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It's not the toughest, most butch-like act to admit to this sort of thing, but I know I am not the only one of our kind to have gone through this struggle.
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remember this: Every single thing you do/act/look is butch, no matter what it is. That is true because you are butch and if you are doing it....then it's a butch thing.
In my experience what femmes want from us is that we be real....to be who we are without shame or guilt. Muscle strength is way down on the list. Having a generous heart and acting from that heart are way up on the list.