[Arwen]

Originally Posted by Ms Cyn

It's up to us to be mindful of each other.. While being true to who we are at the core... it's actually harder than going one way or the other.. Balance is the key, I think..

You are right.. knowing your crowd is the key... I feel more comfortable being a bit ranchy with some folks than with others...

So what are our obligations to one another? How do we live a life that is true to ourselves and still respectful of our fellow humans?

If I call someone a stupid redneck because they've just called me a dyke--who am I hurting, if anyone?

If I am angry at another woman and I call her a fat, stupid cow--have I insulted cows, other women and myself (since I am fat)?

I think on some level we ALL do this. I honestly do not know of anyone who doesn't react in anger and speak from that ugly place we all own.

How do I learn how to speak from that loving, joyful place? Is it necessary to do that all the time?

I think, for me, it is. I could live my life whining about how others have hurt me. Or, I can forgive them and release all that negativity in my soul to make room for better stuff.

That is one reason that I choose to seek joy. I've now layered in forgiveness for those who've intentionally hurt me. It feels good but it also feels weird. I'm not used to it yet. But I know when I engage in I will make it the good kind rather than the hurtful kind.