|
My AARP magazine has an article that says 31% of people between the ages of 50-55 are helping support or completely supporting an adult child. That's really scary.
|
Quote:
|
One quarter of the U.S. population live in food insecure households. I am sure older people are contributing to their children's and grandchildren's income. Who wouldn't?
There used to be jobs that would employ people at a wage which could keep them going, but they are gone. http://graphics8.nytimes.com/images/...wage-jumbo.jpg |
Quote:
A little stuff here and there can add up to hundreds of dollars. Her brothers cell phone alone costs us $360.00 a year. Thankfully he finally took a job and the contract on his phone runs out this next month and he has been informed that at 48 years old he will need to go and get his own phone. |
Quote:
So many of my co-workers are completely hardened to the stories from people calling for payment arrangements on their utility bills. Yes, there are the deadbeats, but there is also a huge group of people who are working their asses off, and only barely treading water. Some of them formerly had a good income, owned their own homes, and had savings accounts, before their company laid them off, and/or sent jobs out of this country. It sickens me. Honestly, as a home owner, working full time, at a pretty decent wage, with all the bells and whistles of good benefits, there are times when I struggle. So, I can only imagine what folks are experiencing while working more than one minimum wage job, without any health care benefits, and still not coming close to my yearly income. I've heard people who have grown up with privilege, comment that some people just don't make good investment decisions, and their responsible for that, but I ask you...What the hell do they have at the end of the day to invest in their future, or their children's future? Nada. As for the subject of the thread... If you look at cultures in some other countries, it is normal for an entire family to share one dwelling, its inhabitants' expenses, cost of upkeep, and responsibilities. Whether there are 5 people or, 15 people in the household, they share expenses/responsibility. In my experience, the problem I hear about from a lot of my customers, is that adult children are moving back home, and expecting a free ride. That even if they are working, they are not making any effort to pay their way (while sitting home on the internet, blasting heating/AC to ridiculous comfort levels, and enjoying 30+ minute hot showers twice a day). This is something that really ticks me off, I do not have any respect for people who feel entitled to take advantage of family members, roommates, or government programs. When it is parents allowing this to happen, I think the blame goes both ways. In other words, I feel that they have a responsibility to their children to cut the cord with firm intention. My parents sent me to the school of hard knocks. If I fail, I am the one responsible for picking myself up, dusting my ass off, and being responsible for fixing my own financial issues. They taught me that my choices led to certain results, some good, some very bad. At times, when I struggled, this seamed heartless and unfair of my parents. But, what I learned by experiencing hard times, is that I'm not entitled to shit, unless I earn it. So, I am grateful to my parents for expecting me to rely on myself, and take responsibility for my own life. |
I believe a lot of our housing choices going forward are going to be dictated by the economy. It is already been pointed out here that a "living" wage is getting harder and harder to come by. Whether is it adult children moving back in with their parents, or parents in their later years moving in with their children.
There are some other strategies being floated out there such as the Northern European concept of co-housing. There are a few of these communities being built here in the states, primarily in the west, and it is interesting to watch. These come in many forms be they small village type communities with people and families of all ages, or what is being built in my community right now which is more like a co-op/condo set up specifically as an elder co-housing community. In an earlier post I spoke a little bit about multigenerational housing and how a lot of it is showing up on my own Main street. Shrinking wages or shrinking hours and benefits on higher wage jobs combined with what in some areas are absolutely bizarre real estate prices, something has to give. Right now a 3bd/2ba home on my street starts at $750K. Generally speaking, it takes more than two wage earners to pay that kind of mortgage. The original premise of this thread was more towards irresponsible children looking for a free or partial ride. I'm glad that some people have stepped in to provide a variety of viewpoints. I think the other side of that coin is going to be seen as irresponsible parents, non-savers or those who could not, as well as some folks who had their financial ass handed to them just a few years ago and don't have enough time to make up for it, looking for a partial or full ride from their family in their elderly years. In that situation there's little hope that the elderly parent is going to be getting off their butt and finding gainful employment. I don't have any answers, I am just looking out our economy as it stands and looking for some of those answers. I suspected shared housing and pooled resources in a wide range of formats will start playing more of a role in this country in the coming years. |
Quote:
Quote:
My manager raised his two kids to live high on the hog. The son had his own landscaping/lawn business, the daughter had a 4 yr RN degree. When the economy tanked, they were way over their 28 and 30 year old heads in debt. Huge houses, fine cars, all the big boy toys, he helped support both of their families, so they wouldn't all want to move home or lose everything they had. |
Quote:
And a lot of people lost jobs in the recession. The jobs they got after that were not as good. Those who didn't lose their homes are living close to the edge. Bill Moyers does a good piece on this nearly every month. Millions and millions of Americans barely pay their bills every month. And getting a job over 50? That is unbelievably hard for most people even in high demand fields. |
I have to completely agree with Martina's post. I've lived it. My Grandma, retired from the state, at age 62. They continued to pay her medical insurance, and retirement until she died 2 yrs ago.
