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I am working my 12 steps of AA and doing my inventory and you know, I have discovered a whole bunch of stuff about me.
Including how I define love. as well as how I have settled for what wasnt love and how I justified it in my head. I put down in an earlier post that I need attention to feel loved. Thats correct. I do. Its the number one thing I must have from someone in order to feel loved. It doesnt have to be alot. It doesnt have to be lavish. But it has to be ENOUGH. And if I have to spell out to them what enough is, then I dont feel loved. Period. Its simply not the right relationship for me. |
basically i only need respect...
it seems like a small thing... but... all those other little things can be present... all the right moves... looks... words... but... realizing that respect is not there blows it all away... |
fruit snacks and granola
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To spend one on one time with my beautiful, smart, sassy, bright, funny nieces.
To get lots of hugs and cuddles with them... to watch them play their sports; or dance around the house in their froggy pjs and slide around the kitchen in their fuzzy socks; to giggle at them as they bounce around their rooms telling me about their crushes; to have the youngest curl up on my lap when she asks me to read to her; to get tickled when the oldest asks to brush and braid my hair; to watch how silly they are on the trampoline; to hear them once again yell out "Aunt, You're THE BOMB!!"; to share "ooooo's and ahhhh's" as we all huddle around the computer to flip through the National Geographic website and to have them tell me of places they dream to visit; to inspire them when they tell me what they want to be when they grow up.... to be there for them when they need me. To be a part of their life as much as possible. To give them the HUGE Love and Attention back that they lavish on me. To see them happy and to watch them grow into beautiful, well accomplished, confident, well loved young ladies. |
love at this point in my life means cut the crap and own me, tell me "You belong to me and don't fucking forget it",
unless of course, you are my mother :| |
Quote:
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All I need is a few simple things:
1) Accept Me as I am, flaws and all 2) Talk to Me, don't go and air out our problems to someone else ~ if its something with us please just talk to Me 3) Don't tell Me you want Me and then get so caught up that you suddenly realize your not ready to give yourself ~ once My heart is invested, I don't want to find out you've gone too fast 4) Be honest and up front with Me, especially if you expect it in return 5) Don't try and change Me, it wont work There's more but its simply really ~ just love Me, thats all I ask |
Love, sometimes overrated, but everyone needs it or so I've been told
I think at this point in my life as long as I'm accepted for good, bad or ugly, I know you understand me enough and I'll truly feel loved Feeling content and secure in self and relationship also screams loved Top of my list though has to be communication, without it, love is lost |
Security; knowing I'm safe and respected a Partner that doesn't expect me to be the sole care-taker, provider and cook in the kitchen (I'm so tired of doing it all myself for the past 30+ years) Support and Compassion Hugs and quality time with my nieces tender kisses on my forehead at the end of the day Someone (friends, family, lover, et al.) to share dreams and life with, and not someone that sucks the life out of me or kills my dreams and cuts my connections with family & friends like my ex of many many years ago did. family dinners where we can share our day's events and quality time together Space of my own when the time is needed; without having to defend why I need space Shared Space where their presence is very comforting and reassuring. the sense of Familiarity and Protection |
Willingness to engage when things are shakey. What is uncomfortable must be resolved.
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Understanding...no matter how hard the circumstance...
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safe haven
understanding tight grip acceptance allowing me to love back. |
I need you to always, have my back, for I will always have yours
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good two way conversation
fire in the fireplace cup of coco shared puffy blanket that smells like lavendaer fabric softner |
I need your time
I need touch I need understanding I need patience I need loyalty I need intimacy I need faithfulness I need honesty I need trust I need communication. I need to be able to talk to someone about anything and everything. I need to feel that they"get me" I need passion filled love making nights I need affection without me asking for it... I love lots and lots of hugs, kisses, hand holding... Sharing my dreams, goals and my past Accept me for me. Dont try and change me... I need to feel that I am someone's priority.. And that "us" is priority to someone |
"someone to watch over me"
a cup of kindness. when i've rested in your arms, i will give back."
i will elaborate on this later. |
A four carat Canary Diamond.
