Modern Family reruns. Yes, they cracked me up!
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a damn jumping spider! !! I'm surprised Blade hasn't posted about it!
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the first time you laughed and said "there's no spiders in my truck "... the second time you laughed, I SHOULD have jumped in the driver's seat! *sassy femme stance * you're still a jerk for laughing ps.. you're right ...few things make me scream...not even the snake in your kitchen. but spiders in your truck ....*shivers * |
hiding in a wet cardboard box
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Gaige doing a back flip on the bed, landing on the other side on her feet, and then mooning me. All in 3.7 seconds. It "cracked" me up...
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Hearing her reaction when I said that we might be fighting over closet space... :rofl:
She won the most closet space argument.. Ha ha no arguement to be had. I didn't stand a chance. :blink: She really got to laughing over that - I didn't know I was comedian!! :superfunny: |
haha
Today while shaving my scruffy face , I had my music blasting and my wife comes in and sits down watching me .
This was one of those you had to be there moments to get the funny factor. Shes 27 and Im 37 so a lil Generation gap : My woman : baby, what in the heck are you Listening to ? Me: psychedelic furs My woman : who ? Me : baby this music is the best , They were a great band New Song My woman : Geez , what is this Song now , its horrible Me : dollbabe , this is the smiths now and what are you talking about , this Song is awesome Now im in the shower and I say ... Baby i know you m know this Song ( it was by aha ) My woman : baby , Youre such an old man ( as She is laughing ) My woman : OH LORD JESUS , BABY IS THAT A SYNTHASIZOR AND KEYBOARDS IN THE BACKGROUND !!!!!!!!! Haha it was funny really if you heard the convo in person |
Convo with my son. He's always been the techie in our family, since he was 12...
me: So, I goofed and deleted all my images from a host site that I use. son: And what happened? me: Well, let me explain that my OCD kicked in and I just had to clean and organize damnit. son: Do you normally use the images anywhere else on the internet? me: *lowers my head in shame* Yes. son: Lemme guess, all the places you left your images now have a 404 error? me: *lowering my head again* Yes. son: Aw mom, you're one of those people! I thought I trained you better than that. *walks away laughing and pointing his finger* :pointing: I love that kid!! :D |
Cracked
Looking in the mirror. My hair is a mess. Then asking myself is a butch supposed to be so concerned with hys hair. (lol)
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"Cops" ............. :|
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Convo with one of the girls at the shelter...
her: we need to get you out and find you a man! (with emphasis on man) me: ummmm not sure my girlfriend would appreciate that too much. her: I have nothing *walked away* Whaaaaaaaat?? :blink: Do I not look butch enough?? Really?? And the rainbow charm on my necklace isn't a dead giveaway?? Lmao!! :superfunny: |
Inner dialogue....
Yes it was conversation with myself inside my head..... :blink:
me: damn this new shampoo smells great *sniffs open bottle* me: *squirts shampoo in my hand* It's such a dark green me: whaaaaaat the hell? *scrubs in hair and feels granules of something" me: oh fuck I bet a bought facial scrub!! me: oh well my hair feels great after this rinse me: *reads the bottle* ahahahaaaaaaaaaa it's shampoo with granules in it for a deep cleansing us: score!!! :superfunny: |
Our gigantic cat, Bud, trying to fit his big ol' self (17lbs!!) into the tiny opening left when I didn't close the dresser drawer all the way....lol
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Well A friend told me this..Had to share.
Him: I am so glad that I have the day off from work because of the Holiday Out of state friend : Oh yeah ? I didn't know there was a Holiday today, What holiday is it? Him: It's Patriots Day! it's a state holiday. Out of state friend : Wow! Cool! That's awesome you all have a holiday for your football team! The funny thing about this to me was the out of state friend was from my home state. lol |
It cracked us both up. A conversation with a customer yesterday..
Her..last time I came in you all gave me good luck when I went to Vegas. I came home with money. So I'm hoping I get luck today. Me..good! I hope you do! Your going again? Her...yes, to a * mythology* convention. Me..oh that sounds interesting. Do some people dress up ? ( me, thinking of Star Wars, Star Trek conventions) Her...( strange look on her face)...dress up like a kidney? Me...oh...I thought you said mythology . Her...no...nephrology, kidney specialization . Us...laughing Her...but mythology would be more fun! |
Cracked you up
I crack myself up! But dont worry folks I dont talk to myself and answer. (lol)
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Cracked you up
Climbing trees like im still a kid! I quess its true what they say the older you get the more risks your willing to take. (lol)
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Cracked you up
My buddy called me said listen to this song Mr Know it all-Kelly Clarkson. I sent this song to my ex because she thought she knew it all!(lol) Hy sang the song too but said Ms. Kyle is a nut !
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So I have some asparagus soaking in ice water, 'cause I'm going to steam some with dinner. One of my super rotten kitties, just ZOOOMED across the table, snagged a spear of asparagus on the way past and shot up to the top of the kitty tower, where she proceeded to beat the poor thing into submission. :seeingstars:
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More Kid Wisdom....
"If I was a girl I swear I would stand in front of the mirror and stare at my boobs all day long!" :superfunny: OMG I 'bout fell out of my chair laughing so hard... He on the otherhand had a dead pan look on his face! :| Reason #5893453 as to why I freakin' love my job!! :D |
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That sucked for your dinner but really made me laugh! :D |
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Reminding myself that actions speak louder then words....lol got a good reminder and chuckle from this.
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BDP's description of work today - "I was running around like a head with its chicken cut off!"
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It has been cool and damp here in NC for the past 2 weeks. We have had a few days in the low 70's, but for the most part in the low 60's. It was in the low 60's today and breezy and it was gusty between the buildings as my boss and I took a Cushman ride to the nurses office. We were joking back and forth about the nurses need to see me. Out of the blue he says, damn it's chilly, I'm not sure if we suddenly sprung into October or if we fell back into March.
For some reason that struck my funny bone, I got a good laugh out of it and as the day went on I several of my coworkers thought it was funny as well. I'm not sure if we suddenly sprung into October or if we fell back into March |
What cracked me up today, you ask? :superfunny:
The staff huddled around my computer monitor and the topic of discussion being - passive agressive and how come it cannot be aggressive passive. :eatinghersheybar: When you have five women standing around at the end of the day mocking possible "agressive passive" mannerisms all you can do is smirk, sip your coolatta and keep typing.... because really and truly deep down inside you just wanna laugh and point :pointing: and join in the fun... but you're the only one left actually working!! :mohawk: :rofl: It was a super fun way to end the day!! |
A femme friend who is ordinarily quite proper is currently quite medicated, having had surgery a few days ago. Today, she used the word "snatch". That cracked me up.
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The joys of motherhood
A text conversation
Me...How is the Christmas Elf? Don't you want a few more? LBH...She's better, when she quit having fever, the rash went away and she hasn't had anymore seizures. Me...Praise the Lord! That's great! LBH...Yeah, but I tell ya, she took 5 yrs off my life Me...chuckling...honey she is only 2. She will take 5 yrs off your life many more times before she is grown, so you better figure out a way to make those increments narrower. Like maybe 1 or 2 yrs off your life at the time. LBH...HUH? Chuckles...she has a genius level IQ and no common sense...it went right over her head. |
a resident who neva jokes "pullin' my leg". it was hysterical once i got what he was doin'...
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