Stone Butches
ok i been searching for a stone butch thread.......
and trying to explain to someone i recently met ..... about Stone Butch energy... and its hard for me to explain it.. lol i just know I adore them .. lol ... could use some views from others ....... ty :) |
Thanks for starting this thread, I was wondering why there wasn't something for Stones
I was trying to explain to a friend a week ago or so what a Stone Butch was and equally what a Stone Femme was. After explaining, she realized that she's a Stone Femme!! I adore Stone Butches, they totally get my get my pulse racing and my heart racing. There's nothing like an Old Fashioned Stone Butch...now if I could only fine a Single one lol |
ok stone butch here except i think i have moved on into the transgendered... i am a little messed up on this one.. i am stone.. i identfy as male.. i have been on T in the past.. i feel male inside (always have)
and look male outside but beings i havent gone threw top or any t/g surg i prefer to be called stone butch but closley relate to t/g... hmmm now what? |
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I tend to define Stone as connected to one's style of sexuality - bedroom behaviors and a distinct sexual energy. It sounds like here you are connecting it with how masculine/hard a butch is? I have heard that definition as well, but not in a long time. Am I reading you correctly? Since I define it as connected to sexual practices, I think that someone can be transgendered or transsexed and stone butch as well. Personally I am a TG Stone Butch. Not male (transsexed), but transgendered. Hope this helps/makes sense. |
I am a stone butch. I am not male. Stone butch means different things to different people. For me it is about sexual energy and desire. It has nothing to do with maleness for me. My masculinity also has nothing to do with male. How masculine or hard butch someone is also has nothing to do with male.
I am a masculine female (what butch is to me), woman and lesbian as well as being a stone butch. |
ty ...... your right i dont believe there is or was any Stone threads.. hope more post .:) |
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I pretty much agree with Dapper and Bulldog about stone butch being related to sexuality/sexual practices (also I agree with what Dapper said about being both tg/ts and stone butch). That's the way I see it as well.
@cody, taking T or having top surgery or any surgery doesn't necessarily determine how a person identifies. You don't just automatically become transgender once you've been on T/had surgery. There are some who've had all of the above who id as a number of things, some don't even include the word transgender. Others might have had one and not the other done and id as trans, third gender, male, butch, whatever. There are others still who aren't on T, haven't had any surgeries who still id as any of the above. It's not necessarily dependant on what you've had done, but how you see yourself. That's my two cents, anyway. |
I'm pretty sure there are also plenty of TG butches who are not stone butches. So the two may be connected, but not always.
A TG butch and/or male might enjoy penetration, for example, whereas a stone butch who considers herself a woman may not. That's just an example. It doesn't make anyone less or more male/female, woman/man, TG, third gender, etc. |
about Stone Femmes.........
someone told me once...... that a stone femme could be defined like what a stone butch is ... but also ...... a girl who only dates stone butchs..... |
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Nods... There are several different ways stone can be taken.. The two that I hear most about are: Only gives... does not enjoy having certain parts of the body touched in a sexual way... Only recieves.... does not enjoy touching certain parts of the body in a sexual way.. |
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.. ahh .. .. i know this....... and trust me.... as for me........ they can touch me do me.any way they want too.. lol lol .... ok think i just made myself blush....:| lol |
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YAYYYYYYYY my truck is fixed and im now just waiting for dispatch to give me a load to do.... :) |
this is a timely thread for me... not too long ago at all i realized that i was shedding the ease with which i could share myself...
