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-   -   How have you met the people you've been involved with romantically or sexually? (http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/forum/showthread.php?t=6161)

DamonK 12-28-2012 02:23 PM

Interesting....

1995 -- first bf... Met at oldest brothers house
1996 -- met him at church
2001 -- met her at college
2002 -- a random pm sent to me from gay.com
2003 -- gay.com
2007 -- roommate of ex from 2002 and had been friends ever since
2007 -- above and I in LDR, him not wanting to rush it and scare me off... So I kept dating a girl from work. We remained friends after I ended it
2009 -- dash site
2012 -- it began with a pm and a revelation and a realization

*Anya* 12-28-2012 04:31 PM

I had already posted in this thread about my longest term relationship and my current GF, so will go back into the memory vault for the boys before the girls...

1st BF age 12. Made out in my backyard until my dad busted us.

Last I saw of him in the capacity as my BF, was running down the street with his two broken arms, in casts, running like a cartoon character. (Fell backwards, pre-me, lifting his older bro's, too-heavy weights, falling backwards and fracturing his forearms).

Aged 13 & 14: Donnie. Last name escapes me. Made out constantly. Skipped school a couple of times. Think he felt my right breast once.

Aged 15-17: Mike M. Remember his last name but withold it to protect the innocent guilty.

I had described in a prior post, that I had gotten poison ivy all over my back and ass after we had sex in the woods (the soft greenery, clearly, was not just leaves:|).

Aged 17-22. Tom, BF became my ticket out of my parents house. Had my two babies with him so will always be grateful to him for my girls.

Aged 22-25, after we split: Joe C. Still remember his last name too. We were engaged but two weeks before the big wedding, invitations had been sent out and all, he broke up with me. Decided he did not want the responsibility of raising my ex-husband's kids or so he said.

Aged 25-26 dated girls and guys. Decided girls rang my chimes way more and have strictly been a lesbian since that time.

:)

homoe 12-28-2012 04:38 PM

This is one of my favorite threads to read. I am always fascinated and love hearing how people have met. I’ve only had one what I would call a serious relationship. We met at work, and we ending up being together for 14 years.

Beloved 12-28-2012 05:43 PM

To put it simply: If the internet didn't exist after I finished school, my love life would have been basically non-existent as well.

DapperButch 12-28-2012 07:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Beloved (Post 724410)
To put it simply: If the internet didn't exist after I finished school, my love life would have been basically non-existent as well.

Nah...we would just all still be in the bars...

BrutalDaddy 12-28-2012 07:14 PM

Have met a couple folks from online but those were situations where I was lucky to walk away with my sanity and life.

Had made up my mind to just swear off anything remotely romantic. Was better that way.....

Then, I met her.

Wasn't even attempting to get to know her or anything, she just has a really funny tag line on her profile (she was a member, like myself, of the dash site) that gave me a much needed laugh that day I saw her name so I sent her a message to thank her for the laugh. She messaged back and well, the rest is history. That was seven or so years ago.

Haven't looked back since and sincerely grateful every day for sending that pm and for her answering it.


I Suck With Remembering Exact Dates,
Brute.

Dude 12-28-2012 07:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by *Anya* (Post 724387)
. Think he felt my right breast once.

:)

are you sure it was the right one?

Ginger 12-29-2012 01:00 AM

Just a reminder... "when" isn't really the point; it's more about "where" or "how" you've met the people you've been involved with.

Do you tend to meet people online? Through work? Through a hobby or an interest, like bike riding or school or ... ?

It's really interesting to read how people meet their partners.

imperfect_cupcake 12-29-2012 04:39 AM

there have been way too many for me to put in a list. that would become rather embarrassing.

when I was a teen it was through school or at the Dance Hall or at a Gig.

when I was 18-27 it was through mutual friends, gigs, house parties, events, cafes and clubs/bars

from 27 - 33 it was all on line b/f stuff with the rare pick up in a bar

34 - 38 it was online London social site events (meet n greets, event nights) and the genderqueer-dyke bar/club and mutual friends and exes (house parties), as I made them.

when my wife left it has all since been from dating sites, save the rare set up from an ex. That's about to change as I get back into things and my very few local dyke mates (most of my friends at home are straight) plug me back into the local social life.

