Butch Femme Planet - View Single Post - More on where do I fit in? Labels, why do we need them?

G Snap! · 05-19-2012, 09:23 AM

I hope you are feeling better now, Laruss, it's been a month...

I think I can say I know how you feel, when it comes to the question "what is my label?" I was there for a little bit. I searched the internet, read a dozen write-ups on label definitions, and asked friends. I threw around a few, and questioned "what would others think if I presented such- and- such as a label?"
I do find the whole topic uncomfortable, as your chosen label can mean one thing, and something different when you start discussing what you do behind closed doors.
I think the whole label thing tries to identify gender and sexual preference in one way when they're two different things. And as sexual preference is not limited to what gender you prefer, it is still limiting as one person is different from the next and the traditional list of labels may not fit you.

I am a girl, who likes men, living with a man who's driver licence has a F next to "sex". As I identify as female, and my partner identifies as a man, I am straight. And as I don't care to discuss what my man and I do when we're alone, I will tell you our sexual relationship is traditional and the details are none of your business. (We like to keep our friends guessing.) I like to say "I am gay because I am happy, thank you very much!" And I refuse to choose a label as I hate them (and also think the "sex" should be removed from driver's licences.)

I am glad BFP has more than one spot for everyone to express their individuality and does not have a pre-chosen, check off box setup. I love seeing the variations people put on labels, trying to express their individuality!

No, you don't have to have a label. My advice for anyone who is currently confused about their "label" should either not worry about that and say " I don't ave one" or go ahead and wear what you think applies for a little while, and change it if you need to. Yes, you may change it if you like. If anyone wants to "get into it with you" about not choosing a label, tell them you haven't found one that doesn't fit - and be firm about this so you don't get sucked into arguing over it - like I was.

05-19-2012, 09:23 AM	#15
G Snap! Member How Do You Identify?: gay. I'm very happy, thank you! Preferred Pronoun?: Miss Relationship Status: Chefhmboyrd's seeing eye blonde Join Date: Dec 2010 Location: Nashvegas Posts: 253 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 412 Thanked 1,109 Times in 229 Posts Rep Power: 6596929	Label, schmabel, bla bla bla... I hope you are feeling better now, Laruss, it's been a month... I think I can say I know how you feel, when it comes to the question "what is my label?" I was there for a little bit. I searched the internet, read a dozen write-ups on label definitions, and asked friends. I threw around a few, and questioned "what would others think if I presented such- and- such as a label?" I do find the whole topic uncomfortable, as your chosen label can mean one thing, and something different when you start discussing what you do behind closed doors. I think the whole label thing tries to identify gender and sexual preference in one way when they're two different things. And as sexual preference is not limited to what gender you prefer, it is still limiting as one person is different from the next and the traditional list of labels may not fit you. I am a girl, who likes men, living with a man who's driver licence has a F next to "sex". As I identify as female, and my partner identifies as a man, I am straight. And as I don't care to discuss what my man and I do when we're alone, I will tell you our sexual relationship is traditional and the details are none of your business. (We like to keep our friends guessing.) I like to say "I am gay because I am happy, thank you very much!" And I refuse to choose a label as I hate them (and also think the "sex" should be removed from driver's licences.) I am glad BFP has more than one spot for everyone to express their individuality and does not have a pre-chosen, check off box setup. I love seeing the variations people put on labels, trying to express their individuality! No, you don't have to have a label. My advice for anyone who is currently confused about their "label" should either not worry about that and say " I don't ave one" or go ahead and wear what you think applies for a little while, and change it if you need to. Yes, you may change it if you like. If anyone wants to "get into it with you" about not choosing a label, tell them you haven't found one that doesn't fit - and be firm about this so you don't get sucked into arguing over it - like I was.