BUMP
 

Used the restroom at work on the main floor.
Somehow I tucked the back of my skirt in my panties.
I rode the elevator up to the 3rd floor and walked through the office bldg with my ass hanging out.

New office nickname: peaches

WHen i was a banking officer my first account was the banks mulit million dollar supermarket chain.

The name was *Smith Family Giant Supermarkets*

i sent a letter to the CEO introducing myself and sent.... their months reconcilement..... only in my typing i left out the E in Supermarket. It somehow came out as

Smith Family Giant Sperm Market

:|


He called to correct me and for 10 years that account was known as dee's Sperm Market account.

*bump*
*bump*
:)

My best friend was having her 50th birthday party in Ft Lauderdale. My partner and I went and of course didn't bring everything we needed, nor did we discover everything we needed the first or second time we went to the local K-Mart (I think it was a K-Mart.)

On this third trip, we bought a friend who'd adopted my partner. I'm at one end of a very long shoe aisle with the friend. My partner is at the other end of the very long shoe aisle. I hear my partner say: "Hey Eileen, you'll never guess who's here?" I turn and say to he, "Who?" She says, "My dad!" I say, "Not if he's got two arms he's not."

Backstory: I've not met her father, but I do know he's about 6 foot tall with silver hair. His left arm was amputated about 20 years ago.

Out from behind the end of the shoe rack steps a man, about 6 foot tall with silver hair. He takes one more step out, and his left arm sleeve is missing, as is his arm. I have just met my father-in-law. My face never even got red. It went straight from fair complected to purple in a nano-second. I turned around and just started walking.

When my partner could finally talk, after getting control of her laughter, she said, "Honey, that's not my dad. Gotcha!" The gentleman standing next to her was chuckling.

She just couldn't resist when she spotted him (she has a radar for left arm amputees.) She asked him if it would be okay; he thought it was funny.

This was 13 years ago. My partner/wife and I divorced last year. She's still waiting for payback. I still haven't found the perfect opportunity for that, but I keep looking.

Getting to my Oncology appointment and being asked by the Dr if she can examine me for lumps in my lymph nodes and realising I left the house with
no knickers on.......:|

In my defence I was freshly showered and moisturising my legs when the door knocked, I slipped my dress on quickly and ran down to answer and then was doing three things at once, as you do, left the house in a rush and didnt realise until I was hopping on the couch.

Only above the waste I tell her sheepishly. OK she smiles with a puzzled look.

This morning I accidentally signed an important business email with “Best retards” instead of “Best regards”. Didn’t realize it until it was too late. :sigh:

Sorry to hear about the faux pas.... but...

Too funny, thanks for sharing this, ...morning laugh.