Butch Femme Planet - View Single Post

Jesse · 07-09-2010, 02:30 PM

Hi Everyone,

I too have some PTSD issues. I was raised in an extremely abusive environment. The abuser was my mother. She was terribly abusive emotionally, mentally and physically. I left home at 15 and went on my own which was traumatic for me on it's own accord but still felt safer than being at home.

Still I tried for 35 years to "forgive & forget." The forgiveness came, but I'll never forget...and the forgiveness left very quickly because she is still an abuser to this day, mostly emotionally and verbally now. So about 3 months ago, one of my brothers died suddenly and quite unexpectedly and my dear mother once again made everything about her even to the point of verbally bashing my brother to me. That was the final straw for me, and I basically have removed her from my life...period. I changed my phone number, blocked her emails and I am just done with her and her sickness.

I have a counselor that I see a couple of times a month and this ensures that I keep on my path and remember to take good care of me which helps tremendously.

Over the years I have done a lot of inner work and the symptoms of PTSD, though still there, do not run my life anymore. Like someone here mentioned, I still have a hard time in a large crowd like at a concert or something like that, so I simply do not put myself into that situation and stick to smaller groups of people where I can feel safe.

You all have much courage and are encouraging others to take care of themselves, which will enable you as well. Cheers to you all!

Jesse

07-09-2010, 02:30 PM	#11
Jesse Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Transguy Preferred Pronoun?: He Relationship Status: single Join Date: Jun 2010 Location: Central West Coast of Florida Posts: 5,204 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 34,866 Thanked 17,781 Times in 3,940 Posts Rep Power: 21474857	Hi Everyone, I too have some PTSD issues. I was raised in an extremely abusive environment. The abuser was my mother. She was terribly abusive emotionally, mentally and physically. I left home at 15 and went on my own which was traumatic for me on it's own accord but still felt safer than being at home. Still I tried for 35 years to "forgive & forget." The forgiveness came, but I'll never forget...and the forgiveness left very quickly because she is still an abuser to this day, mostly emotionally and verbally now. So about 3 months ago, one of my brothers died suddenly and quite unexpectedly and my dear mother once again made everything about her even to the point of verbally bashing my brother to me. That was the final straw for me, and I basically have removed her from my life...period. I changed my phone number, blocked her emails and I am just done with her and her sickness. I have a counselor that I see a couple of times a month and this ensures that I keep on my path and remember to take good care of me which helps tremendously. Over the years I have done a lot of inner work and the symptoms of PTSD, though still there, do not run my life anymore. Like someone here mentioned, I still have a hard time in a large crowd like at a concert or something like that, so I simply do not put myself into that situation and stick to smaller groups of people where I can feel safe. You all have much courage and are encouraging others to take care of themselves, which will enable you as well. Cheers to you all! Jesse __________________ “You’re so hard on yourself. Take a moment. Sit back. Marvel at your life: at the grief that softened you, at the heartache that widened you, at the suffering that strengthened you. Despite everything, you still grow. Be proud of this.”