03-13-2011, 12:08 PM
|
#1993
|
Member
How Do You Identify?: QueerStoneFemme
Preferred Pronoun?: Ma'am or Damsel
Relationship Status: single
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: hovering here and there
Posts: 259
Thanks: 1,053
Thanked 771 Times in 199 Posts
Rep Power: 396593
|
unexpectedly lonely
greetings, everyone! i am new to this thread, will be turning 50 in May. while i do not mind getting older, i find myself getting enexpectedly lonely for company, specifically for that of a special butch in my life. i had thought to be perfectly content in the company of my room-mate (a lesbian friend, not B/f), my dog companions, and a newfound Elder Grandfather (not blood-related). lately i have found myself wishing for that someone who found me special, charming, pretty...who would send me good morning emails (for the relationship would probably have to start online,due to my relative geographical isolation), call me just because Hy wanted to hear my voice and knew i would want to hear Hys. Someone, who when we met, would have old-fashioned manners and treat me like a lady. i find myself missing the touch of Hym, even just the brief brush of my back as Hy pulls out my chair. the promise of more intimate contact in our eyes as we gaze at each other during our conversations, getting to know one another...
at this time in my life, i had thought to be concentrated on my inner studies, finding a Taoist or Buddhist community to join. i had not thought to missing...Hym. i had-or thought i had-relinquished romance to the first half of my life. now these feelings are coming unbidden back into my life. i didn't even want them. but here they are now, not to banished or fought against, but accepted. funny as i'm turning 50.
i realize that this is not much of an introduction. i will come back to this thread and do that at another time. thank you, whoever reads this, for joining me briefly in this surprising place of the heart in which i have found myself.
namaste,
DamselFly (though at 50, i really should be DameFly, LoL. i've always liked dragonflies and found the name of the female dragonfly to be lovely, hence my nick.)
__________________
so long as space remains
so long as sentient beings remain
i will remain in order to help, to serve,
to make my own contribution
(Buddhist prayer, a favorite of H.H.)

|
|
|