[clay]

FONT="Arial Black"][SIZE="2"]Friendship Survey



Part 1 of 5: Logistic availability

1) How often do you see your friends in person
Visits vary...as most all of mine live quite a distance away...as in like few hrs. away or in another state!
2) How often do you talk on the phone, email, skype, etc. a friend?
Very often..almost daily with some, weekly with others..and maybe monthly with others...
3) Is childcare a consideration, when you’re making plans with a friend?
At our ages...smiles...none of us have that to worry about...there ARE perks to being "golden"....grinz...however, we most of us own a pet or two, or three...soooo finding quality, reliable pet sitters is sometimes a consideration, too!

4) Are finances a consideration?
Sometimes but isn't a huge deterrent....as each is considerate of the other's situations...smiles..

5) Is accessibility or health a consideration?
Of course......is just the right thing to do...as with myself, I have limited mobility, can't do stairs at all, and I am extrememly considerate of others with any sort of mobility issue, and of course, one's health is a factor....sooooo...yes.
6) Is your work or class schedule a consideration?
Absolutely not...as I am now totally disabled (medically retired)...so am "ready to go at a moment's notice...grin
7) Does last-minute planning figure into your friendships, either out of necessity or just because that’s the way you prefer it?
see answer above to #6

Part 2 of 5: Boundaries, expectations and values

1) What are your thoughts on butch/femme friendships?
Twofold...in that I don't have friends based on gender ID....friends are friends based on how our souls and hearts fit one another. Secondly, I have many friends of all spectrums on the rainbow scale....I simply heart them all!!!
2) If your partner didn’t like someone, would you still be friends with that person?
Generally speaking, absolutely. Factors to determine otherwise would be the reason she didn't like them in the first place. Not everyone will always like everyone else......
3) Describe a time someone cut you off as a friend.
Years ago, someone was in an abusive (physical & mental) relationship...was always calling me up to vent, seek advice, etc...and then....decided to stay in that relationship, and cut our ties all together....
4) Describe a time you cut someone off as a friend.
For me to do so takes a lot, and I mean a lot, of personal convictions. The last time I did this was hugely in part due to a lack of communication, first on her part, then a huge misunderstanding on both our parts. When someone doesn't communicate with me...then to me, it deems a lack of willingness on their part to communicate and work out whatever issues there may have been going on. Telling me you want the friendship to work and stay intact, yet not communicating...is difficult at best! In my heart of hearts, I deeply regret losing that beautful soul....and I miss her terribly! I will shoulder most of the blame!
5) How would you respond, if you realized a friend had a substance abuse problem?
That is a very difficult path to walk. Half the battle is for someone to admit they have a problem, then WANT to change their behavior. Otherwise, I have to leave that be...as I don't interfere unless my advice is sought. I will not be around those behaviors...at all...
6) How would you respond, if your friend were in an abusive relationship?
see answer to #5
7) If you began to have romantic feelings about your (partnered) friend, what would you do?
Moral compass is extremely important to me. Crushes and "likes" are all a part of our human makeup...and are harmless in most cases. I would never cross those boundaries...as I am a firm believer in honoring boundaries with partnered folks.
8) If you began to have romantic feelings about your (single) friend, what would you do?
Since this could be ambiguous as it isn't stated if I was partnered, or single... I will respond on both counts. Partnered: see above. Single...if mutual, then would be an avenue to explore...as both would be single.
9) If your friend had what you considered an annoying, albeit harmless habit, would you tell her?
That would all depend on what the habit was...tact & couth being relevant!
10) Describe a time that you “outgrew” a friend, if applicable.
non applicable
11) How many years have you known your oldest friend?
One friend for 43 years, a second one for 45 years. I STILL am very close with both.
How have you managed to stay friends, over time?
Our hearts grew into one another's. Both are very, very special to me, and will always be. One lives in Guam, and the other in my state... Talk with both often, email, and text one in states often.
12) Do you have any friends who are exes?
Yes, I do, in fact.
What’s your philosophy about that?
My thoughts are that a friendship base existed before becoming lovers, then parting ways, so I would hope that remained the case. I know circumstances prevent that sometimes, but I believe we should try to maintain those if at all possible. There are exceptions to all cases however!
13) How do you feel about “friends with benefits”?
That was a mutually satisfying relationship to me. I only share these when single, and with select few. So long as both are consenting adults, and are mutually single, it can be very rewarding. Of course, my heart is always involved....on some level. I won't do "casual, stranger" sex...
14) How do your expectations of a friend differ from your expectations of a romantic partner?
To be quite blunt...I don't believe in fucking my friends!
15) Describe a time when you really came through for a friend.
I bought someone a car several years ago...
16) Describe a time a friend really came through for you.
During a very scary point in my life, that friend gave up 6 weeks of her life to be by my side, even moving me during that time frame. THAT is a real friend!!! I still miss her!!!
17) What are a few deal breakers that would stop you being friends with someone?
Funny you should ask this one. IF I believe deeply within my soul and heart, that a friend is not making a wise decision, I will discuss it with her/hym, and should they choose to end the friendship over it...well....there is not much else I can do. Drugs and alcohol abuse...liars, thieves, and unscrupulous behavior towards my relationship are top of the list for me.

18) What are the kinds of characters flaws you can overlook in a friend?
[B][COLOR="Blue"]Almost anything petty, insignificant, or unconsequential would be among things I can overlook, deal with....BUT see #17 above for reasons of exclusion.

Part 3 of 5: How important is it to you that:

1) …your friend’s age is fairly close to yours?

2) …your friend’s educational level is similar to yours?

3) …your friend’s economic situation is similar to yours?

4) …your friend’s religious beliefs are similar to yours?

5) …your friend’s class background is similar to yours?

6) …your friend’s gender identity or sexual preference is similar to yours?

7) …your small or adult children like your friends?

8) …your friends like to include your children, when you hang out together?

Most of these are non essential. If they were to have kids, then when it is not an "adult only" event, those kids are welcomed with open arms...and would be expected to behave accordingly appropriate in any venue we are in.
Part 4 of 5: Which of the following shared activities with a friend appeal to you?

1) Attending singles events and supporting each other as you scan the environment for someone to flirt with, etc.
low on list

2) Exercising; outdoors or indoors
not
3) Watching movies or videos; at home or in a theater
Muchly enjoyed and appreciated to be doing!
4) Playing video or electronic games; at home or somewhere else
no thanks!
5) Attending sports events or watching sports on TV
Enjoy some sporting events...so would be enjoyable.
6) Participating in team sports
Oh good...golf cart OR electric scooter races....whoohoooo YES!!
7) Attending cultural events (museums, concerts, readings, etc.)

8) Shopping
Yes, please!
9) Cooking, or eating in restaurants
One of my most guilty pleasures!
10) Visiting wildlife centers, going to a county fair, hanging out to watch the dog run in an urban area, bird watching—anything that involves animals
Fun! Fun!
11) Other


Part 5 of 5: What important things has this survey left out?
When will we all get to meet you, Ms. Island Scout?!



BONUS QUESTION: In your opinion, has the fact that this survey was created by a femme, affected it in any way?

Absolutely not!!! I don't view gender in areas such as these surveys!