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I agree w/ u cyber :) and I would like to add that it's not just a romantic: a soulmate can be in a friend or family member as well. A spiritual connection ~

I do.

But not in the terms of "24/7 happiness never an argument just perfect" concept. I believe a soul mate is someone who creates a positive tide in your life. They push you to reach your goals and embrace your nature. I think its a feeling you get that reflects your soul finding it's other half. I do believe it can also be something you find in a friend. My husband is my soul mate, but my best friend also holds a soul mate status because of the same reasons.

Yes. :love1:

Thanks to Wiki:

In his dialogue The Symposium, Plato has Aristophanes present a story about soul mates. Aristophanes states that humans originally had four arms, four legs, and a single head made of two faces. He continues that there were three genders: man, woman and the "Androgynous". Each with two sets of genitalia with the Androgynous having both male and female genitalia. The men were children of the sun, the women were children of the earth and the Androgynous were children of the moon, which was born of the sun and earth. It is said that humans had great strength at the time and threatened to conquer the gods. The gods were then faced with the prospect of destroying the humans with lightning as they had done with the Titans but then they would lose the tributes given to the gods by humans.

Zeus developed a creative solution by splitting humans in half as punishment for humanity's pride and doubling the number of humans who would give tribute to the gods. These split humans were in utter misery to the point where they would not eat and would perish so Apollo had sewn them up and reconstituted their bodies with the navel being the only remnant harkening back to their original form. Each human would then only have one set of genitalia and would forever long for his/her other half; the other half of his/her soul. It is said that when the two find each other, there is an unspoken understanding of one another, that they feel unified and would lie with each other in unity and would know no greater joy than that.

My perspective:

I researched Wiki because I had wondered where the concept of a soul mate originally came from.

I like Plato's concept of unity.

I think that if one finds a love that complements the self, that is as close to a soul mate that one could hope for.

I have had relationships in which we were so much alike I often did not know where I ended and the other person began. My 19 year relationship was like that. By the time I finally ended it- I did not know who I was as a person anymore.

I believe it was more enmeshment than that of soul mates.

My current girlfriend and I are in love and I love her as a person.

I don't know that she is my other half. I don't really even know what that means any more.

We are so different in the things and ways that my long-term ex and I were so much the same.

We don't like the same movies, TV shows, books. We have philosophical arguments that are ridiculous sometimes.

We both have a terrible need to be right until we have to laugh (if we did not already piss each other off).

Where we do totally connect is in our mutual respect, values, beliefs, sexual attraction and love.

For me, that is unity that I can live with- without losing myself.

While I respect those who disagree...
 

I don't think soulmates exist. I find the alternative is much more romantic.

For me, I think the concept of soulmates can be very seductive in that it kind of absolves us of responsibility for looking after our relationships, sticking it out in the tough times, trying to understand the aspects of our partner we might not otherwise want to understand, and it also allows us to more readily wash our hands of someone or something with the idea that "oh, if s/he were really the right one or if this were really the 'right' relationship, we wouldn't fight (or at least not this much) and it wouldn't be so hard. I guess we're not really 'meant to be.'" I think it also keeps us in relationships or with people with whom we otherwise might not (or should not) remain.

I think it's far more romantic to not have the belief in a soulmate but to give it a go anyway despite all the odds. To recognize each other's flaws, wake up each and every morning and make the conscious choice to love and be with someone, to acknowledge the fact that those initial giddy, feverish feelings of infatuation will eventually (and quite naturally) fade a bit with time and to be patient and aware enough to see and feel the deep, abiding love which replaces them... to make the decision to create a life together and respect and love each other as best you are able while accepting each other, warts and all... that, to me, is romantic.

I think the sticking point for me with the concept of soulmates (aside from, you know, being an atheist and all) is the idea of choosing vs being chosen. I want to be with someone who chooses me for who I am and what I am to them (and vice versa), how we mesh and who we are as a couple, and to not feel as though they think I was chosen for them according to some ethereal concept that neither of us can really adequately define. I need something concrete, tangible, and real. If you tell me you love me because the stars are aligned and you "just knew" upon meeting that I was "the one"... well, maybe that sounds nice in poetry and it works for some people but it doesn't really pass the smell test for me. If, however, you tell me you love me because you've seen me at my worst, now know my flaws, and you still want to be with me in spite of everything because you still get that ache when I walk through the door, to me that's love.
:heartbeat:

Anya that's fantastic.

