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sneaking in under the cover of Pacific Daylight TIme ;) |
i've experienced more attempts at perpetuating femme-hierarchy when getting to know less attractive and stupid butches.
my experience. me. only. and to be totally fair--i'm SURE that their attractiveness fell from possibly average to *no way* once they began to offer their unsolicited and absurd insights on high-femme (which i don't think exists and they were sure entailed a demure smile, heels and stockings 24/7), relationships (i'm not a so-called 'natural' submissive because they were ill equipped for someone such as myself), and i could go on... so, perhaps it's that i find intelligence *highly* sexy that i can't quite separate my disgust of the thoughts from the one doing the thinking--but i have found myself in these situations a few times and it's always presented to me in a way to try to knock me down to their size, like 'i'll fuck you but just so's you know...' trying so hard to mask their insecurity at sitting across from me: oh, you're very attractive, if a little young... and perhaps not what i normally go for (as fucking IF) and i will do you, though you clearly lack real *experience* so you'd better hold on to your seat, little miss--and normally, i date high femmes--oh what are those? those are femmes who wear nylons and high heels, i have an ex who wore heels every day.... (wistful pause) and skirts--you know those tight skirts? ...yes, that's it--pencil skirt.... (implying that my totally cute outfit isn't drag-enough for the pizza place/diner/hole in the wall) wait. where are you going?"see? not attractive + stupid = not getting any. |
on the other hand--
i ADORE doing the 'femme' stuff with another femme--i don't feel competitive, i feel supported and love to give support. i am grateful that i have a local friend who i met (through mack!), and we can discuss the real stuff as well as get absolutely stupid in 'bath and body' saying, 'oh HONEYYYY look at this new DOUCHE!!!' really loud. (really, poor tiger!) and about the butch that creates this femme-continuum/perpetuates the myth of high vs. low femme (can i be teenage slut femme??) --i've never felt so ERASED. and not accidentally, not the way society sees everything in M or f... more so an attempt to deliberately erase my *femme* entirely. |
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lolz
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In my mind, when someone says 'high femme', for some reason, i think of a glamorous woman from an old movie, from the 40's maybe, wearing satin and complicated hosiery, making smart and quippy conversation. Maybe with finger waves in her hair? It's a nice image. :) Sorry, I know this is a bit of a random musing on the topic...
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I've seen it way too many times, followed by nasty fights or break ups. Then saying it's true they are the same as me down there. It blows my mind and I lose it, my favorite i've heard a few times as of late is hy is a glitter cock. I despise that word, and it just skeeves me. If you view them as a female then why start anything when you know full well they are male id`ed and you won't respect them in their id. |
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Are you serious? People use glitter cock as a way of calling someone less than in some way? OMG. lol. Let me tell you, i have done some damage with those glitter cocks (hand held). ;) |
How come we can't have a discussion about Femmes without talking about Butches?
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i personally have not gotten much of that from butches. And even not a huge amt from femmes. i don't think it's as big of a deal for us -- the hierarchy. |
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http://leighsinger.files.wordpress.c...mme_fatale.jpg |
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A particular hand movement I used while fucking someone was *Butch* *Blink* gee I didn't know that being concerned about possibly riping someone while getting my hand into them was based on gender id.. silly femme, serious fucking is for butches.. (sarcasm intended) |
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ARGH! As I'm reading the thread I am thinking some butches are like this? I think I am really happy with my old nerd, not wrapped-up in butch posturing self! Some of this is just insane and I can't imagine thinking like this!
I'm also understanding more and more why I feel really interrogated sometimes on the first few dates. Makes sense. Total sense! |
I love to participate in cunnulingus, I do, I have heard from my peers this makes me not so femme..
I say the hell with that..:) oh and yes I said cunnulingus and no I have no gender preference when it comes down to it.. :bandana:<cleaning gear on in case |
When I think of High Femme, it involves Mary Jane and Cookies. :)
I don't even know ANY women who wear nylons and pencil skirts 24/7. Zero. It cracks me up when someone says they are looking for a Femme like that, cause that search is going to lead to dissapointing results! |
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:jester: :nerd: |
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How sadly self-punishing of someone not to try out something to see if they really like it, but to obey some internalized sexist rule. Boy, that's a case where our gender categories sure aren't liberating. What's next, femme purdah? |
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I think it hurts me the most when the shock & awe comes from other Femmes. I tend to keep quiet during gatherings when the convo turns to sexual stuff. Which is kind of sad. |
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