when i was very young... i did not share me... in my middle decades... say... 25 to 45 i was really ok with rolling over and over and over... i have never ever really wanted to be fucked... i could stand to have someones mouth on me... have actually enjoyed the hell out of it b4... also... touch being what it is i enjoyed that too... the last little while tho... i am coming to the realization that i may be becoming stone... i just do not want to be touched... by anyone... i am very lucky in that i have a pretty good relationship with what some call tantric techniques... i call the a life saver... i have been looking at all angles of this part of my psyche that is causing me to need to protect myself... and... i think that may be as simple as that for me... protecting myself... i love women... i want to never have to do without a woman... but... i think i could do without a woman touching me for the rest of my life... i just dont want it... someone weigh in here... would this indeed make me stone... or someone that is having an issue right now.. ?? |
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For me, being Stone has never been about feeling a need to protect myself. I just find all the pleasure I need in pleasing the other. That is where I glean my pleasure. Mental orgasm. P.S. I think it is really healthy that you are questioning which it is, rather than just assuming that all of a sudden you have become stone. A lot of folks would do just that, so that they wouldn't have to deal with it. I respect that and I think it is pretty cool that you are willing to put that out here. :goodluck: |
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i like what you said about the mental orgasm from enjoying my lover... that is the biggest and hardest thing i missed when i was younger and had to make myself share... and... thanks for the thoughts about figuring it out before i call it... tho i think that if i continue with the way i feel right now i will end up being stone... quid pro quo... |
Stone here. Have been for as long as I can remember. For me it is in the mind as well. Really don't like my junk touched. .02
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The musician reaches that other place when hy brings the instrument alive- together each is able to experience their potential- realize what they were made for. I was not made to have another take me in hand; I was made to be with someone who does not simply allow, but wants, needs to surrender. And in that surrender she allows me to be who I truly am. While some will equate Stone to simply having personal limits, for me it is far more encompassing- Stone isn’t about sex with restrictions, it is about everything- it is how we perceive the world, but more importantly it is about how we relate, understand, communicate, and connect to another. A Stone Butch is a Stone Butch- regardless if they are partnered- but without the one who “gets it”, they are not a musician, simply a person who knows how to play a musical instrument. |
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Much luck on your journey. |
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good morning too all the roling stones!!! or the kinda kinda not.. who knows
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Hello Stoners...
I guess I am going against the grain here and saying I don't understand limiting your dating pool by what someone has wanted or wanted in sex. I could never not want to be with someone because of what they want or don't want sexually, I suppose if that would be a dealbreaker for me ( I can't even imagine) it would be different. I guess I just don't see what is wrong with two people getting together and discovering what energy/magic/vibes they get off each other and rolling with it. The way I have been with one lover does not define how I will be with another lover.. It all just seems so predefined. I'm trying to understand I suppose. |
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thanks
i am trying to put up pics but i get message file os tp big - are you going to be around? |
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i will go to chat
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i hope that my posts didnt put any negative energy against being stone...
there is nothing farther from the truth in my head... i just dont want to embrace this until i know for sure that i am not reacting to some kind of outside influences or levels of comfort... or preferences of a lover even... i just want to be me... whoever that is... truly... |
We define ourselves my friend. Keep an open mind and find your own comfort zone. It will all work out exactly the way it should.
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Yeh..I agree. Be whatever makes you feel happy and what works for you. I like what you said about being Stone with the Tantric thing going on.
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Lordy, I never knew there were so many labels applied to people til I joined here, lol. I'm not saying that's a bad thing at all either. I've always known since I was in the first grade that I was in the wrong body, I am a man, pure and simple, always have been. No, I've not taken T, not thought about it for my own personal reasons, the biggest one being that I would not put my parents thru that, as I am the only, coughs, sex of this being, that they have. I have 3 brothers as well, all younger than me. My family accepts me just fine being the way I am. When my wife passed away I could not have asked for better support from my parents or my brothers and their spouses, they were all just as devastated by her passing as I was as they all loved her tremendously.
