Member
How Do You Identify?: Femmesensual Transguy
Preferred Pronoun?: He, Him, His
Relationship Status: Dating
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Rio Vista, CA
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I am no longer strictly identifying as a butch, though I used to. I am a masculine person born in a female body and raised and socialized as a female. I guess that puts me near the butch ball park. But I now ID as trans, so I don't generally post in and make pronouncements in butch threads. That said, I like what you are saying here Met, and I have a few things to speak to this topic.
One of my best friends ever is a gender-queer identified butch. He prefers the male pronoun, but isn't bothered by being called she. He embraces both sides of himself. He is not stone in bed. He loves to cook and is very domestic. He is a big snuggle bunny who loves to hug and isn't afraid to tell his buddies that he loves them. He is also sexually oriented towards other butches and FTMs. He has dated femmes and appreciates them, but butches and FTMs really do it for him.
He is someone I really respect and love. He isn't the stereotypical butch, but he is butch none-the-less. He is butch because he is masculine in a female package. He is butch because he has the heart of a butch. He is butch because he says he is.
His being into other butches and FTMs does not make him less of a butch. His being a soft-hearted snuggle-bunny does not make him less of a butch. His not being stone in the bedroom does not make him less of a butch. His being domestic and loving to cook does not make him less of a butch. He makes no apologies for who he is. He respects himself and won't let anyone tell him who he is or how he should be. He is as butch as anyone else, and I love and respect him with all my heart.
I think no one has the right to define some else's ID. No one has the right to tell someone how they should be to conform to a standard of how they think that ID should be. Everyone has the right to self-definition. No one should live in a confining, cookie-cutter definition of what butch, femme, trans, andro, etc., should be.
That's my view.
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