What are your faults?
 

What are some of your faults, as perceived by you or by others? Feel free to clarify, if you want, whether this is something you've been told by others or whether it's something you came up with by yourself.

This is a listening thread so please do not respond to posts by others.

Also, please try not to disguise compliments as faults, tell where you think your faults stem from, or justify or add a "but" when describing a fault.

I don't think of this as a negative exercise. I think it shows an ability to be humble, reflective, and aware. It's hard to acknowledge and let stand one's weaknesses for the world to see, and I think it takes courage and is worthy of respect. I think it's an intimate and vulnerable way to get to know someone else.

Here are some of my faults, just off the top of my head:

1) I've been told that at times it's hard to bring up any minor criticism of me or issue of conflict with me because I tend to react unnecessarily strongly about it, crying and wanting to go over every aspect of the issue. People close to me have said that it creates an effect of needing to "walk on eggshells" or a desire not to even bring up a small issue because I will turn it into a big deal.

2) When someone else brings up an issue of conflict or I do, I've been told that I ask a lot of questions at once and very detailed and that it feels like being on trial with no right answer, that it's exhausting.

3) I'm often controlling.

4) I take on too much with the wish to please others at my own expense.

5) I'm overly anxious.

There's more but that's a good start :)

I can be incredibly intolerant of those whose perspective on life or belief system differs significantly from my own.


I tend to be very judgemental - both of myself and others around me.


I'm not good at communicating my mood - a lot of people, unless they know me well, think I'm constantly in a bad mood.

I can be emotionally distant, which can hurt people's feelings.

I can become distracted, and that can cause people to feel neglected.

My standards can be too unachievabley high, at times...for myself as well as others...and this causes undo pressure.

I'm not comfortable with showing my feelings...or talking about them.




*Interesting thread idea, nycfembbw.

My faults include, but are not limited to:

1) Indecisiveness (I think? Maybe? Not sure? Well, okay, sometimes) :blink:


2) Prone to stick my head in the sand like an ostrich when conflict surfaces until I am ready to deal with it :bolt:

3) Emotionally reactive/Defensive :explode: :overreaction: :furious:

:goodpost:


Oh, you mentioned 2 others I (conveniently) omitted:

4) Intolerant of people who do not agree with me :getout:


5) I can be judgmental also :kettlepot:

*I'm very quiet and don't show feelings often.

* I can be hassle-adverse and avoid conflict, even if when this is a bad idea and I need to act.

* I can be introverted to the point of being a hermit. (Introverted itself isn't a fault, but tending not to hold up friendships is).

* I've been told that I can't walk through a room without leaving some trace of my presence. My home life can be very disorganized without effort, while I'm the opposite at work. That one's getting better, though.

Me also, probably partly from upbringing, and always had problems getting my facial expression to match what I actually felt. I tend to smile too much regardless of my real mood, though.

I look threw rose tinted glass' too much
very sensitive
emotional and emotionaly needy at times when i am feeling down
quiet
defensive when i feel threatened
passive to the point where i let ppl walk all over me
fiery
I like to kiss alot
my own worst enemy

Faults
 

1) Im very strong and want others to be the same way 2) I was spoiled as a child and still am 3) Im stubborn. Theres more gotta think awhile. (lol)

When someone suggests a different way of doing things, my initial reaction is to become very defensive of why that would not work and why things should stay the same. I'm initially jarred by having to consider a change and express it by becoming verbally aggressive.

That's a good point. I'm not sure if it's necessarily under the banner of verbal aggression and it can as often be in written form as verbal, but I will often use innocuous language in a calculated way to express disdain at at viewpoint I disagree with.


My instinct is often to look for the worst in people.


I tend to react uncomfortably rather than with compassion when people are upset.



I can lose patience with people very quickly and appear dismissive.


I often put work interests in front of friends.

sometimes, not all the time, i don't stand up for myself. and sometimes there's a build up. if i don't speak up and then finally do (may not be about the same issue), ... i could possibly show a little bit of anger. i don't want to hurt others feelings. so i suffer. it's not a good thing. NO! i need to say that more often.

i am probably in the worlds worst category to procrastinate.

insecurity. i have been dishonest because i don't want to seem weak. because i don't want to look like i don't know what i'm doing. age has helped with this.

laughing at the wrong times LOL. like right now. someone told me one time that i hurt their feelings. i didn't mean too. it's a habit. i'm working on that. maybe.

there's more!

1. I can be conflict averse, trying to walk away instead of engaging. I have to force myself to stay in the room and engage.

2. I don't reach out to people, including friends, the way I once did.

3. This relates a bit to #1. I have trouble giving people (mostly my staff) criticism. I tend to emphasize the positive more than I should in some cases.

4. When I get really angry, it can be almost paralyzing. I have trouble seeing any other perspective.

BB

I am stubborn to an extreme.
I trust very little.
I want most everything my way.
Im very close minded depending on the subject.
Im a spoiled brat.

I crave touch, intimacy and while it's not necessarily sexual - sometimes people can't handle how sexual I am.

I am flirty, friendly and I crush on people all of the time which can cause people to become jealous or to get the wrong impression of me.

I am really bold. I have a Scots temper and while it usually comes out constructively it can be intimidating for some, especially upon meeting or after I have been with somebody for awhile and I become comfortable sharing a big part of my emotional interpretings.

I take a lot of pride in myself and in my work and sometimes it gets mistaken for being self centered

I can focus intensely on an issue or I can become distracted when I get too overloaded with thoughts or emotions. It's been said that people don't know how to open the lines of communication with me.

I can become emotionally distant when I am feeling moody

I don't always remember dates but I am great with names and faces

I have a gypsy soul. My concept of space is always changing and if I am in one place longer than I feel is right for me, I feel confined. This scares people because a lot of people feel secure being in one place.

OK, I have issues. Don't judge me, lol!
 

1. I put up emotional walls when people get too close. [I'm going to tell you that I am gritting my teeth while I write this, BTW! lol]. That was difficult for me to even admit in public!

2. I'm flaky sometimes and ultra-responsible other times and I cannot always accurately predict when the flake-out is coming, lol.

3. Sometimes I expect people to just "get" what I am thinking without my having to say it and when they don't it silently annoys me. To expound upon that, I don't always speak in complete thoughts. That really isn't fair!

4. My face is way red now, lol.


I'm not all bad; just a work in progress. :)

I am goal oriented but money hardly ever comes into mind when I think about accomplishment or the things I want.

I am stubborn

Sometimes I really enjoy the company of others and other times I would prefer to do separate things

I sing very badly to the cheesiest radio songs

I am very open so sometimes I will just expect somebody to know what I am feeling or thinking since I don't always have the temperment to talk about things.

When I get flustered, it's usually obvious

I am not the femme who only has dresses and skirts in her closet. Once or twice a year I like to wear a tie or a button up shirt, even if it isn't a "mens" shirt.

I don't need to go out to have a good time but I don't always like to stay in either. I need a really good balance between getting out to socialize/let loose and staying in to feel relaxed with friends.

Any partner of mine needs to be a fan of John Hughes movies, even moreso than Tim Burton films. It might sound silly but I have been with way too many people who have criticized my love for 80's classics. I do not see this as a fault. Is that a fault?

Faults
 

1) I would rather take pictures then hang out with people 2) I research everything 3) I am a perfectionist when it come to my photography 4) I want coffee and a kiss first thing in morning 5) I clean my house everyday hate a dirty house 6) My boots always need to be polished