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I am not saying we shouldn't call out "isms" I just think another thread can be started to address that directly. We have a whole site for that. Why not use it. :) All opinions are of value in my eyes. I have nothing against anyone here and I'm not here to argue. I would just like to see this area maintain it's purpose which is writing and poetry. Cheers, Scoobs |
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Are you making an attempt to censor the feelings of others, when it comes to the prose/poem that was posted? When in fact, this poem can be searched and various renditions of it can be found. I sure hope not scubadyke... That would be a clear act of censorship and not productive or indicative of any writing thread. Julie |
This is the femme thread.
Sometimes, topics start out in one place and wind up in another, depending on the thoughts, feelings and insights of those that it speaks to. Obviously, the original post spoke to many of us and generated a lot of feelings. I personally have no concerns about where it wound up-writing thread or not. I would rather not censor anyone. I think everyone has a valid viewpoint-even when I do not agree with them. I am not a moderator and this is my perspective and my opinion. |
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I may not always agree but I will always appreciate. Scoobs |
Here is my stereotypical list of what ALL Femmes need to know lol :-D All in fun!
Hugs! Always get the gel top coat so your nails don't chip after a Manicure. Worth the extra money! Cheap mascara doesn't always do the trick... Go for the more expensive! If you are going to wear nothing else, wear eyeliner. You eyes will pop, girl! The blister Bandaids are a lifesaver for a night out dancing when you are wearing non- dancing shoes. If you lose a toenail cause you were out dancing all night in non-dancing shoes without the bandaid (tsk tsk) the nail ladies can hook you up with an acrylic and no one will ever know.. :) Brown and black are opposites on the color wheel... If you don't have enough time to get your nails done, Press-Ons do the trick and no one will know! ( this was hard for me, but they looked good!!) haha. Spanx are awesome! Lace stockings are sexy with anything! Black heels are also sexy with lace stockings, all the time!! Especially with a little black dress! You betta werk!! |
If I was the op
my lesson in this would be to be more careful. Especially with the >every< word. This person created a thread when they just meant to post? Had it been one post in the swoon thread it would not have gotten this kind of response. Saying all of the post's in here are a waste of time to read is probably not something I would have said but this is where AGAIN we all get to be different. I dont think people were dissing romantic gestures or thoughts at all. This particular (not original) poem? is not every femme's ideal romance and that's ok. To me, it really is that simple. |
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This is not to say that we shouldn't look for love and compassion and acceptance in a partner. Who we choose to have in our lives reflects how we feel about ourselves. I just think it's a myth that we can only be happy and feel loved when we have a partner who loves us. Don't wait for someone to come along and make you happy. Be happy with yourself here and now! |
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And yes, this is just my own personal thought upon reading this post. |
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People of my heritage are often stereotyped into movies and *just in fun* makes fun of us. They think it's ok because it's "just in fun". It's not funny to us. The fact that you capitalized the word ALL , added a *lol* then a *just in fun* sounds to me like you knew you were about to piss off a bunch of people. Nothing on your list applies to this femme, just so you know. |
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As one who is also new to this site, I can easily understand why JistMe felt somewhat attacked. I think that I would have felt that way too. This thread should have been a safe place to share well intended, simple and sweet words.
I do think however that this created a very valuable and worthy discussion (thank you JistME) that should continue elsewhere without the OP's intentions being the center of the discussion. I truly feel as if I have gotten quite a bit out of it and I would like to see it continue. As someone who is finding her voice and her place on this site, I do have to say that I am a bit disappointed and somewhat intimidated by the very occasional rude comment I see made, not against JistMe, but towards others that are simply sharing their point of view or even just asking for clarification. I'm not talking about the humor, such as JAGG's lovely list of "DO NOT DO'S". I think that throwing in that bit of humor is awesome, appreciated and a necessary means to keep any conversation or debate lively. I'm talking about the personal attacks. Respect and honor each person's opinions and if you so vehemently disagree that you can't be at least kind, step away and go find something else to do. It's those kinds of attitudes that cause drama and dissuade others from wanting to get involved in these discussions and oftentimes cause them to miss out on the value of being a part of such a wonderful and diverse community. |
Good grief. People are allowed to post their opinion, we don't have to agree with it, but running away is passive aggressive and if you didn't think about what you posted just say so. OY!
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like causing a 10 car pile up and keep going.
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Totally from *me* space again...
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And I am also sorry, but I am the kind of femme who would literally go insane if the most important worry in my life was the "right" hair, makeup, and nails. Therefore, it's not very "fun" for me to be stereotyped in jest. |
I think we should be careful about the your filters versus my filters and who has responsibility issue.
And I say that for one reason. All the sexual harassment classes I've ever gone to. The guy says sweetheart. He means nothing by it. But if the woman interprets it as harassment - then it is. If she's ok with it - then it's not. It has nothing to do with his intention, and 100% with the way it is received. And that is a very polarized example - and yes it could be argued rather easily that it's wrong and completely different. So I'll pull up another point - dealing with difficult people in the work place. If someone has a problem with you and you're pulled to DEO - you better not say "it's his/her fault because of their filters, I didn't intend..." or "this is just the way I am, if he/she doesn't like it they are the problem..." It won't get you anywhere and may even see you lose your job. Now we're in a casual laid back atmosphere here - but I have to say, maybe due to corporate / legal brainwashing, that anytime someone says 'it's your fault if you hear me wrong' - it makes me want to grab my documentation and get ready to head to a mediator. Just a thought... edited to add: oh shit I just realized this long thread is because of the way something was received instead of intended. kinda makes you go hmmmm |
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