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"You should grow your hair out longer" lol
I've gotten two compliments on my haircut from random strangers this week. I'm used to a few compliments here and there.... and then there's my coworker this week who's a sweet, korean lady about 25 years older than me. I laughed cause she said, "You should grow your hair out longer, I like longer hair. Grow it out please!".
She's too sweet and too naive for me to get into a discussion about what being butch is all about. She's the kind of woman that hears a curse word from someone and audibly gasps in horror. Still... she's quirky and fun and I'm cool with it lol. Just sharing randomness lol. :) |
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Oh boy, are you setting yourself up for some ass whooping. LOL... Words |
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You know Cuddles, seriously. I have dated a couple butches with long hair. Short hair does not make the butch. Long hair does not make the femme or visa versa. Diversity is the key. Wear it like you wanna...be yourself. Above all else...be happy. p.s. Randomness is fun :) |
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I wear wigs for a short hair 'look'... I posted a picture of me with a very short wig on FB and I had 3 emails then a phone call... all to find out if I had really cut my hair. 'NO' LOL... when Betty Boop, Mrs. Brady, June Cleaver (Leave it to Beaver) and the Mom, from Father Knows Best. (the list could go on forever) All become butch icons, then maybe... MAYBE, ... short hair will make someone butch. |
at least she's not saying you should be married lol (the heterosexual way). or asking why not, and why no kids lol.
we must not forget the butch helped make the mullet a hot trend LOL. i do know quite a few butches with longer hair. mine is about on my shoulders. but no mullet lol. good for you on the cool haircut, cuddles. looking good! |
Poor Cuddles, in all fairness, short hair is more a butch trend. Now, I'm gonna get my hand slapped for NOT being diverse, and I do know there are butch folks with LONG hair, but....still. I get your post.
And I love you sister Pricessbelle! muah. |
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And can i just say, because i probably, most likely, i'm almost positive at this...stand alone with this statement BUT I loved the mullets. I thought they were sexy, still do. :byebye: |
ooo no princessbelle! say it ain't so! lol
i'm sure there are lots of butches that can make a mullet look sexy, indeed. the percentage is for sure high, ... more butches with short hair. surely to goodness. |
hahaha this thread is funny!!! I love all the replies...and yes one should wear their hair the way they are most comfortable with. I wear mine short on sides and tops..and longer in back. In fact, mine is "longer" than my GF's...and we neither one are "defined" Butch OR Femme by hair length..being BUTCH or Femme is much deeper than damn hair length....jus' sayin'....carry on....rotflmao
PS THANK YOU Belle! I HATE that word "mullet" but like the "business in front and party in back" haircuts! grins |
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I was sort of thinking the same thing... Cause this femme like the #3 guard on her clippers and don't forget the neck... While her butch wears her hair just about to the middle of her back... (when I'm not cutting on it..heheh) But the sun is shining, I'm not at work, and I understood that the butch in question was talking about what is butch for her/him.... |
I have extremely short hair but it has nothing to do with my identity. I simply hate having more than the minimum amount of hair.
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I prefer short hair on a butch but if they can rock the longer hair then, yeah, go for it. Anything but the Mullet, please. I just cannot handle the Mulls.
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lather.rinse.repeat.
do we really *always* have to split hairs?
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workin on a combover.. back to front... grinz
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I should have said "what being butch is all about TO ME (as in my personal preference for ME)"... my apologies.
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Wow, this thread certainly caught my attention, especially the OP :|
I have no words to describe what is playing in my mind right now :blink: Will I lose my butch card for having long hair? |
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thank you, cuddles. for sharing with us. always. i love a sense of humor. :rrose:
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Julie (Just call me Butch). |
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Am I way off? |
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I am not, nor have I ever, thought of only short hair as butch. I think it's silly to even assume I would think that. It makes me cringe to post on forums sometimes because it's easy to take other's words out of context or twist them around when all they were doing was talking like they would to a friend standing next to them. Sorry if I offended anyone, I'll be more careful about my choice of words in the future if needed. |
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Sorry, if you felt your words were being twisted not my intent. AND... I work for a Japanese organization and will say this, based on my experience in Japan and working with people in this culture. Hair is very important. Long hair on females is a sign of femininity. It is cultural.. As it is cultural in many of the Asian (continent) cultures. Julie |
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Thank you for understanding. |
I do think what Cuddles and Julie are sharing are actually very similar even though one is butch and one is femme- both are being told they should grow their hair out because that is considered more feminine (what a woman should be).
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So much of what "we" do as a society is sadly based on stereotypes. And the stereotype exists that butches have short hair and femmes have long hair. It's been perpetuated for so long that people forget that hair is not what defines a person. I have worn my hair short my entire life until I decided to grow it long two years ago. I consider myself very femme, even when my hair is short. Although I present on the OUTSIDE to be femme....it is what's inside my heart and soul that truly makes me feminine. How I think. How I go about my life. How I see things. All this is how I define ME and no one else.
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Being that it is a cultural thing for some I'm not surprised at all. I took the post as a random thought. Psst there's a thread for that too LOL.
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Not to get off topic, but it is off topic.
