[Gemme]

Originally Posted by Jess

I do!!!


I agree that "energy" is a huge factor in the b-f tango, but submit that it is specifically "butch" energy drawn toward "femme" energy.

And vise versa!

Originally Posted by labete

This is largely how I feel about it, too. Complementary energies that, for me, give a kind of balance that works for me and reinforces my energy. I find that I naturally seek a kind of balance, and if the person I'm with is too much like me, my balance can be thrown off.

When I had my first female lover, she was very feminine, and I found myself feeling the yin side of me rise more, which (for me, myself, and I, not remotely speaking for anyone else here) subdued my yang in a way that makes me feel less true to myself. I don't like that feeling.

Yes, yes, YES! The more feminine my partner was, the more masculine (in term of energies...even though my dress and mannerisms did not change) I felt and I felt I lost that connection to my yang. I like my yang and I didn't like the feeling that that situation gave me. I relate to this part very much.

It's not about who opens the door or takes out the trash or cooks or washes, although such acts can be symbolic of the energy exchange if they are meaningful to the people engaging in them. It's about finding someone whose energies balance mine in a way that supports me being true to myself. For me, that means someone whose yin is more prevalent than their yang, and I find that in butches.

Eloquently stated, labete, and I find that that is how I function best in a relationship as well.