[Ginger]

Originally Posted by Sue

That is so true about finding that validation from any healthy place can help...

Some times I've notice its not always easy to find that healthy place to validate, especially if ones anger is stem from an extreme unique situation...

Also timing too, meaning how long does it take to find this healthy place to validate.

Have you ever been in that situation where you either couldn't find that healthy place to validate, and or if you thought you found this place, were you ever not understood?

Sue

I think we all have at least one or two successful parts of our lives to focus on, when a bad relationship or some situation with a lot of destructive anger is threatening our state of mind.

I'm lucky to have a lot of external validation for my writing. I write web articles for a living, and my fine arts writing is well published and awarded. When I'm spiraling into depression because of anger I either can't express or feel (wrongly, of course), that I can't escape, I go back to my writing, and put myself in places where it will be validated, which makes ME feel validated.

So no, I guess I've never been in the situation you describe of not being able to find a healthy place in which to find validation, when stuck in an unhealthy dynamic of some sort. At least not in the last several years. In fact I literally write my way out of most crises.