[Soft*Silver]

speaking from my point of view and where I am in my own history, I debating if I am capable of dating. Every attempt I have tried since I move back to Ohio has been a LDR. When I get a chance to date local or to meet the LDR, I get very anxious, to the point of misery. Its not that the last real time break up was so awful (it was, for both of us, and I am so sorry that it was that way) but it was a string of bad ones. I dont want to get hurt again and my picker is broke, as Blade once said. (waving at Blade...stealing his words) And yet I have long distance companions who I cherish greatly but I really dont know if I would be able to date them (or anyone) if they were local. So if I were to date locally now, it would be simply to see if I could do so with being anxious.

I miss cooking for someone. I miss reading the newspapers together. I miss having my feet massaged as we watch our fav tv shows. I miss weeding in the garden together. And going to the Drs together when we both get poison ivy. God I miss those everyday kind of things people who are in love and living together do with one another.

I also really miss the simple joy of waiting to be picked up for a date. Of putting on special make up to look good for him. I so want to pick out a movie to watch that will suprise him because he will have thought I wanted to watch The Notebook and I picked Deliverance instead. I want to smell his cologne on him as I hug him hello and I want to smell it on me when he tells me good night and I am alone to think about what could come next...

I miss this...but it also scares me . I am afraid of losing so much again. There was a time when I believed I could get much more if chanced it, than I could ever lose if it didnt work out. I dont believe that anymore....

Originally Posted by little man

i have a question for anyone who cares to answer.

when dating, what is your expectation/intent? in other words, are you dating with the mindset of finding a life partner? sex? a friend you can share small physical intimacies with (hand holding, kissing, cuddling, etc)? just to go out and have a good time with no expectations at all?

thanks!