I think we should be careful about the your filters versus my filters and who has responsibility issue.
And I say that for one reason.
All the sexual harassment classes I've ever gone to.
The guy says sweetheart. He means nothing by it. But if the woman interprets it as harassment - then it is. If she's ok with it - then it's not.
It has nothing to do with his intention, and 100% with the way it is received.
And that is a very polarized example - and yes it could be argued rather easily that it's wrong and completely different.
So I'll pull up another point - dealing with difficult people in the work place. If someone has a problem with you and you're pulled to DEO - you better not say "it's his/her fault because of their filters, I didn't intend..." or "this is just the way I am, if he/she doesn't like it they are the problem..." It won't get you anywhere and may even see you lose your job.
Now we're in a casual laid back atmosphere here - but I have to say, maybe due to corporate / legal brainwashing, that anytime someone says 'it's your fault if you hear me wrong' - it makes me want to grab my documentation and get ready to head to a mediator.
Just a thought...
edited to add: oh shit I just realized this long thread is because of the way something was received instead of intended.
kinda makes you go hmmmm
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