Butch Femme Planet

Butch Femme Planet (http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/forum/index.php)
-   The Fluffy Stuff: Flirting, Humor, Chat (http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/forum/forumdisplay.php?f=17)
-   -   What Cracked You Up Today? (http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/forum/showthread.php?t=525)

JustBeingMe 05-19-2010 12:45 PM

Reading some of the posts in the TMI Thread that was started today. :superfunny::huhlaugh::cracked::rofl:

Lady Pamela 05-19-2010 08:56 PM

My two 3 year old grandsons were playing a game,

WHO COULD STUFF THE MOST POPCORN KERNELS IN EACH NOSTRAL!!!

This of course resulted in an er trip to make sure they were all out.

But they were trying to originally put em in..hold the one side of the nose,
Then blow em out...the game was who could do it further.....sheeesh!

Never a dull moment!...lol

evolveme 05-19-2010 09:18 PM

Anjelah Johnson - Nail Salon
 

Blade 05-20-2010 06:45 PM

:flasher:ICE in the hot tub:shocking::cracked::rofl:

SuperFemme 05-20-2010 10:04 PM


Niceguy 05-21-2010 02:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PinkieLee (Post 108986)
Talking with my honey about the Reunion and what she wants to do while she is in Little Rock. Her answer.... go see the Duggars (from 19 kids and counting). :huhlaugh:

OH MY GAY ~ too much reality tv.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Medusa (Post 109756)
They are actually renting a house that is about 4 miles from the hotel :)

Wanna go on a widdle field trip?! :happyjump:



Sorry for the disappointing news, but the Duggars are no longer in Little Rock. Their new baby was recently released from Children's Hospital and they moved back home to Springdale (NW Arkansas) this week! :(

I did have a couple of brief encounters with them while they were in town though. The first one was during the Little Rock Marathon. The house they were renting just happened to be at mile 10, and the whole family was volunteering at the drink/snack table set up in front of their house. I stopped for some water/gatorade, and also grabbed a few of their Jolly Ranchers candy! :thumbsup:

A couple of weeks after that, I was house/dog sitting for some friends who live two houses down from where they were staying in the historic district. As I was walking the dog that Saturday morning, all of the little kids were out playing in the yard. They all said a big "Hi" and admired the dog as I walked by! I felt compelled to walk by their house every evening, hoping the family would be out in the yard... like they were big celebrities or something! :cheesy:

Mitmo01 05-21-2010 05:21 AM

omfg this is sooooo funny
 

Gemme 05-21-2010 10:30 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by evolveme (Post 110319)

This has been one of my favorite bits EVER for a while now. Love it!

Soon 05-24-2010 06:31 PM


Mitmo01 05-24-2010 06:46 PM

hahahahaha omg i love wanda
 



hahaha "little kids are runnin away from it" lololol

"either you or a gorilla" lolol

Corkey 05-24-2010 08:12 PM

Mowing.....ohh look a chipmunk, a rabbit, and a person on a riding mower...rabbit stops, I stop, chipmunk takes off.....riding mower misses the whole scene.

Kenna 05-25-2010 03:22 PM

"Yep, I'm a High Power Priss with Power Tools!"
 
How Funny Is This?
I was cleaning out ANOTHER box..this one had red letters on the outside that said "My Dresser"... I found some "girly girl" stuff from years ago, a PART of my dresser (wood that needs glued back on), a couple candles.... AND.... :superfunny: A "New & Improved TruGrip Oil Filter Wrench". :blink: :blink: :cheesy:

Typical me... what can I say?

Kenna 05-26-2010 08:11 PM

Hard work really does pay off...
 


:greendollar: :greendollar: :greendollar: :greendollar: :greendollar: :greendollar: :greendollar: :greendollar: :greendollar: :greendollar:

Yesterday...
Up to my ears cleaning out several HUGE boxes of very old paperwork...filling one bag for the shredder and Lawn/Leaf bags for trash... I found a crisp dollar bill... I was tickled that I found money, but I even checked to see if it was real, or a color copy... it WAS real, so I chuckled and said "gee, that's nice, coffee money!! I wonder if I'll find a HUNDRED dollar bill on the bottom?"

Today...
I cleaned out more junk with the hopes of finding that Hundred bucks!

I got A LOT done!!!!

I didn't find it.... but found my forgotten stash of REALLY old Wheat Back Pennies and favorite old coins.

I think I'll mount that 1$ in a frame as a reminder why I shouldn't hoard OLD paperwork... even if it is about medical stuff like insurance EOBs and YEARS of school IEP plans.