I was wondering when the whole "short hair for masculine, long hair for feminine" sort of ideals come from to begin with. I found this... For much of human history, both men and women had long hair, and men usually had long beards as well. In the 4th century BC Alexander the Great of Macedonia had his soldiers wear short hair and shave off their beards, so that their ememies couldn't grab their hair or beards in battle. The Romans were the first culture where all the men generally wore their hair short and shaved their beards, again for military reasons. After Rome conquered most of Europe and the Mediterranean, short hair came to be associated with what Rome stood for: civilization, "law and order", loyalty to the state, conservatism, military discipline, etc. Long hair was associated with barbarians, women, "effeminate" greek philosophers and wimpy romantics. The Roman senate took a dim view of emperors like Hadrian who "went Greek" by wearing a beard and longer hair. At answer bag.com For what it's worth. I was just curious...didn't mean to derail really. Personal note: Also, i can speak from my *me* space and say...i have long hair, always have and it has nothing to do with me being feminine. I just have a long neck and with short hair i look like a giraffe. And, well, i'd rather not. |
There are all kinds of stereotypes-including age.
I actually had a woman at work one time tell me she got her hair cut short because she thought that only younger women looked good with long hair. This is while she is looking at my long hair and I am definitely not a "younger woman". Btw, I have long hair because first and foremost, I like long hair on myself. On the other hand, I do dig crew-cuts, particularly on my butch. I just love to run my hand over the top of it:) :buzz cut: |
This is interesting thread! I have had very very short hair, very very long hair and everything on between. My dad always asked when my hair was short "when will you grow it out again". To him being raised in Texas girls are supposed to have long hair. I liked my hair short and I like it long. Right now is right at the top of my shoulders. I did not feel less feminine with short hair. In some ways I felt more feminine! I have to admit I do think I am too old for really long hair. Mostly because my hair is not as full as it used to be.
My Mom recently lost her hair to chemotherapy. I think that is worst side effect to her. She had beautiful white and black curly hair. It has made me think about how we view hair and how it affects how we feel about ourselves. When I get really anxious and in an OCD loop I do think about shaving all my hair off. It is kind of like a reset button for me. I have never shaved it all off but I have gone very short. |
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I thought that was obvious. I still think it's obvious. I just wonder why some people get SUCH a kick out of taking every. single. ***ing. word out of context and inserting bad intent that wasn't there. Hope that's clear now:) Words |
Sorry, that came across as sounding a little hostile. My apologies.
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I am not offended at all and did not think the OP was in out of line in any way. Stereotypes are funny (and sad) I like busting stereotypes. I have been told I am not really Butch for so many reasons, mostly for appearance reasons. --I have even been told I am not really Butch because of male gender ID--, So please feel happy with who you are! Enjoy the journey, find the fun and laugh at the world!
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Apart from the awful (sorry Belle) Mullet, I don't mind how a Butch has hys/her hair; the hair doesn't make the Butch! Besides, I like to run my fingers through hys/her hair. ;) |
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I've also been asked if it would be easier for me to have shorter hair.....why? When I'm out I wear my hair up. I've had long hair all my life; if it grew any longer it would be down to my knees! :| LOL! As julie said; Asian women love long hair. Tribal and other non-northern European cultures, women into old age wear their hair long. |
I wear my hair short for comfort,i'm also a free sweater so anything to keep me cooler is a good thing,once I wore my hair down to my butt then cut it off.
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On the other hand, I do dig crew-cuts, particularly on my butch. I just love to run my hand over the top of it:) -- *Anya*
anya, i like to run my hand over the top of a crew-cut too! what's that say about me? LOL i'm butch. oh my, what shall i do! lol love those crew-cuts. |
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Very interesting. And Rome was extremely anti woman to the point we do not have one single thing written by a Roman woman. We only know about Roman women via the writings of Roman men and much of what they wrote was highly mysogynistic. We don't know what they thought, what they liked, what they hated, what they valued, or what they thought of Rome and Roman men. So the Roman empire effectively silenced millions of women for hundreds of years. I wore my own hair very short for a few years (even spiky for a while). The nasty comments I got were downright rude and meant to shame me. Even my parents jumped on the bandwagon for a while and basically insulted me for short hair. Its just more gender role reinforcement from society that gets nervous at the thought of women not conforming. Melissa |
i wear my hair long mostly because i think it is LESS trouble this way
if you have short hair you frequently need a blow dryer and/or styling products i wash mine and it air dries into waves (over the course of a whole day lol) Also if you have short hair you are always having to get it trimmed! I get mine trimmed like twice a year ALTHOUGH someone is going to have to explain to me why getting an inch off all around costs 25.00 extra for hair below the shoulders. You are still cutting the same number of hairs no matter how far down the ends are! |
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Lol... Mitmo was very apprehensive the first time I took the clippers to my head... I had been going through the long hair period of my hair cycle when we met... Then she put her hands on that freshly cropped head... Heheh... Now that I'm growing it back out again, she's like... Sigh... I really like your short hair, I'm going to miss it... Grin... |
Slight digression: all of this hair talk reminds me of a post I read on the Planet one time written by a butch that cracked me up.
She got of the airplane and her mother took one look at her and said, "You will shave your head but you won't shave your legs?!" LOl! :buzz cut: |
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