What every Femme should know...
 

Someone out there was meant to be the love of your life... your best friend; your soul mate.
He'll brush the hair out of your eyes, and send you flowers when you least expect it.
He'll stare at you during the movies, even though he paid $30 to see it.
He'll call you to tell you goodnight, or just because he is missing you.
He will call you right back when you hang up on him.
He'll lay with you under the stars listening to your heartbeat... or stay awake all night just to watch you sleep.
He'll kiss your forehead for no reason, and hold your hand in front of your Dad. He'll say you are just as beautiful without makeup on, and show you off to the world when you're in sweats.
He will constantly remind you how lucky he is to have you.
He'll look in your eyes and tell you that you are the most beautiful woman in the world, and for the first time in your life... you'll believe it.
You will know when you find him ---
He will be the one who turns to his friends, and says...
"Thats her..."

He'll sing to you even when he can't sing... just to make you laugh.

That is so awesome...I could have never said that better myself. Are you reading my thoughts? Are you inside my head?

So what happens to us Femme's who aren't validated by that him?

Are we less beautiful and valuable?

I absolutely agree. This is just what I desire to do for my woman. Whatever I can to make her feel special.

By no means are any femmes less beautiful or valuable. I feel that all women should be respected, valued and loved. All women are beautiful to me. (f)

Femme
 

As a Femme I think what every Femme should know is:

You're beautiful, valued and sacred be they coupled or single...

We should know that when we step out into the streets we are forces to be reckoned with, we're capable, independent, proud.

We're sex, candy, strength, love, sisters, lovers, leather, pink boas,friends we're phenomenal women.

Let's also keep in mind that not all coupled femmes have a "him" or "hym".

Many of us have a "her" or a gender-free, just plain "butch"!

What every femme should know...
 

You don't have to be a simpering idiot to meet and keep a good butch, and s/he's half-way decent s/he'll have some appropriate boundaries and won't be calling your ass back when you hang up on her--You'll then know you've found the one because s/he's got a backbone that keeps him/her strong during trips to the ER and Thanksgiving with your fucked-up family (where she might hold your hand, but most likely is too busy carving the turkey) and you'll be able to actually lean on her once in a while but guess what--She's going to require you to have some personal accountability and won't be staring at you slack-jawed during any of it.

I have read this poem before on a quote site. It didn't really do much for me. Because if she looks like the joker in sweats I'm going to tell her about it. I'd want her to tell me if I looked bad. Staying up all night watching someone sleep is very creepy. Maybe I'm not very romantic. But just because someone does all these things that doesn't make them the love of my life. I had a gf once who did those things and was cheating on me and stabbing me in the back every chance she got so.....

It might be a good idea to let her cool off before calling or back or you might get hung up on again.

hang up on me _ I wont be calling you back.
starring _ mom taught me that's creepy and I have to agree.
If I wanted smooshy time we would not be at the movies.
I wont hold your hand in front of Dad , probably ever.(depending on Dad)
I will tell you , that you are beautiful but not the most beautiful in the world.
As my best friend?, you will appreciate this because the truth is important to you.

:twitch:

Well lucky me, I never have to pay $30 for us to go to the movies because my femme is constantly getting free movie vouchers from her employer because she is a kick ass nurse.

My femme took me out for lunch just yesterday.

Yes I do take her out as well and I am a She.

p.s. she has never hung up on me

What every Femme should know:

Measure twice cut once. This goes for countertops, neat fabric for throw pillows, and the jeans you need to hem.

How to parallel park. Because driving in circles for 30 minutes looking for a spot you can just pull in to is boring and bad for the environment.

How to brew tea the correct way. Just because it irritates me when you do it wrong.

How to hang up blinds, wall art, and the telephone.

When to call it quits and when to keep on trucking.

How to sneak microwave popcorn and bottled water into a movie matinee because that shit should NEVER cost $30.

And finally that you are worth so much more than some dime-store creepy staring insomniac stalker who won't call you on your shit.

What every Femme should know...

