I've noticed that a lot of transmen feel a lot more understanding of men after transition, to the point of being sympathetic. Their libido's go up, they physically feel bigger, they start to realise what an aggressive world men live in, and they have to balance this new realisation with their understanding of the world they lived in before they became male.

What transmen lack, that perhaps Chaz forgot in his excitement, is the sense of entitlement that bio-boys are fed from birth. Women aren't supposed to enjoy sex, women are supposed to say no. Sex is the male arena. Even without the social pressures we expect, a female animal of any sort would take care who she slept with in case she became pregnant to the wrong male.

Hopefully when things have calmed down somewhat, Chaz will look back at some of the things he said in the public sphere (in fact he may have already done so), and acknowledge the many way he could have been misunderstood.

I'm really glad that everyone is talking about Chaz, it makes me happy.

That is something I have heard coming out of the mouths of a few transguys, as well as read on online forums. My bf is also less interested in chitchat and gossip now that he's transitioned, which makes me wonder if there really is something going on. Maybe the hormones do make boys less verbal, which in turn would make them less interested in non-essential talk. I'm guessing too that Chaz, being in his adolescent stage at the time the documentary was made, pretty much behaved like most adolescents do - Self-absorbed, blustery and impatient.

I am guilty of finding myself less interested in chit chat; however, that's not exclusive to chit chat from women.

My "becoming" occurred (socially) at a poker table in a truck stop.....almost always all-men-all-the-time. And lemme tell ya.....some of those guys could do a serious amount of gabbing about nothin' much. There were times I had that "nails on a chalkboard" reaction and had to take a little table break.

So, yeah, I find anything that is said along the lines of "women this" and "women that" to be sexist. There aren't a whole lot of qualities, gifts, annoying traits, etc... that belong solely to --insert gender ID here--.

That really bothered me too. I have to say that when I got on my full dose of T, my basic personality and the way I interact with people didn't change much. I am still me, still careful about how my words and deeds affect people, and I have made it a priority to not become self-absorbed into my transition. Whatever my friends and family are going through, I still try to be engaged in their lives and a source of support for them. I have always been sensitive to the feelings and needs of others, and that hasn't changed.

I was surprised and taken aback at how Chaz treated his girlfriend in the "kitchen" scene. And to say that when his girlfriend is upset she has to make everyone around her upset, well maybe Chaz needs to own his own feelings and not place her as responsible for them. That was my reaction when I watched the documentary.

However, since I have had some time to reflect, I have decided that I don't have enough context and exposure to their relationship to really understand what is going on with them. I am hesitant to pass judgment on someone else's relationship when I have so little exposure to it. The documentary gave us a glimpse, and I recognize that my initial feelings and thoughts about it all are based on a very limited amount of information.

As for some of his sexist comments about women and men in general, and his seeming assumption that being an asshole is just a male trait, those are things that irritate me because I know they aren't necessarily true. They aren't true for me! I keep thinking, and I don't want to be lumped into that stereotype. It is an ugly one and it doesn't have to be that way for men. My father is nothing like that. He is a kind and gentle soul who is very other-centered. I get these traits from him. I was raised by a father who isn't a sexist, self-absorbed pig. A lot of the assumptions that those are male traits ignores that fact that these are social constructs.

I am a woman and I have zero interest in "gabbing," chit chat or gossip. Actually I'm pretty quiet and not a big talker. (may come as a big surprise to some here ;) ) I know of plenty of men who just go on and on about nothing as well as women. In fact for me, one of the trademarks of men's entitlement is them talking on and on. Not all men do it and not all women engage in "chatter." It's sexist to characterize women's talk that way.

I think one of the things that the doc does poorly is maintain the idea that T is the cause of all the anger, frustration, "personality changes", etc. Personality stays the same but we tend to attribute it to T when in fact it was always there. We just ignored it or downplayed it.

Yeah and unfortunately Chaz is reinforcing these ideas in his interviews.

You are being very candid, June and I admire you for this- as much as my mother loved me and supported my being lesbian, she had a few "beats" to deal with and I think that is just plain human. The sexism displayed by Chaz is nothing new, unfortunately. No, it is the acceptance and rolling it into T effects that is nothing new. And I think this hurts Transmen and is an affront to them.

I get really tired of the T-blaming with this and feel that it is quite a negative view of transmen. Adolescent self-absorption does not justify sexist attitudes and behaviors- not for anyone. I certainly had many discussions with my son about this growing up. In fact, he came to me during adolescence and was the child of two alcoholics and a neglectful mother that due to her own abuse background, surrounded herself with abusive misogynists that my son viewed for many years as male role models. There was a lot to undo- it wasn't teen angst and puberty propagating sexism for him!

Also, grieving the loss of gender of a child, parent, sibling, friend, partner is an area of our whole response to transitioning that I think gets swept aside as the trans person's experiences become the main event. This bothers me a lot because we humans are "not islands." I know that even as trans supportive as I am, if my son transitioned, it would be difficult for me in some ways and I would grieve the loss of him as a male. Not very PC of me, I know, but truthful. Frankly, I would be concerned and scared about any possible health risks that could arise for him as well as just the usual fear of having someone you love undergo surgeries under anesthesia. I would deal with these things on my own and seek help for myself (not put my fears on him), but I know I would have these feelings. I also know that I would support him in every way possible.

Throughout the years with the (unfortunately) public trials of Chaz and his celebrity parents, I have felt there was a lot of self-absorption and immaturity. But, there are many Hollywood children that appear to be indulged, and end up doing some very self -destructive things (talking about drugs, alcohol, not transitioning). All ending up in the public eye- which in and of itself seems to add to the mess. For years, Chaz's weight struggles have been blasted all over the tube (he even was on the Biggest Loser), for example. Frankly, it seems like when he was female (to the outside world), these weight comments were common and worse- hummm… what does this say about weight issues and women as opposed to men? Now, his transitioning.

