[Soft*Silver]

I too need to come back to this but I will start with a confession ...

all my life I have been the nurturer. I have even been so in my professional life. And yet, I could not let others nurture me. I was in denial about this until I became this ill. My confession starts here. I became so much more ill because I could not allow others to help me for such a long time. I continued to do for myself, even when others offered. I was unwilling to wait or give up what I wanted done. The end result was this...I pushed myself deeper into health issues. My surgery came undone and I created another hernia because the muscle wall was weak.

NOW I accept help. Now I allow myself to be nurtured. Now I realize its ok to be helped and supported and loved. I truly believe I had many many lessons I had to learn behaviorally and spiritually. (arent they the same?)

more later...