Stone Butches
 

ok i been searching for a stone butch thread.......
and trying to explain to someone i recently met ..... about Stone Butch energy... and its hard for me to explain it.. lol
i just know I adore them .. lol ...
could use some views from others ....... ty :)

ok stone butch here except i think i have moved on into the transgendered... i am a little messed up on this one.. i am stone.. i identfy as male.. i have been on T in the past.. i feel male inside (always have)
and look male outside but beings i havent gone threw top or any t/g surg i prefer to be called stone butch but closley relate to t/g... hmmm now what?

Hi, Cody. Stone Butch here.

I tend to define Stone as connected to one's style of sexuality - bedroom behaviors and a distinct sexual energy. It sounds like here you are connecting it with how masculine/hard a butch is? I have heard that definition as well, but not in a long time. Am I reading you correctly?

Since I define it as connected to sexual practices, I think that someone can be transgendered or transsexed and stone butch as well.

Personally I am a TG Stone Butch. Not male (transsexed), but transgendered.

Hope this helps/makes sense.

I am a stone butch. I am not male. Stone butch means different things to different people. For me it is about sexual energy and desire. It has nothing to do with maleness for me. My masculinity also has nothing to do with male. How masculine or hard butch someone is also has nothing to do with male.

I am a masculine female (what butch is to me), woman and lesbian as well as being a stone butch.

yes this make alot of sense.. and i am stone.. i have always thought of t/g to be a person who is taking T and planing on having the t/g surg. as for me i stoped the T it made me meaner then a snake and as far as the surg.. i would consider top surg and think if i did the top surg i might not be "as" stone. even with out the T i still shave my face daily but i only have uneven patches.. i truly believe i was born male with some of the wrong parts.. so much so that friends have told me i dont need T. so i guess the question would be : to be considered t/g do you need to be in the process of making changes to your body.. other then working out for build an strenght?

I pretty much agree with Dapper and Bulldog about stone butch being related to sexuality/sexual practices (also I agree with what Dapper said about being both tg/ts and stone butch). That's the way I see it as well.

@cody, taking T or having top surgery or any surgery doesn't necessarily determine how a person identifies. You don't just automatically become transgender once you've been on T/had surgery. There are some who've had all of the above who id as a number of things, some don't even include the word transgender. Others might have had one and not the other done and id as trans, third gender, male, butch, whatever. There are others still who aren't on T, haven't had any surgeries who still id as any of the above. It's not necessarily dependant on what you've had done, but how you see yourself. That's my two cents, anyway.

I'm pretty sure there are also plenty of TG butches who are not stone butches. So the two may be connected, but not always.

A TG butch and/or male might enjoy penetration, for example, whereas a stone butch who considers herself a woman may not. That's just an example. It doesn't make anyone less or more male/female, woman/man, TG, third gender, etc.

kind of weird that im just now going threw this at 52.. guess im used to the old days when things were not so openly talked about.. i am stone butch male ID'd do not like to be touched sexualy.. have explored my male side and although small i hate my boobs but love my teenie weenie... but dont touch it!

Nods...

There are several different ways stone can be taken..

The two that I hear most about are:


Only gives... does not enjoy having certain parts of the body touched in a sexual way...

Only recieves.... does not enjoy touching certain parts of the body in a sexual way..

Right, I agree with this line of thinking; being stone has nothing to do with one's gender or one's sex.

Could be either. That is something that only you can answer, I'm afraid.

For me, being Stone has never been about feeling a need to protect myself.

I just find all the pleasure I need in pleasing the other. That is where I glean my pleasure. Mental orgasm.

P.S. I think it is really healthy that you are questioning which it is, rather than just assuming that all of a sudden you have become stone. A lot of folks would do just that, so that they wouldn't have to deal with it. I respect that and I think it is pretty cool that you are willing to put that out here. :goodluck:

Stone here. Have been for as long as I can remember. For me it is in the mind as well. Really don't like my junk touched. .02

Its interesting that you should write that there is an energy that is particular to Stones- of course I have heard of those who prefer to partner with Stones but I had always considered that a preference for a certain type of dynamic but had never contemplated that there was a “Stone energy”. Elsewhere in an attempt to clarify what is meant by a “feminizing touch” in the context of a Stone I wrote… self fulfillment comes from being externally focused, by that I do not refer to my external self- but to my sexual partner. Being inside her both physically and mentally is where I find my “on” switch.

