No that is not what is being said at all from what I gather from *any* of the femme's who have voiced their opinions on this and experiences.

Thank you

I can NOT be the only one on the interwebz who has witnessed a Femme and a male Id'd Butch fall in love. Glitter and unicorns ensue. THEN they break up.
Inevitably, the Femme will come to a thread and switch to using female pronouns and birth names in an attempt to emasculate said Butch.

THAT makes me crazy and is a thousand time worse than being lazy or making a simple mistake.

I'm not the only one? Am I?

I ask this honestly, not snotty, cause you could prolly whip me around quite a bit...:cheesy:

Is it only femmes? Or do "we" (the collective we) just notice it more and remember it more?

I've seen it from both sides of the fence.

Woof right??

*I* was coming from my POV and what I have seen more of.

Make sense?

I've seen that.

I've also seen butches use female pronouns/emasculating phrases when referring to their ex's male-identified partner.

This felt incredibly dismissive and silencing.

I merely posted what *my* opinion was on the post I quoted.

If your experience/opinion is different, I am sure it could have been stated without the implied tone.

Right? I've seen that too.

It can seem that way. Butches and transmen do not get the same amount of backlash that femmes do for misconstruing (intentionally or not) pronouns.

So. Moving away from the he/hy she/shy proper pronoun debate...

Do any Femmes here use a pronoun other than she/shy? I'm combing my dendrites to think if I have run into this and cannot come up with anyone.

Remember though, I have a memory like the girl in 50 First Dates. So just cuz I can't think of any doesn't mean they aren't out there.

I wouldn't mind "zie" if it ever took off enough for me to get used to it. I wouldn't mind "he" if it wasn't said with malicious intent.

I know someone that uses

hir

Dunno if that is the same as what you are asking though:|

I wonder what are the ways that Femme's feel umm...femmasculated?
Like how does it look when someone takes a swipe at your femininity?
Because I don't think it looks the same as emasculating.

I am sure the hell not gonna go first on this one:bicycle:

I will go first.
How about being told that you are "butch".
I have heard this in a jovial/joking manner in reference to my..uh...type A personality. As if being forceful, determined, or smart is somehow a butch trait.

I don't take it as a compliment. Same with somebody throwing around the word: Toppy or Topping when I am forceful, determined or smart.

I hope that this makes sense and doesn't feel like I am saying that *butch* is an insult in general. I'm not.

Maybe it doesn't look the same as emasculating, but it's just as hurtful.

I will gleefully scratch at the eyes of anybody who questions the femininity or femmeness of myself or my pretty lady friends. Particularly since that questioning is always (fucking always!) in response to us showing our strength, our brains, out independence.

Fuck That.

Right? You make me love you. I'll send you cash for that pizza m'kay?

She said it best

FUCK THAT...

Another thing I have heard..

All you need is a nice butch so you can settle down...

Um no I don't and I sure the fuck ain't gonna settle....

Yeah, settling is something that debris does.

How about the look of amazement when you put together an Ikea cabinet or use a power tool on something? Like it's a big huge deal...OR a look of horror if you announce you do not like shopping. Or shoes.