I am a simple girl - with simple needs! |
I feel loved. I need honesty, loyalty and security.
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I'm simpler than IF. Three carats is good for me. And you can save the canary. I don't like yellow.
:blink: |
Quote:
When I was in Australia - Dreamer and I went into an Opal store in Melbourne - OMFG This was the most brilliant Boulder Opal I have ever seen (as if I have seen a lot) and it was surrounded by tiny diamonds - the gold had a black rhodium finish - so it was neither yellow or white but black. The Opal was free form - simply stunning and a work of art. I wanted this! I did not get this! I might feel loved if I did. And it was less than a canary diamond. |
FOOD! At least for now
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Theres only one way I know how to say. I want you.
Laughter. Laughter until our tummys hurt and we can't breathe. (Oh, and someone that can make fun of me.) |
Quote:
*cry* http://www.paulgallienne.com/page19.htm I love the black and boulder opals on this page. |
Receiving books and chocolate is a good start!
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Quote:
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What I need to be loved is very simple - tell Me and show Me
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My Friends
My Family Oh and a gf would be the bonus. |
To just be able to snuggle up and talk about the day. No matter how good or bad it was...
Sharing hopes and dreams.. |
Hmmmm...What I need to feel loved...
~ Ask me how my day went...and actually listen and care about the response ~ Tons of affection filled with snuggles, hugs, and kisses ~ Eyes meeting even in a crowded room, lingering glance ~ Sweet Gestures or thoughts ~ Tell me you want me or how much you missed me ~ A nice text or a surprise phone call ~ Being able to laugh and just be silly together ~ Being there to comfort me and listen when the world just doesn't make sense...knowing that I will do the same ~Sharing in the laziness of a rainy day that calls for take out, snuggles, and movies ~ Being able to share in those intimate moments behind closed doors...The type that only you and your partner know about...delicious, sinful, and loving all wrapped in one :) :) Too specific, I'm sure..But hey I am a girl who knows what she wants :) |
My wife
that's all. |
submission
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To feel loved, I need to be accepted as I am, without a need for me to change in order to meet anyone else's expectations. I need to be able to ask for and get hugs and support. I will feel loved if I am loved according to my own needs and desires, and not those defined by another. I feel loved when I am listened to and HEARD, and when I am CONSIDERED. When we do something just because I want to do it, and when she is happy because *I* am happy, I feel loved. And, when you tell me how you need to be loved and then let me love you that way, I also feel loved. xxoo
I do feel loved. |
I need to know that we are BOTH vulnerable and ready to BE loved.
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To feel loved I need:
Your soft caress on my arm that asks, "how was your day?"
Letting me show my affection for you makes me feel loved When you look in to my eyes and tell me how pretty they are To know that you accept me for me, w/o reservations Shared kisses that speak volumes in moments of complete silence To know you feel the same way |
Hmm what do I need to feel loved
For someone to love me unconditionally, and allow me to be vulnerable and dependent in their arms yet recognize my strength and abilities as a individual.
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what do I need to feel loved??? a lot lol!!!
-food (lol! no one would like me if i'm hungry) -on call (lol! should always be available) -good listener (i am a nagger, lol! i am so quiet with other people, and i only talk to my butch, unfortunately, i could be annoying) -has a good memory (should never forget important occasions) -should bring out the best in me (i need to feel beautiful and wanted without saying it, lol!) |
I need to know that no matter what life throws at me I have a partner who stands by my side through it.
Affection and lots of it Make me feel like I'm your King cause I will only treat you as my Queen So much more but I need to get back to work :) |
For me, what is important in love is to take the time to find out what love feels like to my partner and then make sure I know how to love them in that way and vice versa. This is important because what feels like love to me may not feel like love to another person, and their way of showing love may not reach me in that capacity.
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Physical attention,
Plenty of kissing, Caresses,subtle touches. Cuddles. Hair ruffles, Candlelit baths, Intimate massages, Nice meals cooked, |
what do i need to feel loved........
Just the knowing that I am.......
even if we are miles apart :stillheart: |
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