Two of my brothers know what a kinky fuck I am and are fine with it and kid me about it. They used to tease my wife when we'd come down to visit to get a reaction out of her and then tell me she deserved a spanking when we got back home, chuckles. I just don't go for all the labels, I am not defined by a label or what anyone else chooses to attempt to box me into. I define me! I am me, plain and simple. I choose how I will relate to someone in a relationship by their energy dynamic with me. So Rlin, don't worry about labels, they really mean nothing. It is how you see yourself that matters. It is how you interact with your partner and how ya'll see yourself as a couple that matters, all other opinions be damned. |
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But... A lover once told me that it was about feeling safe... and trust... He said... The more I trust, the safer I feel, the more clothes come off... He said... for a woman to get into his boxers, meant that that he trusted and he felt safe exposing the part of him that didn't match his inside view... (He was/is GID) If he was feeling emotionally unsafe or the trust wasn't there, then the boxers and the a-line were NOT coming off.. If you've had a bad break up recently, an emotional trama that left you feeling unsafe to share yourself... Something to think about.... I think there are so many reasons for someone being stone... Energy exchange Personal Satisfaction Personal Programning Protection Human Sexuality is complicated and so very interesting.. Myself... The more emotionally compromised I am, the more dominate I am... It's not safe to let anyone in close enough to share myself... So I turn it and make it all about them... The more dominant I am, the less I want to be touched... I'm not even aware of my body and it's physically distasteful to be touched... It's the mindgasm, the taking my partner to where they only dream of going that blows me away... Touching me actually shuts me down and turns me off.. It's all about them, because it's safer for me that way... The girl is me is crippled.. driven to the point of insanity...wounded almost beyond repair... Almost is the key word... Slowly... oh so slowly... (with the help of an incredibly patent and stubborn butch) I'm doing the work that will allow her to come to dinner and stay for a while... Sorry.. Got on a tangent there... What I'm trying to say is.. Only you know why you are the way you are.. There is not a damn thing wrong with being stone... With deriving pleasure from pleasing your partner... (and I have to say... Tantric? hell yes.. please and thank you...) if you are built that way... (personally, I think it's hot as hell to have someone orgasm from fucking me..)or if you choose to be stone... But if you are questioning, if it's on your mind... Then maybe it might be something else... Only you can know..... |
As a stone butch I don't see having sex as being pre-defined or there being any less individual variation as to how I would relate to a partner. I don't think having sex with a stone butch is going to be any more or less predictable than having sex with someone who isn't stone butch and there's plenty of room for experimentation, spontaneity and playing off each other's vibes and energy exchange. That's not to say that every person is going to want to have sex with or partner with a stone butch. It's not for everyone.
I do agree with Converse that I don't equate being a Stone Butch with having sex with restrictions. It is much more encompassing than that. For me, it is quite freeing not restricting. However, I don't think there is one, all encompassing Stone energy or that Stones can just nod at each other and know what one another is talking about- that's something I have seen discussed a number of times in the past, and I don't think that is the case. I think Stone Butch does mean different things to different people. I certainly don't relate at all when people start talking about feminizing touch or relating stone to being male. There are different types of Stone Butch and different personal meanings for it. |
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Your post jumped out at me.. maybe because of the time, 1:11 of your post (my own thing) and maybe because I have usually liked your input on these subjects.. I've seen the stone threads take a bad turn because not everyone agrees what a stone is. I liked what you said about leaving room for experimentation! I cannot imagine a world, or sex where it is so limited, dependent on a preconceived notion that I would or would not like something.. each person IS different. There are hard limits of course I realize this.. maybe thats why its called *stone* ? Stone butch (and stone femme) like MANY words in our vocabulary are user defined.. as it should be I feel. I get confused with the whole thing. |
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If I may....kisses are pre-defined. You know what's going to happen, in general, if you kiss someone. Or do you? Have you ever been kissed in a way and to the point that your heart flutters and your toes tingle? Have you felt the waves of love or lust eminating off of them though they've barely brushed your lips? Have you been kissed in a dirty back alley, hastily, with their hands twisted in your hair as you were shoved up against the brick wall? Have you spent hours lounging in bed, becoming intimately acquainted with another's lips? Have you expected one type of kiss...perhaps chaste...and been surprised by a lengthy, invasive French kiss? Or vise versa? Every kiss is different, though it is only a kiss. It's pre-defined. Or is it? My point is that what seems like putting limitations on intimacy to you is really ensuring that our partners (for the most part) will understand HOW we like to kiss, so to speak. I see Stone as less of an inhibitor and more of a freeing agent, allowing me to be me and him to be himself, and both of us with the understanding of how we prefer to move within our intimate relationship...and how we like to kiss. :) |
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