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-   -   Male ID butch vs. FTM?? (http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1736)

SelfMadeMan 08-14-2010 04:14 PM

Not pissed at all - never was :)

DapperButch 08-14-2010 04:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Corkey (Post 174798)
Here it is. Male ID'd Butch....for ME. Not transitioning, male, butch. Butch is male as much as it is female. I am not female I am male. I will retain Butch. I am Transgendered.
I have to ask if anyone has bothered to read any other the Brothers here who are Male ID'd Butches, or if they come to the table with preconceived notions of how others should be? Not necessarily you HB.

Quote:

Originally Posted by honeybarbara (Post 174810)
oh I'm not asking for justification! Not my bed. lol.

Corkey... I know you are trying and I actually really appreciate your effort but I'm afraid I'm still slightly confused. I respect your tie to the word and your proud use of it, that I can hear in your tone. Basically, you are what used to be called TG Butch in my Old Use Dictionary. Fair enough. That use of butch I understand. So far from what I've read from others TG Butch = Male ID'd Butch. No rug ripped out from under me yet.

I'm feeling archaic and I'm not even 45...

Thanks for helping me out, I know it's not your job.

Not so fast, HB! <chuckle>

I am a TG Butch....meaning not male nor female in sex. And Butch is my gender (gender = woman, man, Butch, etc). I think that many TG Butches use this definition.

I separate out the terms transgendered from transsexed.

DapperButch 08-14-2010 04:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RavynTuqiri (Post 174806)
So then....what do you all think of a third gender? If a third gender
exists, then the rules of each specific gender do not inherently apply
nor do the rules of switching from one gender to the other.

If:

Sex = male, female, intersexed

Gender = man, woman, Butch, etc.

Did you mean third sex?

(Side note: Many see butch as inherently third gendered.).

AtLast 08-14-2010 04:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DapperButch (Post 174829)
Not so fast, HB! <chuckle>

I am a TG Butch....meaning not male nor female in sex. And Butch is my gender (gender = woman, man, Butch, etc). I think that many TG Butches use this definition.

I separate out the terms transgendered from transsexed.

Hey, Dapper-

I think this is really important. However, I am not either, but have had conversations with folks that are very clear about these distinctions for themselves. I can't speak to this, really, but, I do have a personal concern about not wanting mis-information to be floating around about these distinctions. This could be (without even meaning it to be) dismissive to our transsexed members. This is just a complex set of variables and does have bio-physiological and medical parameters to understand.

Anyway, glad to see this distinction clarified. Maybe someone with knowledge about this will offer information so that the distinction does not get lost in assumptions. This can get very sensitive.

imperfect_cupcake 08-14-2010 04:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DapperButch (Post 174829)
Not so fast, HB! <chuckle>

I am a TG Butch....meaning not male nor female in sex. And Butch is my gender (gender = woman, man, Butch, etc). I think that many TG Butches use this definition.

I separate out the terms transgendered from transsexed.

yes and more popular use of that term. And in that, seperating transgender from transsexed. which my brain really thanks you for. that's the one I "come of age" with.

Corkey's use still slightly confuses me as I'm not quite certain of the underlaying premise of his terms, but I don't really need to completely understand. it's sort of close enough and it's not really all that important - Corkey is still completely Corkey, regardless of if I can follow it with my own upbringing of terms or not.

my mind is probably geared to non-specifics better. maybe I'm just a generalist, blurry person. I get along better with really gappingly wide terms.
It's why, ever though I'm fairly gender fluid I can't be arsed with defining it (too muuuuch wooork. lazy.) and just go with generalist "femme" with no qualifiers. I also don't care if I'm called she or sie.

I do actually really appreciate the effort people are taking to help me understand though!! jesus. that's actually pretty damn nice. So thank you, Dapper x

Corkey 08-14-2010 04:44 PM

For me
Transgender = who I am
Transexual = how I fuck

My sex isn't my gender and my gender isn't my sex.
And I just went and confused a whole lot of folks.

RavynTuqiri 08-14-2010 04:44 PM

A third gender in which the "rules" attempting to be applied
by the two main stream genders do not apply and by which
members who identify alternatively can apply their own rules,
definitions, and labels as they see fit.

The only requirement of the third gender is the understanding that
the third gender is grey and is up to each individual to color their own
palette as they see fit...while keeping open to marvel at the beauty
of the other portraits being painted around you.

DapperButch 08-14-2010 04:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by HowSoonIsNow (Post 174822)


Deviant,

I'm not sure if you saw posts 19 and 20, but there are two members who explained the retention of their ID as butch after transition.