:greendollar: :greendollar: :greendollar: :greendollar: :greendollar: :greendollar: :greendollar:

Soon 05-26-2010 08:33 PM

The Funniest Kids Test Answers Of All Time (PHOTOS)

http://i.huffpost.com/gadgets/slides...?1274927446023

http://i.huffpost.com/gadgets/slides...?1274927481014

http://i.huffpost.com/gadgets/slides...?1274927496378

http://i.huffpost.com/gadgets/slides...?1274927571355

Kenna 05-27-2010 06:44 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sweet (Post 103914)
I was trying to set an appointment for a particular customer today...

in her really REALLY shrill voice (that I first thought was my boss playing a trick) she tells me - make that YELLS at me- that Tuesdays and Wednesdays wouldn't work for her because she's "over 90 years old and still goes golfing on Tuesday and Wednesday, but it is just too damn cold to go today... I'm 90 years old, I can't be out in this 40 degree weather, it's just too damn cold today!!!! But next Tuesday you bet I will be at the Country Club!!"

When I asked her what day would work for her other than Tuesday or Wednesday, she yelled in an ear piercing shrill voice "Honey, I TOLD you I was hard of hearing, are you too? I said Tuesday and Wednesdays wouldn't work for me! I just have to have someone clean those whirly gigs out of my gutters!! I can't have my grandson do it, he's worthless!! Can you come on another day OTHER than Tuesday or Wednesday? I might be 90 years old, but I still get out and golf EVERY week!!" by this time, I'm sitting at my desk with the phone in one hand OUT from my ear...and my forehead in my other hand wondering when she was gonna hush so I could approach this from a different angle. :phonegab: :doh: :doh:


What cracked me up even more....was when I told the entire, full story complete with animations and mimics of her shrill voice to Mom... watching Mom crack up so hard she had tears!! I had her reaching for the tissues and holding her ribs!!

"But I just got to get to the Country Club honey!! Come get those whirly giggs out of my gutters! I can't stand whirly giggs! Hey honey, have you ever gone golfing before? I tell ya, it's good for the blood and old knees!"

OMG!! I better NOT find out that was the boss playing a trick!!

I wish all customers were this fun!!
So, I had to call this little, sweet old lady back today and tell her that my boss would be a little late... she said "that's okay, I'm over 90 years old but I'm still here and my gutters are still here! He can visit anytime, I'm not going anywhere."

She just tickled me silly!! I adore her spirit!! LOL

diamondrose 05-27-2010 07:49 AM

Reading some of the posts in the caption avatar thread

Queerasfck 05-27-2010 09:10 AM

We loved this! I was cracking up over it this morning. So great.

Kenna 05-28-2010 09:26 AM

He knew it! :pointing: :cheesy:

GoofyLuvr 05-28-2010 09:45 AM

I received a check in the mail the other day. I had been expecting it, but it was much larger than I thought it would be. I was just about doing back flips, I was so excited! So, my friend and I went to try to get it cashed. After many tries, I found out the only way to get it cashed was with a hold placed on the funds. My good mood suddenly went south. I had PLANS for that money!!! My friend looked at me, and said "Now, I know all the red has been licked off your candy, but it will be ok."
I looked at her for a second, digesting what she had just said, then busted out laughing. How could I stay bummed after a comment like that?

Blade 05-28-2010 10:33 AM

THAT DAMN SNAKE IS BACK, he thinks he actually lives here. Maybe I should put him a mailbox up outside.

Ms. Tabitha 05-28-2010 10:44 AM

Conversation over morning coffee .. there is never a dull moment!

:love1:

Kätzchen 05-28-2010 12:39 PM

Not much has "cracked me up" today :shocking:

but my day began just a bit ago, so there's no telling what I will find funny today or what will cause me to laugh or giggle!

:blueheels:

Pretty Woman 05-28-2010 01:28 PM

Nothing! So far I've had a super stressful, client crazy-making, chaotic day. Maybe that will change.

GoofyLuvr 05-29-2010 04:45 PM

I received an email today, made me laugh, thought I'd share. It's titled "Life Thoughts By Ducky"
 
:duck: 1) I saw a woman wearing a sweatshirt with "GUESS" on it. So I asked "Implants?". She hit me.

:duck: 2) Marriage changes passion. Suddenly you're in bed with a relative.

:duck: 3) How come we choose from just 2 people to run for President and over 50 for Miss America?

:duck: 4) Now that food has replaced sex in my life I can't even get into my own pants.

:duck: 5) I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose fitting clothing. If I HAD any loose fitting clothing, I wouldn't have signed up for the class in the first place!

:duck: 6) When I was young, we used to go skinny dipping. Now we just chunky dunk.

:duck: 7) Don't argue with an idiot. People watching may not be able to tell the difference.

:duck: 8) Wouldn't it be nice if, whenever we messed up in our lives, we could just hit "Control, Alt, Delete" and start all over again?

:duck: 9) Wouldn't you know it.... brain cells come and brain cells go, but fat cells live forever.

