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genghisfawn · 02-22-2012, 10:48 AM

Hi Cuddles,

It seems to me that it's perfectly all right to be friendly with one's parents but still not share everything. If I think about my confidantes, my mother is one, but I don't tell her everything; my best friend is another, but I don't tell her everything; and my other close friend is another, but again, I don't tell her everything! All of these people sort of receive different chunks of confidance - they overlap in Venn-like ways, but one will always know certain things the others don't, and I think that's why I talk to at least 3 people.

I also think it's normal to want to confide in your mother and it's normal to not want to upset your mother, but you've said it's "kind of silly" (in your opinion, at least,) to have witheld information from her. Well, now that you've realised this, what's stopping you from divulging? In my experience, if you think your parent is open to hearing you and willing to set aside their bias for the comfort of their child, then let fly.

My mother is like that. She's the best person in all the world and I love her so much for it. I've gone to her with so many troublesome things, and she's listened for my sake and, although I know she feels absolutely dreadful about not having the recourse or information to help, she knows I feel better just telling her.

I think that if your mother loves you, you're fortunate, indeed. Maybe tell your mom you'd like to confide in her and you hope that's all right? Good luck to you!

02-22-2012, 10:48 AM	#10
genghisfawn Member How Do You Identify?: Femme/Gentlewoman Preferred Pronoun?: She/her Relationship Status: Happily married 05/17/14 Join Date: Jan 2012 Location: Saskatchewan, Canada Posts: 561 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,056 Thanked 2,158 Times in 403 Posts Rep Power: 21474850	Hi Cuddles, It seems to me that it's perfectly all right to be friendly with one's parents but still not share everything. If I think about my confidantes, my mother is one, but I don't tell her everything; my best friend is another, but I don't tell her everything; and my other close friend is another, but again, I don't tell her everything! All of these people sort of receive different chunks of confidance - they overlap in Venn-like ways, but one will always know certain things the others don't, and I think that's why I talk to at least 3 people. I also think it's normal to want to confide in your mother and it's normal to not want to upset your mother, but you've said it's "kind of silly" (in your opinion, at least,) to have witheld information from her. Well, now that you've realised this, what's stopping you from divulging? In my experience, if you think your parent is open to hearing you and willing to set aside their bias for the comfort of their child, then let fly. My mother is like that. She's the best person in all the world and I love her so much for it. I've gone to her with so many troublesome things, and she's listened for my sake and, although I know she feels absolutely dreadful about not having the recourse or information to help, she knows I feel better just telling her. I think that if your mother loves you, you're fortunate, indeed. Maybe tell your mom you'd like to confide in her and you hope that's all right? Good luck to you!