Self Made Man,

You stated that if someone doesn't intend to transition, they shouldn't be on hormones and, yet, the HBSOC allows for people who have no intention of having surgery or real life experience to be on hormones.

I was just wondering your thoughts on that considering you are pro-HBSOC and, yet, their guidelines seem to contradict your position.

Personally, I think Harry Benjamin has its place but I don't think that it should be stringently applied to all without exceptions.




Right. The only expectation for hormones and chest reconstruction is one letter from a therapist saying you have a gender identity disorder and meet "readiness criteria"

For genital surgery you must live full time for one year as the opposite sex and you need two letters for sugery.

The standards of care actually specifically state:

Can Hormones Be Given To Those Who Do Not Want Surgery or a Real-life Experience? :
Yes, but after diagnosis and psychotherapy with a qualified mental health professional following
minimal standards listed above. Hormone therapy can provide significant comfort to gender
patients who do not wish to cross live or undergo surgery, or who are unable to do so. In some
patients, hormone therapy alone may provide sufficient symptomatic relief to obviate the need
for cross living or surgery.

imperfect_cupcake 08-14-2010 04:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Corkey (Post 174842)
For me
Transgender = who I am
Transexual = how I fuck

My sex isn't my gender and my gender isn't my sex.
And I just went and confused a whole lot of folks.

LOL!!!!

ok that helps.

transgender = who you are, totally understand.

transexual = how you fuck. I think I get. you mean in hetero - meaning fucking opposite sex to how you see your own body?

sorry corkey it's getting personal and feel free to tell me to fuck off and mind me own biz!

EnderD_503 08-14-2010 04:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DapperButch (Post 174829)
Not so fast, HB! <chuckle>

I am a TG Butch....meaning not male nor female in sex. And Butch is my gender (gender = woman, man, Butch, etc). I think that many TG Butches use this definition.

I separate out the terms transgendered from transsexed.

Haha, and so we come full circle :p Every label is different for everyone. There is no widespread or clear cut definition that applies to how everyone applies their own identity.

And so to the question the OP initially asked, we're back to the beginning. What is the difference between a male id'd butch and an FtM? Well, what's the difference between one FtM and another. Not every FtM sees themselves the same way or views the label FtM the same way. We've even had some guys who have "transitioned" here in this very thread who claim they don't see themselves as male despite the fact that they've "transitioned" (sorry for the quotations, I just dislike that word) physically and even changed their gender legally. Same way that not every male id'd butch understands that identity the same way. Some of us identify as 100% male, others feel differently. Or male but not in the same way someone born biologically male might consider themselves male (which is a whole other kettle of fish, since we shouldn't assume that every single biologically born male understands themselves in the same way as though they're all carbon copies of one another.). Some of us plan on transitioning/are transitioning/have transitioned while others have no such plan to do so while still considering themselves male. Some of us like the colour blue, others like yellow. Some of us hate brussel sprouts, others devour them like they're god's gift to humanity.

My point: sure we all have commonalities and dissimilarities. I may have more in common with someone who identifies as FtM than with someone who identifies as male id'd butch (talking about experiences, identity etc. here), or I may have more in common with another male id'd butch than with another FtM. There might not actually be a huge difference or any difference at all beyond terminology depending on the individual. Or the terminology and being male might be all we have in common. Or not. Often in order for discussions to occur there needs to be agreement on a common vocabulary...the problem is that having a common vocabulary with identical meanings doesn't really work when talking about how people understand themselves or identify themselves to others.

Corkey 08-14-2010 04:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by honeybarbara (Post 174850)
LOL!!!!

ok that helps.

transgender = who you are, totally understand.

transexual = how you fuck. I think I get. you mean in hetero - meaning fucking opposite sex to how you see your own body?

sorry corkey it's getting personal and feel free to tell me to fuck off and mind me own biz!

bing bing bing we have a winner!!!! Precisely.

BullDog 08-14-2010 05:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by EnderD_503 (Post 174851)
Often in order for discussions to occur there needs to be agreement on a common vocabulary...the problem is that having a common vocabulary with identical meanings doesn't really work when talking about how people understand themselves or identify themselves to others.

Yes this is quite difficult when people have their own personal meanings for things. You don't associate stone butch with woman or lesbian, yet I am a stone butch, woman and lesbian. I know many other stone butches who are also women and lesbians.

Dapper says many consider butch to be inherently transgender. I am not at all transgender and I am a butch. I think to call me transgender would be inaccurate and would not help people to understand what transgender means for those who really are. Yet I am most definitely butch.

Corkey 08-14-2010 05:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BullDog (Post 174860)
Yes this is quite difficult when people have their own personal meanings for things. You don't associate stone butch with woman or lesbian, yet I am a stone butch, woman and lesbian. I know many other stone butches who are also women and lesbians.