You do not need a butch to complete you.
You do not need an identifying butch (male or female) to validate that you are a Femme.
You can shave your head and still be Femme.
Femme is not about what you wear, but who you are inside.
You are beautiful and not because you are being told by someone... But because you believe it.

The day I have to depend on a Butch to make me feel good about myself... Is the day I have lost who I am.
I am beautiful, because I am Julie - Not because I am told by a butch.

You do not need someone to pay for your dates.
You are an independent woman.
You can change your own oil and if you cannot, you can bring it to the service station.

Dammit... I keep going back to the brushing the hair out of my eyes. Where is it?
If my butch has to keep reminding me how lucky he/hy/she is to have me... I will eventually think they are trying to convince themselves.

This whole thing (while it is sweet in theory) scares me. Not for me, but for the countless Femme's that believe their self worth comes from a being partnered with a Butch.

Julie

What every Femme Should Know:
 

Is we have somewhere to go here on BFP...

>LINKY<

Nothing is absolute or applies to everyone. The sentiment behind this was sweet. Thanks for sharing.

Let us not forget.

Being Femme means you honor and respect your Femme Sisters.

Being a Femme's Femme is more important than any Butch on this planet.

Femme's should know
 

sit in your shiatsu massage chair reading food blogs and drinking cold brew

have a kitchen dance party

make jam at midnight, when it’s finally cooled down outside

spend the day napping and jerking off

read a good book straight through

try a new recipe

flirt with the fed ex man/woman like you’re in a harlequin

take a week off from facebook

wash your sheets and line dry them

listen to whatever you want, all day long

watch gilmore girls for hours, because you can

make your favorite dish. share it with yourself.

try on the clothes that make you feel pretty. prance accordingly.

wear your swim cover up as a nightgown

indulge your organizing neuroses

take a long shower

make your hair do funny things

write

remember that many people enjoy your company. being with yourself is no punishment.

What every femme should know...

...who you are is just fine.

...it's perfectly okay to choose to be alone....in fact, sometimes that's the best choice....for awhile or forever.

...you get to make your own choices....and so do your friends, your family and your partner.

...it's perfectly okay to choose to be coupled....and it's your choice who you do that with.

...you do not need the approval of others to be who you are.

...and finally, you really don't have to pay a plumber $200 to replace the flapper in the toilet....it truly isn't that hard to do.

...you are more resourceful than you may think you are. :rrose:

Yet...
 

The sentiment is sweet nonetheless as a Femme I *have* to speak up, lately there have been discussions in this forum about caution, care, duplicity, red flags. It's very easy for people to get swept up with romantic ideals, fantasies and realities get pushed aside..

I would rather educate my fellow community of Femme's of the things they ALREADY are, hearing them from a butch/guy/boi/boy shouldn't make them more valuable than what we see, feel, think and are...


Poetry like this is not the reality that happens to women, we're much more than fluff us Femme's so therefore I feel as a Femme that IS what we should know..

We are what we are because we make it so, NO ONE has control of that my loins don't control my destinies, fantasies, journey's Gender....

:)

You are so right Snow...
And in part, this is what being FEMME is about.
We call out the bullshit and we take care of our Femme Sisters.
We make sure they are not swindled or taken advantage of.

And sometimes... We have to blow up the fairy tale, just to keep them safe.

Julie who is so proud and honored to call you Sister.

and you can not speak for all femmes any more than I can, or the original poster. A lot of femmes might read this and swoon. Are they wrong in feeling this type of adoration meets certain desires and needs they might have? It might be more accurate for a person to read this and say not me. I am not THAT femme.

speaking of needs

wanting someone is hot
needing someone is not

huge difference

Grenade, I did NOT say that anyone was wrong, I am putting it out there that Femme's have other options, that they DON'T need to validate who they are via a butch/guy/boy/boi.

The title of this thread is

"What EVERY Femme should know"


So therefore since I am Femme I decided to speak not for EVERY Femme but for ALL Femmes especially those of us who do not fall into the heteronormative/mysoginist traps of relationships....