Mom worked for a company for 25 yrs and they folded, she was laid off at 63 yrs old, no company retirement, and 401 wasn't matched. She took a job at $5 an hour less for a few years before she got social security but it took her a while to find that job. My best friend worked for the same company and was laid off as well she was 53 she just got a job this week. She took it for the benefits, the pay is much less than a managers pay. My company use to pay for employee and dependent insurance. They no longer pay for either but do pay half of employee. Also as of 2007 anyone hired after 2007 does not get a retirement check from the company. I surely don't live as high on the hog as I once could afford to, due to company cut backs and the addition of having to pay my own insurance. Has anyone mentioned the price of gas. My gosh I think it has doubled since my pay was cut and they sure don't add that into your cost of living raise. Guess that is another thread though. So IMO Martina's post is spot on. |
Quote:
I was highlighting some of the seemingly answerless problems we are facing. I was saying the same thing as you are here as an "other side of the coin", how a younger person could see it. It's hard to convey tone in text. |
I come from a place of at least partial understanding.
I worked in one industry and was well rewarded for nearly 25 years. The bottom fell out of that so I went to college and reinvented myself for a shiny new career that lasted 8 years at less than half the pay. I am now faced with reinventing myself for a third time. This time with medical challenges, no insurance, and over 50 years of age. I have no family to call on. I am trying to understand multiple perspectives and options (or lack thereof), not making light of anyones situation. |
Just happen to come across this thread and had to chuckle a bit.
Ten yrs ago when my life was upside down Mom wanted me to sell my house and move in with her. I was like ummmm NO WAY! Then about 5 yrs ago when my hours and pay was drastically cut and the recession had set in good, she again was all but begging me to move back home. Again NO WAY! My sister has had some unexpected issues this year. She makes very little money and didn't want to over extend herself getting an apartment and turning on power water etc.. My parents offered her to move home. OMG the first week Mom and Sis kept my phone text messages busy. Moma did this or said that, Do you remember way back (30 yrs)?, Then Mom would start, sis didn't do this and she said that. OMG it was like refereeing children. Funniest thing was last weekend. My sister 46 yrs old....texts me and says check this out. It was a text from Mom that said, please be home before 9:30 tonight, I'm tired and going to bed early and I don't want the dog to wake me up barking when you come in. ROFLMAO!!!! So as for adult children moving home. It can be quite a challenge for parents and the adult child. Rules if any should be discussed up front. |
I can honestly say that I am lucky in a way and not so much in a way.
My oldest son earns more than I do... solidly 6 figures. My middle son does construction and, with his side jobs, does well. My youngest (21) is still planning on going to school but right now he works full time for barely above min wage. I would be in HEAVEN if my boys came home. All of them, their girlfriends/wives and my beautiful granddaughter would be welcomed with open arms. I wouldn't even care if they paid anything (I got it).... It is the best feeling in the world to have those you love under one roof. |
At 38, right now and for the last few years of my life, I live at home with my parents. They are in their late 60's. Mom is retired and dad still works. They semi support me due to the simple fact I can't get a job and the government has screwed me over on my SSDI, 3 times now.
Do I help around the house, yes. I do the work they can't do at the moment. Rules smules as long as nothing illegal is going on, there are no rules but I do give them enough respect as to let them know where I am and what goes on, just as they tell me what goes on. So maybe seeing it from an adult child may give you some perspective as to how some people have no other choice. |
| All times are GMT -6. The time now is 12:00 AM. |
ButchFemmePlanet.com
All information copyright of BFP 2018