11-19-2010, 11:11 AM
			
			
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			#123
			
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			 Timed Out - TOS Drama 
			
			
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					Originally Posted by  CherylNYC
					 
				 
				I lost my partner in an accident in 2003. I still miss her, and I still catch myself thinking about how much better everything was when she was here. I was so overwhelmed with grief for the first few years that it seemed like it would never get better. It did, but I was changed in many ways.  
 
I lost my next girlfriend in Dec of '08. We had 8 1/2 days notice this time. I spent all of '09 crashing every vehicle I could get my hands on, some of them multiple times. I walked away from all of them. I spent all of this year getting moving violations, but I'm no longer crashing.  
 
My friends are nervously waiting for me to find some other way to grieve. I stay very, very busy. I've been funneling my energy into a motorcycle advocacy organisation that I started in the spring of '08. All my time is now occupied doing useful work, which was my goal. I may be a bit too busy and stressed out, though. I recently developed shingles. Ach! 
 
I'm approaching the second anniversary of my gf's passing, and this May will be my late partner's ninth anniversary. It still feels raw and fresh. I wish I could tell everyone how easy it becomes, but that would be a lie. It may not become easy, but eventually the grief becomes a part of your life, rather than your whole life.  
 
Take care of yourselves this Holiday season. 
			
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 I cannot imagine, nor do I ever hope to know the pain of this most personal of losses....your partner/mate.
 
Many Blessings for strength   
		 
		
		
		
		
		
		
		
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