So what EVERY Femme should know is:

She can be the one in charge and not have ANYONE remind her how much the fucking movies cost... I found that to be pretty fucking gross not romantic hence why I spoke up because as a Femme it's insulting...

I am responding... Though the question was posed to Snow.

No, they are not wrong for feeling this way. It does make me a bit sad for those Femme's out there, that get their self worth from being loved and adored by a butch and who feel worshiped by a $30 movie.

The title of this thread is "What every Femme should know..."

Personally... I am just sharing my personal wisdom, as are some of the other posters. My personal stuff. Just in case there are some femme's out there, who never experienced the other side. Self worth.

Julie

With all due respect to the original poster, there's something slightly repellent about a butch telling femmes what we should know. My mother told me what I should know ... the rest I figured out the hard way, or learned from other brilliant, brave, beautiful Femmes.

I just want to say I'd find it very creepy if I went to the movie with someone and they stared at me the whole time.

Would prolly be the last date...



:)

So....I wanted to pop back in...and say that I, too, appreciate this sentiment posted by JistMe. I think many of us want to feel that rush of romance....of adoration....of being swept off our feet.

Nothing wrong with that in my book. :rrose:

I think, for me, where it stops is when this (above) is supposed to be all I am...the recipient of adoration.

Don't get me wrong....I like adoration. :) I want to feel that. I want adoration and love and dedication and faithfulness and passion and romance and all those wonderful sweet things that are the nectar of life.

It's just that there's so much more that I want.

I want to be respected for my strength, and my intelligence and my resourcefulness. I want to be protected when I feel vulnerable, and be the protective mama-bear when that's needed.

I want to be partners....in the real sense of the word. I want us to talk together, decide together, work together towards our goals.

I am not baggage. I do not want to be carried.

I am not an idol. I do not want to be worshipped.

I am not perfect....and neither are you. I want us to be perfectly imperfect together....for us each to step forward when it's a strength for us, and to allow the other to step forward when we are weak.

And, yes, if you stay up all night watching me sleep or stare at me through an entire movie....I'm gonna be creeped out. :rrose:

Femmes...

...come in all shapes, sizes and shades

...fall in love or lust or both with her, girls, bois, boys, him or hym

...fall in love, lust or both, with stones or switches

...we, ourselves, are stones or switches

...can feel strong at times as well as weak

...can take care of ourselves and at the same time, sometimes, may feel the need to be taken care of

...can be fiercely independent but sometimes feel very dependent

...can have long, flowing locks or short, spiky ones

...are moms and are child-free

...love high-heels and hate high-heels

...are free to define who and what we are

...because we are Femme

Every Femme should know what makes her happy. Unfortunately, this can take years of trial and error to figure out, but once you do it can be genuinely shocking to realize how much energy you wasted on things you thought were supposed to make you happy, but in fact were a colossal waste of time.

I thought it was very sweet, but it needs she pronouns to suit me :)

Lol!!!! :-)

What every femme should know- truck drivers in semi's can see everything you are doing in your car, we can read the gum wrapper on the floorboard behind your seat. We can see everything. Everything! And yes when you pass by they ARE looking and you can bet you're being talked about on the CB. Thought you should know that.

Fair enough ... good to know.

What if they were blind in one eye, and had to turn their head a certain way to see the movie and it just appeared like they were starring at you the whole time ?lol

unless they were a fish I don't see why they'd have to do that... O.o

and i try not to date outside my species lol

It was me that posted it on the quote thread….my reason for doing so, was to suggest a partner (however they identify) as gently loving and adoring their Femme in a positive way.

Sometimes it’s nice when your partner watches you sleep or you them; there’s a tenderness about it; a deeply loving trust.

No-one looks their best all the time, yet, your partner will think you’re beautiful to them anyway because they see all the facets that make their Femme who they are and some of the reasons they fell in love with them.

I appreciate something like this doesn’t stoke the fire for everyone, yet, for some, it’s nice to know they are adored in a gently loving way.

It still shouldn’t take away from any Femme what they need or should have; that’s for each of us to decide.