Dapper says many consider butch to be inherently transgender. I am not at all transgender and I am a butch. I think to call me transgender would be inaccurate and would not help people to understand what transgender means for those who really are. Yet I am most definitely butch.

And you don't consider yourself male ID'd. And that is fine with me, just another color in the spectrum.

BullDog 08-14-2010 05:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Corkey (Post 174861)
And you don't consider yourself male ID'd. And that is fine with me, just another color in the spectrum.

Yes, agreed Corkey.

Corkey 08-14-2010 05:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BullDog (Post 174865)
Yes, agreed Corkey.

Just as Butch has a spectrum, so does Transgender, those who are on it will have their own identity and definition of who They are. Isn't diversity fun.

imperfect_cupcake 08-14-2010 05:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Corkey (Post 174852)
bing bing bing we have a winner!!!! Precisely.


woohoo! I get the giant stuffed panda!!!


Quote:

We've even had some guys who have "transitioned" here in this very thread who claim they don't see themselves as male despite the fact that they've "transitioned" (sorry for the quotations, I just dislike that word) physically and even changed their gender legally.
see that, I'm more familiar with. The term I was told by a few I know/knew was FtQ/M
"transitioning" to their own queerly defined sex/gender (just matching things up better). I personally like the word if it's used in a ritual sense rather than a medical sense as I've known people to "make transitions" to very different stages of their life to celebrate achievements or what not. And running the gauntlet (transition) to their desired "state." that doesn't even sound quite right either. nevermind.

They use FtM as messy imprecise short hand. I'm not saying everyone does, but the individuals I'm thinking of did.

I'm by no means not trying to say I know much, I'm only trying to... ah... contextualise my knowledge/ignorance divide so people know where I'm coming from. Reflexivity ;)

I'm learning. Thanks for the patience :rrose: to everyone so far in allowing me to participate in this space.

DapperButch 08-14-2010 05:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AtLastHome (Post 174838)
Hey, Dapper-

I think this is really important. However, I am not either, but have had conversations with folks that are very clear about these distinctions for themselves. I can't speak to this, really, but, I do have a personal concern about not wanting mis-information to be floating around about these distinctions. This could be (without even meaning it to be) dismissive to our transsexed members. This is just a complex set of variables and does have bio-physiological and medical parameters to understand.

Anyway, glad to see this distinction clarified. Maybe someone with knowledge about this will offer information so that the distinction does not get lost in assumptions. This can get very sensitive.

Yes, personally, for me, if I was transsexual (meaning FTM), I would never use the term transgender. It would throw things off.

I have seen the word transgendered used in quite a few ways:

1) an umbrella term for FTMs, genderqueers, crossdressers (of the non-trans persuasion), etc. I am pretty certain this was the first usage of the term

2) For people who tend to see themselves as between sexes - male/female

3) other ways


I'm #2 and think that there are enough of us around to shift things this way! lol

The only problem with the term (which I talked about in another thread on another site), is that it has the word gender in it when really in definition #2 we are talking about a person's sex. So, really we need another term (and no, genderqueer is not the same thing to me...and again, there is that pesky gender word again when really referring to a person's sex!)

Anyway, my initial point was going to be that I think that if I was transsexed that it would bother me if the word transgendered was used when describing me. They are NOT the same thing and I would feel misunderstood/misrepresented, I think.

Just my two cents of rambling for ya...

imperfect_cupcake 08-14-2010 05:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Corkey (Post 174869)
Just as Butch has a spectrum, so does Transgender, those who are on it will have their own identity and definition of who They are. Isn't diversity fun.

rotflmao after the nerf bat bonking is over...

DapperButch 08-14-2010 05:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BullDog (Post 174860)
Yes this is quite difficult when people have their own personal meanings for things. You don't associate stone butch with woman or lesbian, yet I am a stone butch, woman and lesbian. I know many other stone butches who are also women and lesbians.

Dapper says many consider butch to be inherently transgender. I am not at all transgender and I am a butch. I think to call me transgender would be inaccurate and would not help people to understand what transgender means for those who really are. Yet I am most definitely butch.


No, no, no. I said inherently THIRD gendered. Very different! And many do view butches this way, just like there are many who don't.

BullDog 08-14-2010 05:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DapperButch (Post 174878)
No, no, no. I said inherently THIRD gendered. Very different! And many do view butches this way, just like there are many who don't.

Well I am not third gendered either. It would be inaccurate to describe me as third gender and to say all butches are third gendered would not be any more true than saying all are transgendered.


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