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-   -   Dykes And Lesbians To Watch Out For (http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1443)

Heart 05-27-2010 05:49 AM

feel compelled to say
 
As a femme, I do not consider the word dyke to be exclusively butch. I am also a dyke. The brashness, toughness, in-your-faceness, whateverness of dyke is as much femme as it is butch.

Also want to say that dyke/lesbian are not outdated terms IMO, and do not only have to be associated with the 1970s.

Heart

Lynn 05-27-2010 06:02 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Heart (Post 115255)
As a femme, I do not consider the word dyke to be exclusively butch. I am also a dyke. The brashness, toughness, in-your-faceness, whateverness of dyke is as much femme as it is butch.

Also want to say that dyke/lesbian are not outdated terms IMO, and do not only have to be associated with the 1970s.

Heart

The wrapping is feminine lesbian, the creamy middle is dyke. Love women--period, but especially those butch women. But, they're all beautiful to me.

In my first lesbian incarnation, I came out to Cris, Holly, Ferron, Meg, Alix.... After 20 years of marriage to a man, I came out again. It was like being Rip Van Winkle. Women's Music had such a role in defining who I was, I was disappointed (if amazed) that I couldn't find a distinct women's music community that wasn't mainstream.

I love being a lesbian and I love being a dyke. I consider my best qualities to come from these identities.

Kobi 05-27-2010 06:29 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lynn (Post 115259)
The wrapping is feminine lesbian, the creamy middle is dyke.

That certainly perked up my mornin cup of coffee.

;)

ravfem 05-27-2010 06:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Heart (Post 115255)
As a femme, I do not consider the word dyke to be exclusively butch. I am also a dyke. The brashness, toughness, in-your-faceness, whateverness of dyke is as much femme as it is butch.

Also want to say that dyke/lesbian are not outdated terms IMO, and do not only have to be associated with the 1970s.

Heart

Hi Heart :)

i completely understand and applaud that you consider yourself a Dyke! :cheer:

Coming on to bf websites has shown me that many non-butch people also claim that label, and i think that's amazing!

i was stating what the word Dyke brings to mind for me, and i love reading what different people conjure from it too.

:byebye:

Heart 05-27-2010 06:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lynn (Post 115259)
The wrapping is feminine lesbian, the creamy middle is dyke. Love women--period, but especially those butch women. But, they're all beautiful to me.

In my first lesbian incarnation, I came out to Cris, Holly, Ferron, Meg, Alix.... After 20 years of marriage to a man, I came out again. It was like being Rip Van Winkle. Women's Music had such a role in defining who I was, I was disappointed (if amazed) that I couldn't find a distinct women's music community that wasn't mainstream.

I love being a lesbian and I love being a dyke. I consider my best qualities to come from these identities.


So cool Lyn! I too first came out in my 20s, was married to a man in my 30s, and came out again in my 40s. Now I'm in my 50s, and rooted in my queer lesbian femme dyke identity. :LGBTQFlag:

BullDog 05-27-2010 08:31 AM

Good morning dykes, lesbians and friends! I am lovin this space and reading everyone's words.

cinderella 05-27-2010 09:41 AM

So, just out of curiosity...would you call someone a dyke if she were a girly-girl, 'high-femme'?

I'm from the old school, and in my day the word 'dyke' was used for women who, from their attire and aggressive demeanor usually attributed to males, were thought of as 'butch', but more commonly called 'dyke'. The word, usually uttered by straights, was meant to be derisive and offensive - that is why I don't like the word. However, these days I'm seeing that the 'd' word is being applied to all or most lesbians no matter how they i.d.

Comments anyone?

BullDog 05-27-2010 09:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cinderella (Post 115333)
So, just out of curiosity...would you call someone a dyke if she were a girly-girl, 'high-femme'?

I'm from the old school, and in my day the word 'dyke' was used for women who, from their attire and aggressive demeanor usually attributed to males, were thought of as 'butch', but more commonly called 'dyke'. The word, usually uttered by straights, was meant to be derisive and offensive - that is why I don't like the word. However, these days I'm seeing that the 'd' word is being applied to all or most lesbians no matter how they i.d.

Comments anyone?

What you say is interesting Cinderella. It does seem when it is used derisively it's almost like "wanna-be man get out."

To me Dyke- in the reclaimed sense of the word- is about attitude and not appearance. Femmes certainly can have that strut too. I know of all types of women both on the more feminine and masculine side of the spectrum and in between who claim dyke.

The_Lady_Snow 05-27-2010 09:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cinderella (Post 115333)
So, just out of curiosity...would you call someone a dyke if she were a girly-girl, 'high-femme'?

I'm from the old school, and in my day the word 'dyke' was used for women who, from their attire and aggressive demeanor usually attributed to males, were thought of as 'butch', but more commonly called 'dyke'. The word, usually uttered by straights, was meant to be derisive and offensive - that is why I don't like the word. However, these days I'm seeing that the 'd' word is being applied to all or most lesbians no matter how they i.d.

Comments anyone?

