[Gayla]

-As a butch of whatever ID, do you feel animosity towards (entire groups) of other butch IDs?

No, I don't feel animosity towards any group as a whole. I save my animosity for individuals!

Sorry, it was too good to pass up. Seriously, I guess I just don't bunch people together based on ID. There are groups of people that I know and like. There are groups of people that I agree with most of there posts. There are groups that I have personal issues with. There are groups that I don't like based on really stupid shit like the color font they use or avatars or lack of complete sentence structure. But I can't honestly say that I don't like or have issues with anyone based on their ID.

-Do you see yourself or ID as being at "war" with another ID?

My personal ID is so fluid, yet so ingrained in me, that it would be hard to be "at war" over it with anyone. I've got enough in common with everyone that, no matter their place on the graph, I can see their points and the totally opposite ones. It would be rather hypocritical of me to attack anyone based on their ID.

-Do you see any group of masculine ID's having an agenda to attack another group?
No. I don't see any public agenda and I'm not "in the know" enough these days to know (or care) if there are private ones.


I've said it a few times, in different threads, but the butch gender issue is not something I have ever experienced in real time. This is strictly an online thing for me. I've never had a conversation in real time with anyone about butch gender ID's except people that I met online on a BF ID's site.

I, too, get tired of going over and over the same things. I do feel that we spend a lot of time beating our heads against the same wall and, yes, it seems to always be the same people saying the same things. I have yet to see, here, any negativity to female ID'd butches. I have yet to see the same posturing, belittling, b.s. that I've seen in other places. Based on that, I like it here best.

Also based on that, I do have to question the victim mentality of some of those that complain the loudest. In the vein of "open communication" that this thread is allowing us, I have spent an awful lot of time lately yelling things like "Oh for fuck's sake!" and "Get over it already!" at my computer monitor. I have also spent a lot of time just turning the damn thing off. I don't think anyone is out to get anyone else on a general level. Again, I can't speak of the personal because I'm not privy to it.

I also cringe a little when I get "ma'am" just because it feels so foreign to me. I'm also read as female by the majority of the population in my day to day life. If I make the conscious effort to change my appearance, I can get sir'd more often. Right now, today, I get ma'am, lady, even missy a couple of day's ago. It's weird and I can't say that I like it but I'm secure enough with myself that I can admit I've let my hair get too long, I'm wearing different clothes for work, I'm looking a hell of a lot older then I used to so I am more often read as someone's cranky old grandmother these days rather than the hardass butch I still am in my head.

And right now, today, I'm ok with that. Maybe it's my age, maybe it's the time spent on my journey, it could be any number of things. I do wish that everyone, no matter their path, gets to experience this "OK" place I'm in at least once in their life.