Quote:
Originally Posted by adorable
I want to make something very clear here.
Snow is right.
That doesn't contradict anything I have said. BECAUSE based on the information that we have at any given time (regardless of the color of our skin btw) we make choices to protect ourselves and our family. Period.
I think there is more information and to revisit something with a different view isn't necessarily a bad thing. She may or may not agree with that. But I know that when I have more information it might change how I view a situation. It might change the level of danger that I feel. It could also make it worse for her personally. Either way, she isn't wrong. It really isn't even a matter of right or wrong - it is a matter of safety.
I also think that as women, we aren't imagining that there are people out to get us. There are. It's real. People die from online interactions. There are a couple people on this site that I keep a safe distance from based on what I have seen in posting and from experiences that have been relayed by people who know them in real time.
Having a buddy system is something that I do here with one member. I know other people try to do that too them. I don't always have the patience. Some people have jumbled thoughts and type it out because it's what they're thinking. In their mind they make sense because they are thinking it. Then they are misread. So in an effort to clarify, because now people are jumping on them for posting that, they keep saying the same thing. As a buddy, I will pm the person and say people are not understanding your post. They will say, "but what I meant was" and then say the same thing to me as they did in the post and by now 15 times over in the thread.
30 pm's later all I can do is say, "I know what you meant. It's going to be ok."
Because by then, they are so upset and frustrated that no one likes them because of their post and no one understands them even though what they meant was (insert what they orginally said here which made no real sense to begin with) - that trying to get back to the original issue which was the first post where they weren't clear is the least of it.
So again, for me it comes back to capacity. In order for even a buddy system to effectively work someone has to fully understand that just because they are thinking it, doesn't mean it makes sense. And that to keep trying to say it over and over doesn't make any MORE sense.
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Snow has said many things, exactly what part are you talking about?
If someone here is threatening her or her family in real time family I am 100% in accordance that they should be kicked off the website. Hell, show me where they are and I personally will call the police and/or run over them in my car. Period.
If I appear to be saying something else, my apologies!!! I do not think anyone should put themselves in danger. I thought we were discussing maybe spending a little extra time learning about how people who are differently able communicate or avoiding people who stress us out. I am NOT saying she should place herself or her children in danger. Please!
What I am saying is that if someone with a disability bugs you, you can press the ignore button or try to understand their way of communication instead of discounting them as human.
I agree with her that rules are rules and should be followed. And if she is in danger I stand beside her in friendship to help protect her and her family.
I thought we were arguing approach. Tough Love vs. extra leeway, so I am completely lost now.