Gemme 05-29-2010 04:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GoofyLuvr (Post 116092)
I received a check in the mail the other day. I had been expecting it, but it was much larger than I thought it would be. I was just about doing back flips, I was so excited! So, my friend and I went to try to get it cashed. After many tries, I found out the only way to get it cashed was with a hold placed on the funds. My good mood suddenly went south. I had PLANS for that money!!! My friend looked at me, and said "Now, I know all the red has been licked off your candy, but it will be ok."
I looked at her for a second, digesting what she had just said, then busted out laughing. How could I stay bummed after a comment like that?

After all, we ALL know red is the best flavor! :blink:

Blade 05-31-2010 11:00 AM

2 days ago I put a little box in the cage with a small towel in it for Itty Bitty to sleep in. He shit in it and slept on the floor of the cage. So I took it out and put litter in it.:|

Today I put a box of litter in the cage with Grumpy and he is shitting in the floor of the cage and sleeping in the litter.:wtf:

ROFLMSAO!!!:rofl:

MrSunshine 06-02-2010 03:14 PM

I can't stop watching this.
 

Random 06-12-2010 03:40 PM

A conversation..


Mitmo: What cha doing?

Me: Preaching my normal spill in a thread..

Mitmo: What thread?

Me: :| hahahahahahahahahah Let me go look...

Shoot.. I was totally off thread topic..

So what's new?

Soon 06-13-2010 06:16 PM

confirmed heterosexual anti gay voting GOP Congressman Schock at the Whitehouse Picnic
 
http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_1xQeOPE9eP..._schocking.jpg


(on the right)

UofMfan 06-13-2010 06:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by HowSoonIsNow (Post 129547)

Ha! too funny!

waxnrope 06-13-2010 06:21 PM

just loooove the turquoise belt! :rofl:

Kenna 06-18-2010 04:53 AM

Doggy Bubble Baths at 6:15am...with two silly muttlies who gladly rolled over in the tub to have their bellies scrubbed and rinsed. As if to say "ya missed a spot, Mom!"

Mitmo01 06-18-2010 05:43 AM

The fact that i dont need an alarm clock when i have 4 felines busting into our room to wake me up right on time to feed them...who knew that kitties work better than the alarm clock lol

Mitmo01 06-18-2010 06:03 AM

I forgot to add one of my coworkers had the funniest t-shirt on yesterday....it said " I have a blackbelt in crazy" lmfao and there was a 70's karate dude on it and it was the funniest shirt ive seen in a long time lololol

Soon 06-22-2010 12:12 PM

I'm So Much Cooler Online
 

Scota_Parisi 06-22-2010 04:09 PM

This has been cracking me up for a few days..... amazing kid!! Makes all of us Rock Band geeks look like amateurs, that is for sure!



Blade 06-23-2010 04:27 PM

An email from a friend, oh my goodness I'm still chuckling....

Scorp 06-28-2010 08:39 PM

Next Time Your Door Bell Rings...
 
http://30.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_l3...nkvno1_500.jpg

Toofrufru 06-29-2010 09:10 AM

Rerun
 
I was due for an appointment with the gynecologist
later in the week.
Early one morning, I received a call from the doctor's
office to tell me that I had been rescheduled for that morning at 9:30 am. I
had only just packed everyone off to work and school, and it was already
around 8:45 AM...
The trip to his office took about 35 minutes, so I didn't have any time
to spare. As most women do, I like to take a little
extra effort over hygiene when making such visits, but this time I
wasn't going to be able to make the full effort.

So, I rushed upstairs, threw off my pajamas, wet the
washcloth that was sitting next to the sink, and gave myself a quick wash
in that area to make sure I was at least presentable. I threw
the washcloth in the clothes basket, donned some clothes, hopped in the car and raced to my appointment.

I was in the waiting room for only a few minutes when I was called in.
Knowing the procedure, as I'm sure you do, I undressed, hopped up on the
table, looked over at the other side of the room and pretended that I
was in Paris or some other place a million miles away.

I was a little surprised when the doctor said, 'My, we have made an
extra effort this morning, haven't we?'I didn't respond. After the appointment, I heaved a sigh of relief and went home. The rest of the day was normal - some shopping, cleaning, cooking.

After school when my 6 year old daughter was playing, she called out
from the bathroom, 'Mommy, where's my washcloth?' I told her to get another one from the cupboard.

She replied, 'No, I need the one that was here by the sink, it had all my glitter and sparkles saved inside it.'

Never going back to that doctor. Ever.

Soon 07-01-2010 03:24 PM

This Line:
 
...."He's so deep in the closet he's finding Christmas presents."


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 05:51 PM.

ButchFemmePlanet.com
All information copyright of BFP 2018