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It has been three weeks since you left this earth...
My heart still aches like it was today... I miss your silliness Mocha... Who knew such a little dog could have such a huge impact in only 8 years... |
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The memorial service of someone very close and dear to me is planned for tomorrow. Some part of me doesn't want to go - as if not going means she isn't gone, or that I don't have to finally cross over that bridge of acceptance - even though I know she is gone, whether there is a memorial service to attend or not. The day of her death I cried all day off and on, at the hospital, and after leaving there. These last few days I've shed a few tears. Tomorrow I know I'm going to fall apart, and I don't want to. It's as if tomorrow marks reality, and I don't want to go there.
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My sunshine shadow Miss Maddie has the flu. And she is just a sad little lump on the sofa, covered up with a blanket. My sister said she isn't even talking, she just lays there with a sad little look on her face . Awww.
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Having to leave my partner's house and come home.
Snow. Grocery store lines. |
:( :(
My roommate's big german sheppard is down. He's flipped his stomach. I should have known something was wrong when he didn't bark his big dog bark when we got home last night. His big brown eyes are telling us it's time. Big dog gentle giant, you're breaking my heart. |
I miss my Momma D really bad...24+ beautiful loving years with the best Momma anyone could ask for somehow doesn't take away the loneliness of the past year without her.What an amazing woman.
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sad....talking with my mom today.
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friendships should be easy ~ not taken for granted ~ treasure a friend, they will always be there ~ until pushed away ~
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My 40th Birthday is tomorrow ... this should be celebrated with family, at some point. Anyone that knows me knows I am incredibly close w/my Dad. I am sad because there are issues going on that may make it to where I do not get to celebrate with him. I never in my life thought anything would ever come between us. The hard part is the issue is not him, it's the bitch he is married to. Sometimes you have to step back till things are realized and issues are recognized and acknowledge. My heart is sad and I will continue :praying: for a resolution for us all. Sorry to spew, but this is my sad for today and for about a week now. |
Sitting outside in the sun for the second time today on my break... I was sad to have to leave it and go back inside... it is quite beautiful today.
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Thanks so much Jar!!! I'm hoping for the best. I know we'll get through this. |
My son had a huge meltdown at the therapist today... tried to hide under the chairs and in a cabnet, banged the chair against a wall, then started throwing things, he tried to run out of the office and when I blocked him he started kicking me repeatedly... its the worst meltdown we have had in a really really long time... and it has made me SO sad.
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Severely missing my friends and family, and then just finding out that one of my old mentors died. I'm at a loss for words
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OUCH
A Huge step ladder fell on my car ... scratched it all up ...This is what made me sad today .
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an acquaintance of 20+ years was admitted to the hospital on thursday...she was given 4-6 months to live...pancreatic cancer...long story short she is an alcoholic and the symptoms were missed completely...my daughter is taking it very hard as she was very close to the eldest and middle child of this acquaintance...i pray for peace for her 3 children and peace for her...i am trying not to think about 6 months from now :(
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It's been on my mind a lot lately ...especially in the evenings and at bed time when I'm really hurting...
I'm not asking for pitty... I'm just looking to vent ... recently my health/mobility issues have gotten much worse...to the point where I fear within a year or less, I will be walker/wheelchair bound...this is an awful dark mental space it's sending me to. I don't know how to process this fear or how to cope. What happened to the strength I once prided myself about? |
my daughter let me ex into the garage to get some yard tools...as she was gathering things, she told my daughter that one of the cats got outside and was attacked...the vet shaved her belly and she was cut up from head to toe...the vet stitched her up and sent her home hoping for the best...she chewed her stitches and the vet had to sew her up again, then it got infected...that little cat is a survivor because she is fine now :)
this is the second time something close to her was almost taken away... |
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