Random's Ramblings...
 

On the way to dinner, she asks *What are you thinking*
I reply, *I’m not, I’m writing.*
*Good*, she says, *I love to read what you write.*

*You’re so quiet tonight, is everything alright?* She asks, as a vampire explodes on the screen.
*Yes, I’m just thinking* I say, with a wince, as the snake lady melts into a puddle of green slime..

*What are you thinking?* she asks, her voice languid with left over desire.
*I’m not*, I reply with a muffled sigh. * I’m writing… and I need to get this out..It can’t just stay in my head…*

Guiltily, I cover her damp body, kiss her, and leave her there… As if I am creeping from one lovers bed to another’s.

The cost of living...
 

In everything she does, she asks herself,
“What will this cost me?”
The cost, she thinks, isn’t so very high.
But sometimes, just sometimes...
She under estimates the price,
And it leaves her poorer than she was..

Mood Swings...
 

“You know, I used to go weeks without talking to anyone outside of work, maybe I’ve been too much alone in my life to be in a relationship! I could be totaly happy with just myself and a room full of books!”

She turns to me with a sigh, *Didn’t we have this exact same conversation last month?*

“Well, ya, and the month before that, and the month before that.”

“You know, I thinkg meds would be a wonderful thing to keep you in love with me all four weeks of the month..” she said with another sigh..

“Well, no one ever said menopause was going to be easy.”

She longs for me, as I long for solitude.
She needs me, like I need the quiet dawn.
She looks at me as if I am the sun and the moon, I feel like the distant stars.

Cold and untouchable...

Writers Trip
 

my words do not flow smoothly from my pen
but stumble and trip..
like a toddler learning to walk..

Heart Burn...
 

A taste of ash fills my mouth,
For a fiery heart
has left it's bitter remains..

Full Face
 

Ash and sack cloth?

No, not for me...

Paint the face, tie the bow..

The higher the heel... the deeper the pain..

Armor and paint.. Protect the fragile psyche..

The more I hurt, the better I look...

untitled
 

You do know how to stroke me, don’t you?

Be it passion or anger..

You set me a light…

I’m weary of being scorched in my own fire..

Let me cultivate peace…. Not burn in the flame

Tease...
 

I seek to sooth my beast..
To keep it well fed and content…
To turn aside from the easy anger
To face the pain…

Do you love my beast?
I think you must..
For you try to bring it quite often..

bad poetry
 

The sun will rise tomorrow, no matter what we say
The moon will go on shining, come what ever may
The tides will come in
Just as surly as they will go out
I will go on loving you, regardless of what you spout..

Small Wants...
 

Change in the ashtray
Kept there for small wants

Man on the corner, worn cardboard sign.

Does it matter if it is truth or a lie.

It is the asking
It is the giving
It is the unanswered need.

Stare ahead/ light red
Or
Roll down window /hold out hand.

Small wants or Large Life.

Witch Bottles...
 

The wild wind sounds through the sea grass
Ringing the Witch Bottles hung in twisted trees.

On the porch it plays with the wind-chimes
Teases the bits of glass hung to catch life.
It caresses the seashells
Giving them a voice.

It moves through a half open window
Giving life to the white lace

It becomes more than it was, going this way and that.
Part of it darts off
Up the stairs
Stopping to play with a missed bunny on the way.

Pushing open my half shut door
And blowing over my sleeping frame
Stirring the hair laid on my pillow
And then it is away..

I wake and smile..
Hearing the chimes and the voices of the sea..

My Alarm Clock
With out it where would I be ?
__________________

Just to the left...
 

There is a hole in me
where you used to be..
It lives between my breasts.
Just to the left.


I try to fill it with different things..

Work
Children
Friends
Chat
Food
Drink
Dance
Party

It covers over, but doesn’t heal
It’s fine for days..
And I think…
Maybe this time
It’s gone for good

But then
It’s there again
I can feel it

Living between my breasts
Just to the left…

Midnight Musings..
 

My rough, tough butch
Smells like ginger bread
At the nap of her neck.

She scowls, and scoffs
And says
“Nu-Uh”

But in the dark of the night
When I nuzzle in tight..

There is the most delightful scent
Just under the traces of her cologne..

It speaks of rich darkness, and heavy cream..
It speaks of hidden spices and sugars..

It speaks to me on a primal level..

And what it says is..

Home…

Wish Craft...
 

Once upon a time I wrote your name and mine in crimson letters
And offered the ashes to the four winds
Letting rose colored smoke carry my words to your heart..

Once upon a time, I bound you to me with colored string ..
Whispering your name and mine as I twined us together
In a circle, unbroken..

Once upon a time, I sighed your name in the velvet of the night..
Giving my very breath to the sky..
Watching a shooting star
Call you to me..

I say to you..

Let your words find a home in my heart
Bind me to you with your unbroken love
Call me to you with your shadowy breath..


Come with me and believe

In

Magik

This Room
 

Could I be a little girl?
In your arms
In this room
Just for tonight?

If I asked
Would you
Shut the door
Draw the blinds
Close out the real world
And create a new one with me…

Could you look at me in my cotton nighty
And understand that it was not the time for satin and lace.

Could you look at my naked face and my unpinned hair
And see what I was asking.
See what I was saying without speaking a word?

Would you give me your hard hands
Your fierce heart
Give me your strength so I might be weak?

Just for tonight

And then understand in the morning

When I pinned up my hair and painted my mouth

That it is only in this room

That I am

A little girl….

Balancing Act..
 

Stay
Perfectly still
Don't lean

Left
or
Right

You cause me pain..
Can't you see?

You make me numb
Don't you know?

With your wishy washy ways..

If you would just stay
as you are
Right now..

I will listen to you..
Do as you want
Be your slave.. (as if I am not already)

Because..

If you can't stay
then
I fear
It is the end of us..
and the beginning
of the surgeons job..
and the tap, tap, tapping of silver pins..

So..
Please..
Beloved Coccyx..
Stay Put..

High School
 

A Cheerleader Dear One?

Smiling at all the Boys while looking at all the Girls?

I would have been the shy one

The quiet one working in the library
Taking out your card
Memorizing all the details
Swooning in your wake.

If I had been brave
I might have asked
To carry
Your pom poms...

Line
 

Hair as black as ebony
Skin as oiled silk...

He moves like the panther
closing on the kill...

The lines, they come so smoothly
so earnest is the plea...

You feel that a denial...
will bring him to him knees..,

The blow does not phase him
does not bother him at all

For all it's sincerity

It Was Just a line After all....