[Tommi]

For my dear friend Milana. For dear dear Rozella who arrived from northern California for her bi-weekly visit with Milana. "Why are you here?"Milana aked. The onslaught of chemo, radiation and the lung cancer, a feeding tube since june 15, and a woman who is so very tired of the fight.


The words I knew one day I would say, shot through Rozella'a heart and soul. Her husband Cres cried at the restaurant as we talked saying he knew it would come to this. I don't think Milana will ever go home again, I said. Rozella still holding on. Decisions need to be made before too long. For Oscar and Elizabeth, her two cats who have been waiting for Milana to come home since last June. Bless Suzanne who visits and cares for them twice day. They need to go to a foster home, and wait. Rozella, now seeing her baby sister fading to this horrid disease each time she visits the nursing center. For Milana, now refusing medicine and treatment, more lost and confused and angry each passing moment. The esophagus tumor is shrinking, the trach tube is better, but the body and mind are failing.

The call at 6 AM from Rozella in tears, asking which friends would visit Milana when she and Cres go home on Monday. She said she wanted Milana to vist her at Christmas, and we whispered a prayer for this suffering.