Some of the things on my mind......
 

Why do so many medications have to fuck with your brain? Ugh nerve meds are basically meds that mess with your central nervous system. Like anticonvulsants and tricyclic antidepressants. Well im now on both. Not depressed and no I don’t have seizures but this is what neuropathic pain meds are. Man they have some dopey feeling side effects and sleepy. With time shit should settle down but now.... yeah now it sucks. Plus it’ll take a while before they work fully. Have to start low and taper up. I still think I feel improvement but today was a rough day so apparently not as much as I thought. Patience.....
Today my phone acted up so I turned it off and was going to restart it. Well I dunno what happened. I woke up 3 hours later to a phone I never restarted lol. I blame the meds.

Also the damn snow put a damper on things...my back woods road here was still bad today so I stayed home. I have a lot to do tomorrow. Get my daughters birthday gift and my second iron infusion. Call the dr who’s call I missed while I was sleeping with the phone off. And work on some packing and errands.

Alot of meds are used for many different things. Only your doctor can make sure you're on the correct meds and dosage.

You are correct. I research the hell out of every med I take lol. I do agree with the meds being given for the neurorathic pain. My research tells me I am on the right meds. They are just going to be tough to get used to. But I’ll be happy once I do and I feel better so In the end I’m sure It will be worth it as long as the diagnosis is correct. I do feel optimistic about it. :)

**must be hard for some!

Is it the 31st yet?

I wish! :wine:

:byebye:

all of my own course finals have been safely tucked in and are awaiting grading, for the most part......straight A's. However, Friday....I have my finals for my students, and I am nervous for them. I have taught them as well as I can :hamactor:

Also, donuts or bagels? hmmm :blink: ok.... both it is.

The upcoming holiday.

My plans with the ex and her kiddos

My friends Christmas tomorrow

Family Christmas on 2 different days

I recently found this girl on the dating site I'm on, and I've kind of been putting off messaging her... for multiple reasons. I do really want to talk to her, but I'm afraid of f*cking up any chance I have with her. All the other people I've messaged previously I've never got a response back. I really don't want to f*ck this up, but I also don't want to miss any opportunities here.

Amazon Prime Delivery
 

So, I placed an order for 3 tubes of matte lipstick at Amazon. I have prime, but Amazon says it will take a week to deliver. That’s okay because sometimes they don’t have things in stock. I get it.

The lipsticks arrived a week or so later in a box labeled by Walmart. I looked at my order on Amazon to confirm I ordered from them (I knew I had, but I checked anyway). Then I went to Walmart.com and saw that they had the lipsticks in stock, could deliver in 2 days, and was cheaper! Amazon ordered from Walmart and had them deliver directly to me. I tried to leave a review about this experience at Amazon, but of course they wouldn’t approve it.

I now check at Walmart after I look at an item on Amazon ... and it’s paid off. Just got an old-school gaming system for my grand nephew at Walmart. Walmart delivered it yesterday (free shipping during the holidays) and Amazon will deliver after Christmas (after they get it from Walmart, I’m sure).

Along with that, Amazon’s delivery has been lousy this year. They’ve developed their own delivery system in my city and are not using USPS and UPS as much. Amazon isn’t nearly as good nor efficient as USPS and UPS. Their drivers are rude and refuse to abide by our company’s policy of delievering everything to the warehouse and not to employees’ desks. Or, they’ll just dump packages outside at any door where anyone can come along and take them.

I’m gonna keep prime because it’s worthwhile for me, but it’s not as good as it used to be.

:poc-cool:

That's true, all the other people I've sent a message to, I've never heard anything back from, and it kind of kills me a little. Sometimes I wish the femmes would message first... and the thing with online dating is you don't get any signals or anything like eye contact or flirtation from the other person. Anyway, wish me luck.

This weekend!

My best friend in high school and after. You know the one you do everything with? Then after that it was sort of on and off friends that just ended up fading into separate directions. Well for the last 3 years she searched for me. I sort of ignored it because it had been so long since we had talked. And then about 9 months ago I caved and talked to her for a few hours on the phone. We caught up on each other’s lives and she really loved reminiscing about the old days. Then I sort of got quiet again and yesterday found out she died a week ago. Well I feel like shit. I’m very sad about this.
So I decided to look at her Facebook page. The first of December she posted “make it a December to remember”.
Well fuck!
That was not the way, Hope! :(
Love you, damnit

Dude, I’m sorry. That really sucks. I hope you have some people you can talk to about this. If not, I’m sure you can confide in anyone here. If you ever need someone to talk to or just listen, you can always message me.

I’m sorry, man.

Well, it's sent. 1) I hope I get a reply, and 2) I hope I don't f*ck any potential meet-up's up.

On my mind
 

A young lady.

I have seen her across a crowded room. She rarely smiles but when I walk up to her and flash my smile she always smiles back. She has a meek gentle smile. Her eyes are green and when she smiles at me my heart feels warm. Last night she invited me to ask her out. I am so happy to have the opportunity to get to know the lady behind that smile.

That I finally wrapped up my ex and her kiddos Christmas presents, so I won't have to rush around tomorrow.

Getting through the holidays without drama.

in 13 days we will be celebrating a very big day!!!

:married:

Thinking of going to Folly Beach for my birthday.

....or Cedar Island to watch the wild horses.

I'm starting a fire and I read the headline on the newspaper and I thought it said, "New Uses For Old People", I was thinking WHAT? I read it again and it said POOL not PEOPLE.

Hoping I can keep my hands to myself! I just wanna umm nevermind!!!

LOL

Food
 

Food for the new year is on my mind...

I always start the new year with black-eyed peas (for good luck) and greens (for mo’ money).

Sometimes I’ll add chit’lin’s to the menu, but not this year. I don’t clean them well (have been told I clean them too much—as if a chit’lin can be too clean) and I waited too late to have some shipped. So, I’m skipping the chits this year.

Instead I’ll add fried green tomatoes, but can only find heirloom green tomatoes and don’t know much about them. Heirlooms can ripen without changing colors. Even though these are firm, they could still be ripe, sweet, and green. Whatever the case, that’s what is on the menu.

Fried green tomatoes, black-eyed peas, and collards. Should be good and most certainly could be worse.

:poc-cool:

About 2019, and what it has in store for me. I hope I make some new friends.

in about 72 hours, I will marry my best friend. :rrose:

Congrats!!!

Happy new year, all!!

I was a good boy but she was a bad girl!!!!

...
decluttering by tossing out some Christmas decorations we haven't put up in years!

If it doesn't get done while we're putting away this year's decorations, it'll be another whole year...:|

We’re doing the same thing this year, well, not with decorations, but just with stuff in general. We got rid of SO many boxes of stuff so far.

I really want to take a long hot bath but I'm unable to do so!

How much I am looking forward to this coming weekend. :reader:

~
 

huh ! that's why I never had a diary ? I thought it wasn't fashionable ~ :|

That not everything in Life is meant to be easy. Sometimes the struggle makes you come to understand that you should never take anything for granted. I realized today that I am at peace with the struggles I have had (and any that may come in the future) because there is nothing nor no one that I take for granted. It makes Me feel that My Life is that much richer in a non-monetary way which is the greatest richness of all.