Part of me wonders just how much he really wanted such a public display of his life... yet, again. Or, did he just feel that no matter what he felt and wanted, there was no escape? So, he might as well let the cameras roll. There is just something in his defensive posturing (that was also part of Chastity that I remember) that always gives me pause. Something in his eyes that just felt/feels both angry and sad- even now that he has been able to transition. Maybe this will dissipate as he is able to live his life as who he always has been. I hope so.

I am happy that the trans community has found this documentary to be positive. But, I hope that Chaz finally just gets to have his own life. But, I don't see that happening and I think this is something Hollywood celebrity) kids pay a very high price for.- having a life.

I don’t know if other folks have done any searches online and run across some of the blogs, etc. by the general public about this documentary and Chaz- I have and it is upsetting. Very upsetting- most of them are in response not only to the documentary, but the appearances on shows like Piers Morgan and Joy Behar. The same old gender-ignorance in comments along with a lot of horrible comments about his obesity. Some really ugly things being said. Seeing this hurts and makes me wonder if there is any way to educate the general public about this at all. But, I have no idea how representative these are really. I would really like to see links that are to positive reactions from outside the LGBTIQ community. Please, post some if you have seen them. I can’t take any more of the kind I keep seeing. There is such a long way yet to go.

When I first started My T, and I'm not even on a full dose yet, I noticed that My sex drive went through the roof ~ its also not something I was used to so it threw Me off and at first I kinda pushed the increased sexual thoughts aside because I still was not used to wanting it that much (or even at all). I think now that I've gotten more used to the increase I'm celebrating more the fact that I even have a sex drive. I agree that just because you have a heightened sex drive does *NOT* mean you can sexually abuse/assault/rape anyone .......... even just to use that as an excuse is appaling and there is no reason for it. I know thats not what Chaz was saying, and I get where he was coming from but you do have to choose your words carefully no matter what gender you are

I kinda shook My head here too, cuz I thought why would you try and justify that stuff on the hormones when thats not it at all

On the morning news It said Chaz will be on Dr.Drew either tonight or tomorrow..Should be intresting to see what Dr.Drew comes up with.
One thing I noticesd on the Piers Morgan show was that there is some unease going on between Chaz and Jen,corse haveing been on so many
shows may be getting to be a bit much.After watching them as well as seeing the body language I wonder if they will be together in a year...I get she is a bit snippy about how she deals with all of this and chaz reminds me of a hormone driven teenager(from The T shots) I gess its normal or maybe a change on dosage will still do the job and chill him a bit.

I liked the point Jenn made that everyone is in transition when a friend, loved one, etc goes through a transition. I thought about my own "transition" on many levels as Rufus decided to and then went through his own transition. I am interested in knowing what types of transitions partners of trans men and women go through.

Melissa

I do think that many of Jenn's responses were inappropriate and there were a lot of cringe moments for me. On the other hand, she states she was drinking at this time so I think a lot of these comments and behaviors might be related to her drinking. I think we don't really have a good sense of who Jenn is because a lot of what she said and did was while under the influence. My first reaction was that I didn't like her. But by the end of the doc and the interview with Rosie I really did come to like her (like is such a vague word, but I don't know how to describe it). She said some things that resonated with me and made me think. She didn't come across as phony but as very real. But again this could be a product of good filmmakers and editors plus the drinking. But all in all I got a lot out of this documentary and I'm glad Jenn was included. This was a doc about Chaz's transition, but also his relationship, Jenn's responses, his mother's response and so on.

Melissa

Good points, Melissa--ones that I hadn't thought about (re: the drinking) and, toward the end, she didn't irritate me as much. That post was first impressions about a half hour or forty five minutes into the doc.

I am VERY glad she was included. Very.

I have this feeling her and Chaz are in for rough times. I wish them the best.

I totally agree. I really hate that he *went there* about chalking up temper tantrums to the T.

I believe our sense of character stays the same but testorone is a drug and hormone and it does have side effects. But how these manifest in each individual is different and irregardless of how they manifest it doesn't excuse a persons behavior.

I know if I take my shot and I haven't eaten or if I take it too late in the day I will have a similiar effect to drinking several pots of expresso. The couple times i had this reaction I laid low until it passed, took note and I don't take my shot on an empty stomach nor at night. I knew i was on the edge and knew to stay clear of people.

Otherwise it has had the opposite effect on me. I am way calmer and mellower then I ever was. I am far less emotional. This doesn't mean I still don't have them they just aren't as easily seen. I use to bawl when watching extreme makeover home edtion, I now may have a tear or two well up. I am still touched but how it manifests in me is different.

I use to have extreme hormonal mood swing and actually what I called the pms flue and all that is gone. When things happen that would have put me in a tizzy i'm not really anymore. Do I believe some it is due to personal growth? yes but some of it is due to the change in my hormones.

I didn't like the general stereotypes also. What is really hard is this is an account of Chaz's transition and not a documentary on transition in general. So I do see where this is his experience. What is hard is the fact that it does reinforce common misconceptions. Also that most people won't say "oh this is just his experience" They will lump it into a one size fits all.

I guess I don't know what the complete role of a producer is but I would think that the producer would get a say in what goes in and what doesn't go in. On his facebook "Becoming Chaz" page he is listed as the producer. You are correct in that he isn't listed as an editor but wouldn't a producer still have a fair amount of say?

My BUTCH partner has never been interested in chit-chat--So you're saying there was a time, pre-transition when your BF liked the sewing circle? *just curious.