After being married to someone who "understood everything about me" - for real - and had so much in common... That deep click...
It didn't matter.

And recently being challenged by someone... I loved it.

But this is really a great research study on those attitudes about "soul mates"
And how it reflects on a relationship

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/...-in-soul-mates

IMO... no they do not exist!

I feel like they do exist. In my opinion at least, its when you meet someone, and the click just happens, and things just happen naturally. I know some people say things shouldn't be effortless, but I feel like some things can be. Then before you know it, you two are together, and you don't even know when it happened, just that it did, and it was so natural, like breathing.

And when you are with that person, its amazing. The world doesn't stop spinning, in fact, the world starts spinning. Life even though it was good before, becomes even better, when you get to share it with the person whom you have connected with in such a way, that its a special, deep, intense, mind blowing bond.

The way they get you, understand you, participate in your life. They move, you move, you move, they move, and its all very fluid. They let your true self shine through, and it only enhances you.

Just my opinion.

My possible soulmate just brought me blueberry pancakes and bacon in bed.

I do believe in soulmates, I just think we might not recognize immediately
when we've found one. Some sneak up on you, some come in guns blazing,
and some have been there all along.

For me a soulmate is that person who just "gets" me. Not to say there aren't
some obstacles to get over, under or around, just that they make you want to
work to overcome the obstacles. When I find someone who makes me want to
be a better person that speaks volumes to me. Mainly because I feel really
good about the person I am already.

Now I'm off to do an equally kind gesture for her.

Isn't that what it is all about?

I have not believed in such thing... Until I met her this summer. It was a very strange feeling, a feeling I have never had in my life.

It was as if I knew her for the longest time even though I barely knew her. We just connected in a very emotional and physical way. We shared many interests. She just made me into a much better person overall. She opened my eyes to new things and helped me see myself much more clearly.

It seems like story of soul mates never end well though and I wasn't able to dodge the bullet either...Perhaps we just met at the wrong place and the wrong time but the time we spent together I would not exchange for anything in the world.

I miss her daily and she will always be in my heart. I am however, moving on... no matter how painful it is =)

IMO, a soul mate is someone who really "gets" you, sees your strengths without idealizing you and accepts your flaws without contempt.

Someone you can be yourself with, who makes it easy to be your best self.

On top of that, you share surface things with this person, like activities and aesthetics and ways of being in the world, not to mention, sexual energy.

I don't think everyone will experience that dynamic or have what we're calling a "soul mate."

I believe we do everything in our power to be open and true to ourselves etc. but there are things we aren't in control of, being in the right place at the right time to meet that person.

I don't mean to be negative, I just think that's the way it is. It's part of being alive, to accept this. IMO.

This is interesting...I've never heard anyone express that before.

But does this mean, then, that your soulmate could theoretically be your Mom or Dad? :|

The 'thing' with your soulmate is that you just can't go out and try to find them somewhere.

No, you find EACHOTHER..out of nowhere and at the weirdest places and in times you would have never expected. And you just know in a split second even only after sharing a few thoughts.

You know they are your soulmate because they resemble everything and everybody to you.

They are your father, mother, sister, brother, your best friend and even your puppy dog you never really had.

They are the best lover because they just KNOW what you need, feel and think right in that moment.

They look in to your eyes and see YOU for what and who you are and accept you just the way you are. Your looks, the way you laugh, talk, your voice, mind..they adore everything about you although you're not at any means 'perfect'. It doesn't matter.

A soulmate guides you through life, criticizes where it's needed and reels you back in when go too far and out of line, but always in a loving, protective way and always for your own good.

They support you in anything you put your mind to, because they believe in you.

With a soulmate on your side you have a HOME for life, in your soul and in your heart, forever.

They give you wings to fly out to the world so you can thrive and become a better person for yourself, them, your life and their's....

....only to come back home to the warmth and security of their arms.

It's absolute unconditional love for as long as you both live..and beyond.

That's my soulmate.