I use dyke and have used dyke and have no shame using dyke.. I am pretty girly, not over the top but I have my good days. I am proud leather dyke for many a year matter of fact I was Sir's baby dyke for a good 4 of those years aggresiveness and all :)

cinderella 05-27-2010 09:57 AM

Hmmmm, that's interesting as well, Bulldog. And certainly, folks can call themselves whatever they like...I just don't like the word, and never will - I'm set in my ways like that - and, lordy, I sure hope no one calls me 'dyke', lol.

Quote:

Originally Posted by BullDog (Post 115339)
*snip*
I know of all types of women both on the more feminine and masculine side of the spectrum and in between who claim dyke.


BullDog 05-27-2010 10:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cinderella (Post 115346)
Hmmmm, that's interesting as well, Bulldog. And certainly, folks can call themselves whatever they like...I just don't like the word, and never will - I'm set in my ways like that - and, lordy, I sure hope no one calls me 'dyke', lol.

LOL, no worries Cinderella, we won't. :) Welcome to the thread!

cinderella 05-27-2010 10:36 AM

Thank you ever so... :)

Quote:

Originally Posted by BullDog (Post 115352)
LOL, no worries Cinderella, we won't. :) Welcome to the thread!


JustBeingMe 05-27-2010 12:10 PM

Awe shucks, anyone old enough to remember the womyn's movement on Washington, and the Lesbians/Dykes using the Lavender Bandanas to seperate themselves outward? Hee hee hee, I flagged them when I came out with a HUGE BANG!! I"d still hang one in my back pocket!!

Lynn 05-27-2010 01:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cinderella (Post 115333)
So, just out of curiosity...would you call someone a dyke if she were a girly-girl, 'high-femme'?

I'm from the old school, and in my day the word 'dyke' was used for women who, from their attire and aggressive demeanor usually attributed to males, were thought of as 'butch', but more commonly called 'dyke'. The word, usually uttered by straights, was meant to be derisive and offensive - that is why I don't like the word. However, these days I'm seeing that the 'd' word is being applied to all or most lesbians no matter how they i.d.

Comments anyone?

To me, "dyke" connotes an attitude and way of being, not a particular look. I am really girly. It's just me, not something I cultivate. My partner insists I am "a femme," and she can think what she likes. ;) That's not really how I see myself. I'm told that I would look girly in a burlap sack, so it can't be the way I look that makes me a dyke.

Heart 05-27-2010 01:43 PM

See, I don't necessarily equate femme/feminine with girly-girl, ergo no problem using the word dyke for those who are femme/feminine. But I do get the way "dyke" was used against more visible lesbians, namely butches. One reason I like the term dyke is it makes me more visible. And I like being visible.

Kobi 05-27-2010 02:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cinderella (Post 115333)
So, just out of curiosity...would you call someone a dyke if she were a girly-girl, 'high-femme'?

I'm from the old school, and in my day the word 'dyke' was used for women who, from their attire and aggressive demeanor usually attributed to males, were thought of as 'butch', but more commonly called 'dyke'. The word, usually uttered by straights, was meant to be derisive and offensive - that is why I don't like the word. However, these days I'm seeing that the 'd' word is being applied to all or most lesbians no matter how they i.d.

Comments anyone?

Welcome cinderella!

I am old school as well and remember the term dyke as being an insult from straight people as well.

These days, for me, using the term dyke to describe myself is a pride thing - an acknowledgment of the struggles of the past, a celebration of our history, and a reminder of how much we have overcome. A solidarity thing perhaps.

I try not to use terms for anyone these days...partly cuz I dont know what the terms even are anymore. Since Toyota recalled my gaydar, I cant even distinguish the lesbians from the non lesbians....tho Im pretty sure if I think someone is, they arent.

Anyway welcome and I promise not to call you by the d word. :)


Kobi 05-27-2010 02:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JustBeingMe (Post 115449)
Awe shucks, anyone old enough to remember the womyn's movement on Washington, and the Lesbians/Dykes using the Lavender Bandanas to seperate themselves outward? Hee hee hee, I flagged them when I came out with a HUGE BANG!! I"d still hang one in my back pocket!!

I am old enough to remember this but I truly dont. That was a good idea idea tho, subdued visability.

I dont think I ever did anything like that to show my true colors....so to speak. LOL. I did go thru a purple shoelace stage tho....

Kobi 05-27-2010 02:41 PM

Thoughts anyone?
 
I am going to throw this out there cuz it has been on my mind lately.

I came out in the rights movement age and when lesbian rights/visibility was a monumental thing. Having been out of the loop for a while.....I still see gay pride marches going on, and I see the political organizations for rights i.e. for the entire alternative lifestyle umbrella community.

Is there anything specific going on, or organizations for, or groups geared just to lesbians? Or has this become an outdated concept?


BullDog 05-28-2010 02:33 PM

TGIF is the understatement of the week! Have a great weekend all.

Kobi 05-28-2010 04:08 PM

In case ya'll didnt notice there is now a Lesbian Zone. I presume Linus can move this over if we like. Or change the name. Or whatever is anyones preferences.

Lotsa people traveling this weekend. Be safe out there.



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