realize
 

twice now I have confused
listening thread
with whats on your mind thread.

I apologize for that and for not having the knowledge to correct that error.

http://globalresearch.ca/monsanto-ro...-water/5339244

http://truth-out.org/opinion/item/17843-banknado

http://ajw.asahi.com/article/0311dis...AJ201307090059

Lust at first sight.

.......

I have a few things on my mind that I am trying to sort through.

My job. I need to apply to more places and get out on some interviews so I can get away from the unnecessary stress my current one causes me. I need to get away from working night shift asap.

My health. It's actually pretty good with one exception. I have some choices to make that are a little tough. I've discussed the choices with one person so far but could use another person to discuss them with... I'm just not sure who...

My ex fiance. I'm not sure why all of a sudden she is being all caring about me and my health. She's offering to be there for me and help out in ways that inconvenience her. That is not like her at all. At least it wasn't when we were together. She knows we will never get back together and she doesn't want to (neither do I) and she knows my heart belongs to another.... even if that person doesn't want it...

Her. I'm trying to not feel the way I do but I can't seem to stop. I don't know if I should try and pursue her or walk away. For now I'm not doing anything. I'm a strong believer in not competing for someone, but I want to compete for her. Normally I just let the person see who I am and if they want me they can choose me. This time I want to prove to her that she should give me a chance. I could blame it on the pain meds, but I felt this way before I was on them... Ugh. What's a boy to do! LOL

Damn I miss my computer . Hope it can be saved .

My sister texting me from the living room!!

Work seems to be sorting itself out a little bit but I am still job hunting. (15 applications in this week so far.)

A couple of you know I was hauled in for a disciplinary meeting recently regarding my bad attitude from an incident that happened almost 2 months ago. Saturday I called in sick to work. I was to be written up for both offenses, which leaves me with one more write up until I am fired. (We're allowed 3 in a 12 month time period.)

Tonight when I started my shift my manager asks to speak with me. I was prepared. This would be the write up for not working Saturday. Turns out he wanted to tell me that he is not writing me up for not coming in to work and he decided to not write me up for the disciplinary action.... so my record remains clean with no write ups....

He also told me they are willing to do whatever I need in regards to my current medical issue, including donating a few weeks of PTO if I need it for surgery. Apparently some coworkers had found out and want to donate their unused PTO to me. One of them is willing to donate a week's worth...

As far as my medical is concerned... I'm feeling much better and have an appointment with a specialist later this week. The specialist has some alternatives to surgery to discuss with me. I'm curious and hopeful. Surgery is not an option I really want to take. Anyone who knows me well knows I am terrified of having surgery again (and why) and that I won't even go see a doctor for any reason unless I have to.

This lady talks a lot. Shes cool but I can't focus.

Thinking about just how much it hurts to hear the words I don't need you no matter the reason

It's been a rough night at work. Not really anything I'm not used to or can't handle so I'm not complaining about that. The only thing that threw me off is the newbie...

Those who know me know I am very open and it's hard to offend me or make me feel uncomfortable. The newbie decided she had to tell me a story about herself tonight. A very sexual story with very graphic details... at the same time she also felt the need to touch me while telling me this. It wasn't a sexual touch, but with how graphic she was getting it did not make me feel good. This is not the first time she has done this to me.

So now I have to decide if I need to take her to HR about this. She is 5 days away from being done with her probationary period and this might get her fired. She already is on the verge of losing her job due to performance and attitude issues. But I have to work with her three to four days out of every week and I am her direct superior for the majority of those days. If I don't report her I will have to continue dealing with it. I tried talking to her in the past about this but it only got worse.

I think I may need to relax with a drink or two at the bbq tonight... and maybe head out to the club afterwards...

http://cdn.polarisindustries.com/pol.../1900-1910.jpg

http://cdn.polaris.com/ind/2014/img/...l/topimage.png

http://sweepstakes.history.com/own-the-road/entry