I'd like to take the focus off on-line as I don't really trust the dating sites... social sites perhaps a bit easier. dating sites are difficult. lots of people out there on cupid and pof, but I find it very difficult to get a feel for someone before meeting. Someone's sense of grace is really the main point of attraction for me. that doesn't come through till I meet them, though occasionally it can be seen in a photograph.

Nadeest 12-29-2012 06:34 AM

I met her thru a blind date that my brother set up for me, just after I got out of the military for the first time.
We met thru mutual friends, and were together for about three years.
Met her at a bus stop in downtown Detroit. I was going to work, she was just coming home from church.

Liam 12-29-2012 09:03 AM

The majority of women I have been involved with, were introduced through friends. Work, school and online were also places I met women. My favorite was a coffee shop.

Ginger 12-29-2012 11:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nadeest (Post 724746)
Met her at a bus stop in downtown Detroit. I was going to work, she was just coming home from church.


That one feels so romantic to me. I guess that "meeting on a train/ship/etc." thing is a classic way to find love ... It's like the start of a movie.

:)

Nadeest 12-29-2012 09:00 PM

I don't know about that, but I was certainly surprised by the relationship. lol

DapperButch 12-29-2012 09:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by honeybarbara (Post 724740)

I'd like to take the focus off on-line as I don't really trust the dating sites... social sites perhaps a bit easier. dating sites are difficult. lots of people out there on cupid and pof, but I find it very difficult to get a feel for someone before meeting. Someone's sense of grace is really the main point of attraction for me. that doesn't come through till I meet them, though occasionally it can be seen in a photograph.

What I liked about online dating sites is how quickly you can sift through people. Since I only ever dated locally, there was no need for anything to be drawn out. Two-three emails, maybe a phone call and then a quick meet. Next.

always2late 12-29-2012 10:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dude (Post 724494)
are you sure it was the right one?

Is there a wrong one? ;)

imperfect_cupcake 12-29-2012 10:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DapperButch (Post 725320)
What I liked about online dating sites is how quickly you can sift through people. Since I only ever dated locally, there was no need for anything to be drawn out. Two-three emails, maybe a phone call and then a quick meet. Next.

I don't really have the time though. With social sites I can dip in and out here and there, talk a bit, and there's a platform for conversation. I don't want a prolonged email blah blah, but I'd like some kind of common template to start with... I guess it's because I'm just no longer fond of dating. I much prefer freindship and attraction -> shagging and friendship -> seeing someone

the dating thing I'm just finding kind of hard. chatting because of mutual friends, and have some point of mutual link makes it much easier.

I think I'm just a bit tired. I think oh ugh, starting from point zero. why can't I just go hang out with some friends I find sexy and take it from there.

I guess I'm hanging with all my old mates, I've had sex with most of my friends before, there's no "trouble" they feel a bit like family and the thought of coming home and starting up with people with no feeling of familiarity... just makes my chest sink. I think that's why I prefer meeting people through people. It's just not awkward or stiff. But then, maybe I haven't met someone with the right click. Or maybe, it's just easier to relax and allow that click when it's at a house party/dinner party/mutual friends.

I think I just discovered I hate dating... I used to love it...

QueenofSmirks 07-20-2013 10:17 AM

I just realized the last three- I met each of them at a queer community dinner/brunch/lunch. Prior to that, it was often through friends, though, like many others, I met some online and eventually progressed to real time.


*Anya* 07-20-2013 10:38 AM

I met her on a well-known, legitimate dating site.

I was only dating people that were local and ones I could first meet for coffee.

With her, I skipped my coffee first "rule" and met for dinner. (First dates, I would always meet them rather than have them pick me up in their car).

It just was serendipitous that we clicked on our first date.

Novelafemme 07-20-2013 10:53 AM

1. We met at a well known guitar shop in Rochester, NY. He was a bass player in a rock band.

2. He was one of my best friends for eleven years and we worked together. He was a big factor in my decision to leave my then husband.

3. A queer website. She also lived in my hometown.

4. The Apple store here in Tucson.


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