Yesterday's meeting was profound (as usual) and completely spot on. It blows my mind that each meeting I attend seems to be specifically fine tuned so that it dives into exactly what I am struggling with.
Obsession. Um, ya.
That oh-so-fun way we take something and turn it over and over and around and upside down in our brains, picking it apart and unraveling it until it has been dissected and pinned down at every appendage, all so it fits into an acceptable version of what we want it to be...so it either fails or meets our expectations.
How exhausting.
We, as a species, do this innately. It is biologically programmed into our developing psyches. The key to releasing your obsessions is to see them as stepping stones out of the darkness and into the light of day. Stepping outside the realm of ruminative thinking in order to sit with what exactly the object of that thought is trying to show us.
Just one drink and I'll feel calm and be able to unwind.
One more slice of cake and I won't feel so sad and empty inside.
The perfect car will help me find the perfect person who will then complete me.
The perfect clothes will mask how ugly I feel inside.
These obsessions only further remove us from the freedom of ego and self. The truth is that there is no "perfect" scenario that will lead to that ever elusive peace of mind. Peace of mind is something we have to cultivate and tend to on a daily basis by working the steps and holding ourselves accountable for our thoughts, actions and deeds. When we get off track it is up to us to guide our minds back to mediations such as the Serenity Prayer.
*taken from my own personal notes
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