[little man]

mild disclaimer: i'm still thinking this through, so the process is incomplete.

that said...

i agree with points made by jenny, gemme and bent. i think we also need to through into the mix societal expectations (in a general sort of way, not necessarily straight vs queer).

i think females are perceived to mature at a faster rate than males based, in part, on their societal roles. women are socialized to be wives, mom, caretakers of all who need to be cared for. men are socialized to be providers. it's a bit of a subtle distinction, i think....men offer up the materials for the work and women are expected to sew the fabric of a cohesive life from thost materials. it's easy enough to go out and work your 40 hrs and turn your paycheck over to someone and say "make it work". if you are not resposible for the lion's share of decisions about what gets handled first, in setting the priorities for making the sort of life you want, it leaves more time for leisure activity and just basic fucking off.

since this isn't a discussion about the fairness of division of labor and responsibility, i'll leave that piece alone. i was just thinking that i can't think of very many women who even have the option to play schoolyard games well into their 30s or 40s and make millions of dollars doing so. sure, there are some, but the disparity between men and women or male and female in those endeavors is heavily skewed toward men. determining maturity is a comparitive thing...male vs female. when the opportunity for leisure time activities is higher for one group than another, i think it definitely skews toward males for immaturity. in the world at large, i think men are offered more leisure time because they "bring home the bacon", take care of the "hard" or "heavy" work and deserve all that down time. toss in the disparity in earning power and it gets even more one-sided. personally, i think raising kids, toting them here and there, as well as managing a home and juggling finances is a hell of a lot of work. work i'm not inclined toward. toss in having to look after another full grown adult and oh yeah, a full time job? you would have to be mature to juggle all that and make it work.

in short (kinda), i think that responsibility and stepping up to it go into determining maturity levels...and expectations of who handles what plays into it as well.



this is as far as i've gotten. this is an interesting topic, rlin...thanks for the food for thought.