Quote:
Originally Posted by Scota_Parisi
If the reputation has two sides, good and bad, your risk is high. You will be dealing with the bad side once the honeymoon is over in the relationship. With severe behavior problems, "The Loser" will be found to have almost no friends, just acquaintances. Emotionally healthy and moral individuals will not tolerate friendships with losers that treat others so badly. If you find yourself disliking the friends of "The Loser", it's because they operate the same way he or she does and you can see it in them.
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One comment I'd like to make here is that it is not always possible to determine what type of relationship this "loser" has with other people right off the bat. Take for instance, the long distance relationship - where not being around this person makes it very easy for them to camouflage.
Most, if not all, "buy" their relationships in one form or another - and to the outside world - that is difficult to see until you are actually in it to see it. Those on the receiving end of this "buying" will claim that this person is "too nice" to be anything other than exemplary. Granted, they have a different investment in knowing this person than "you" (the sincere) would - which makes determining the healthy and moral individuals that surround them another hard call to make. They could be just as bad. "Birds of a feather...." It takes time to get to know them as well - and by then it's usually too late.