The musician reaches that other place when hy brings the instrument alive- together each is able to experience their potential- realize what they were made for. I was not made to have another take me in hand; I was made to be with someone who does not simply allow, but wants, needs to surrender. And in that surrender she allows me to be who I truly am.

While some will equate Stone to simply having personal limits, for me it is far more encompassing- Stone isn’t about sex with restrictions, it is about everything- it is how we perceive the world, but more importantly it is about how we relate, understand, communicate, and connect to another.

A Stone Butch is a Stone Butch- regardless if they are partnered- but without the one who “gets it”, they are not a musician, simply a person who knows how to play a musical instrument.

EXCELLENT POST!!!!!!! SO RIGHT ON!!!! :hangloose:

Yeah, sort of. Of course I get your drift, but I'm always a little uncomfortable when anyone defines me by who I date. I'm a stonefemme because of my own personal boundaries. I'm not defined by those I date. I've known femmes who are far from stone, but find themselves dating stone butches. I'm a stonefemme who has dated butches who are not stone, (insert sad face here).

good morning too all the roling stones!!! or the kinda kinda not.. who knows

:bunchflowers:their is just something so fantatically melting about stones - i am pure putty in hys hands - the older i get the more hardwired i am for stoners - (i love the bike) :byebye:

nice heels!

thanks

i am trying to put up pics but i get message file os tp big - are you going to be around?

hat was for you ew are you going o be arounf:wine:

i will go to chat

We define ourselves my friend. Keep an open mind and find your own comfort zone. It will all work out exactly the way it should.

Yeh..I agree. Be whatever makes you feel happy and what works for you. I like what you said about being Stone with the Tantric thing going on.

I've kept from chiming in because I'm not butch...and I'm only semi stone... grin... soft stone if you would have it...

But...

A lover once told me that it was about feeling safe... and trust...

He said... The more I trust, the safer I feel, the more clothes come off...

He said... for a woman to get into his boxers, meant that that he trusted and he felt safe exposing the part of him that didn't match his inside view... (He was/is GID)

If he was feeling emotionally unsafe or the trust wasn't there, then the boxers and the a-line were NOT coming off..

If you've had a bad break up recently, an emotional trama that left you feeling unsafe to share yourself...

Something to think about....

I think there are so many reasons for someone being stone...

Energy exchange
Personal Satisfaction
Personal Programning
Protection

Human Sexuality is complicated and so very interesting..

Myself...

The more emotionally compromised I am, the more dominate I am... It's not safe to let anyone in close enough to share myself... So I turn it and make it all about them...

The more dominant I am, the less I want to be touched... I'm not even aware of my body and it's physically distasteful to be touched... It's the mindgasm, the taking my partner to where they only dream of going that blows me away... Touching me actually shuts me down and turns me off.. It's all about them, because it's safer for me that way...

The girl is me is crippled.. driven to the point of insanity...wounded almost beyond repair... Almost is the key word... Slowly... oh so slowly... (with the help of an incredibly patent and stubborn butch) I'm doing the work that will allow her to come to dinner and stay for a while...

Sorry.. Got on a tangent there...

What I'm trying to say is..

Only you know why you are the way you are..

There is not a damn thing wrong with being stone... With deriving pleasure from pleasing your partner... (and I have to say... Tantric? hell yes.. please and thank you...) if you are built that way... (personally, I think it's hot as hell to have someone orgasm from fucking me..)or if you choose to be stone...

But if you are questioning, if it's on your mind... Then maybe it might be something else...

Only you can know.....

As a stone butch I don't see having sex as being pre-defined or there being any less individual variation as to how I would relate to a partner. I don't think having sex with a stone butch is going to be any more or less predictable than having sex with someone who isn't stone butch and there's plenty of room for experimentation, spontaneity and playing off each other's vibes and energy exchange. That's not to say that every person is going to want to have sex with or partner with a stone butch. It's not for everyone.

I do agree with Converse that I don't equate being a Stone Butch with having sex with restrictions. It is much more encompassing than that. For me, it is quite freeing not restricting.

However, I don't think there is one, all encompassing Stone energy or that Stones can just nod at each other and know what one another is talking about- that's something I have seen discussed a number of times in the past, and I don't think that is the case. I think Stone Butch does mean different things to different people. I certainly don't relate at all when people start talking about feminizing touch or relating stone to being male. There are different types of Stone Butch and different personal meanings for it.